Skuit

I think it best we both just agree to 'Lismore'. On an another note, the actual Lismore prevented me from seeing the drawn 2010 AFL grand final until the final five minutes - which were admittedly pretty exciting after a three-hour [censored]-around. On an another another note, the town also saved me from viewing 186 until after the fact. Go Lizzie! My e-zine is by paid subscription only. P.s.: it's still Thursday night where I am at the present.

I've come to the conclusion now that if we win enough games to do so we'll make the finals.

It's actually me. In publishing and readership data, the left-hand page is skipped over a lot faster than than the right (more complexly so, after a certain number or combination of pages). Hence both a completely incorrect and highly obscure and abstract reference to your speed-reading as a metaphorical suggestion of benefit to a lacking right-side book-page impact/football wing in the AFL. If it helps to explain my general air of confusion, I achieved under-graduate accreditation up around your way in Lismore.

[censored] man, that's some serious speed-reading. If the AFL were a book, you'd be perfect for us on a right-side page.

Underwhelmed and slightly alarmed seems a reasonable response (and apologies if I went a bit too far in my 'investigative' hinting). To be perfectly honest though, I haven't seen enough of the Swans over the last year or so to make a fair assessment of his serious form plunge and the potential reasons behind it - shifting balance/game-plan etc. The last I can recall (sometime around the start of last year), he had claimed to be unencumbered by injury but the visual (and statistical) evidence certainly suggested that was indeed the case. A quick Google squizz just now and these theories and denials appear to be ongoing. He was, as you said, at least verifiably injured and missed a pre-season this year - which may be still hampering him to an extent. Assuming the injuries aren't chronic (which they very possibly are), and the decline in form not completely terminal - such that he may regain at least some of his dominance but maybe not to extent of his absolute peak - then the broader picture prospect of him coming to the Dees is an interesting one with a number of multifaceted elements. I say that after taking a big objective step backward after my initial reaction to your confirmation of my hunch and personal hope that the mail was the snail-mail version of the rumour-mill referencing an offer we'd supposedly put to Hannerbery a couple of years back. That said, everything fits and is completely consistent with our recent history to suggest that this is bona fide current development - particularly with respect to player profile and our evident long-game recruitment approach to targeted players. Taylor and co. (of the Roos' legacy) have shown that they will eventually get their man. So, on the basis that he can improve again to at least some level of his capabilities; the first question is obviously that of our need for outside-leaning runners - a specific bugbear of yours as a certain recent investigation has revealed (Dan doesn't have the dash but at least he can run all day). I'm immediately more comfortable with getting Hannerbery if we get Gaff at the same time. It then strikes as a pretty major off-season coup. Without Gaff, it would feel entirely flaccid - strange that. But once we address our primary need, I would then suppose Hannerbery takes on Jones's inside role as Jones transitions to Lewis's duties off half-back. This makes us an instantly better team, and we're lacking age-bracket balance in the middle - the maturity combined with the necessary endurance etc. to impact from the centre all day with Vince on his last legs and Tyson a spent force. We have precisely no one outside of Nat who has played more than 100 games and who will appear at the bounce this week. Compare with practically every other team in the league. With Gaff (160-plus games) and Hanners (~200) added it becomes a pretty potent and balanced mix of some very talented youth supported by a touch of experience with remaining legs (and final's experience at that). Then of course there's the cost - both as to the cap and trading capital. I've held the belief for a long time that we've been pursuing a Cats/Hawks dynasty model - giving the playing group (as close to possible) an early taste of success in the hope that we can keep all the accumulated talent together on reduced financial reward - one of the few levers (no pun) outside of father/son bonuses left to gain a competitive edge in a tightly controlled competition as to equalisation measures. A play for DanHan, on 'serious' coin, together with Gaff and Lever last year however suggests we're instead making a dive for the line in what we believe is our best window. Yet, in a broader business sense, that acquisition of young talent over the past few years is basically an accumulation of tradeable currency. I have no idea what it would take in terms off offloading and to where to bag a pick in the late first-round range to satisfy Sydney, and whatever it is it will no doubt hurt for supporters in the short-term, but it would effectively be a sell-off of stocks to aid the longer-term agenda. I.e. too expensive for Hannerbery on the surface, but an investment strategy. While many here have baulked at the prospect, Brayshaw would be the most likely option with value around the required range in this regard. In: Hanners & Gaff, out: potentially Gus, is a win on balance despite the immediate bitter pill (and likely ongoing flourishing of Brayshaw elsewhere - a footballer who I once considered a future club leader and probable Demon for life). Despite that, my conclusion is that the risk of Hannerbery being permanently crippled and never returning to anywhere near his best is far too great for the gamble - although, despite again my very reasonable MFCCS in this regard, I trust that our recruiters are across the issue in this instance and not just seeing stars (Sydney, however, being so readily willing to dump is a concern). Hopefully, his recent form-slump is just a matter of of the supposed in-principal agreement and best-case Hannerbery preserving his body for our charge to the flag! Mega-TL:DR (apologies) - maybe, but I'm an optimist and really have no idea.

Just as long as the public aren't leaving their random sprinklers on the track then it should all be fine.

Playing like his mind is elsewhere . . .

Simon told them that we're planning to do away with defence altogether in a couple of years so only one set of posts would be necessary.

While it means nothing, I think the Swans locked in DanHan on a pretty decent five-year deal just a couple of seasons back. Peaked in around 2016 . . .

Cheers for being a good sport GWD. I also now note that @ChaserJ, with an abnormal history of junior track-watching (not abnormal in the Cam Pedo sense but more so in a time commitment unless being compensated sense) has his own inkling or inside juice - the first to raise the interstate Vic query or question of confirmation. While I'll spare Chaser my finely attuned Detective Columbo skills, I'm curious if this slated trade (of nameless player) is something you feel is already leaking beyond close inner-circles?

I have no idea of the absolute figures titan, but if we're getting scored on at above 47% per inside-50 in 2018, and have conceded ten less goals this year, then it's safe to presume so. We're also second-last (or second-best) for inside-50s against to this stage of the season, whereas for 2017 we finished in 8th for the least i50s conceded. Just a reminder that while our back six looks horrible when it's scored on, we've moved almost the entire defensive battle up the ground.

I’ve applied some linguistic forensic analysis and profile profiling and computer says: 1) deliberately left blank 2) deliberately left blank 3) deliberately left blank Firstly, after a stalker-level detailed assessment of goodwindees' (herein GWD) posting history, we can conclude the following facts (taken at face-value but determined by my psychoanalytical expertise to be reliable): GWD has (potential player) contacts at Sydney, and recruiting contacts with at least Hawthorn and Geelong. Evidential posts: Have a very good source at the Swans (and Rohan, Tippett & Reid are out the door after a disagreement with Kennedy which came to a head vs. the Hawks) Playing group has lost trust in Rohan Interesting that Buckenara doesn't have Oliver in top 18 and my recruiting mates at both Geelong & Hawthorn tell me that both Clubs rate Oliver in the 15 to 20 range. Hawks rate Gresham higher than Oliver and Cats rate Curnow as 3rd best player in the Draft. Hawks are making a big play for Whitfield and are waiting for Board approval (will trade Rioli and Duryea) I was told by a very recently retired Premiership player (in 2016) today that Sam [Mitchell] is not only very close to Simpson but also to Hale who is at Freo . . . Bottom line is that Clarko was very dictatorial and basically told Sam (to go). - potential sources off top of head (if from Hawthorn): Brian Lake, David Hale himself, or, interclub journeyman and premiership talisman, Matthew Spangher. GWD also has possible contacts at several other interstate clubs (the origin of said Melbourne-bound midfielder), including all of Adelaide, Port, GWS, Brisbane and Gold Coast Although it’s difficult to determine the leaky party of a two-way trade-discussion, or if it’s just a matter of recruiter grapevine, potential evidential posts: (Adelaide, Port, GWS - albeit a fairly good bet at the time): Lever to Dees, Trengove to Dogs, Kelly to re-sign, these are certain (GC): Two pieces of info I found out yesterday is that Dees have a 5 year offer on the Table for Prestia. I wasn't told how much, just how long. (Brisbane): There is only one club that has made an enquiry [about Dawes] and that is the Lions but they were told, thanks but no thanks GWD was also involved with Sandringham for a period including at least 2004, and had earlier played for/coached De La Salle in the VAFA, which opens him up to any number of potential inside footballing contacts that this detailed forensic investigation can’t be bothered googling. However, evidential posts include: I remember speaking to Scott [Thompson] at the time of him leaving us as I was involved at Sandy Toby's [Greene’s] dad Mick and uncle Paul were terrific A Grade ammos with De La Salle late 70's and thru the 80's We won several Premierships on the back of Mick's rucking & marking . . . Age profile based on all player/team/coach references places GWD as born before 1962 but after 1956 (margin of error – approx. five or six years). As for football personality profile (Types 3 and 5 on the standardised ProDee Index), the most pertinent point here is that GWD has made it very, very clear that he’s keen on outside pace and class throughout his (relatively astute) posting history on Demonland, with little tolerance for plodders. While it may be argued that the desire for pace and class is universal, GWD has backed in Stretch on a number of occasions – indicating a prioritisation of these traits over others. With this preliminary personal and historic baseline established, we can much better assess the more recent textual indicators as to GWD’s contention that the MFC currently has an in-principal agreement with an opposition player to join the club for the 2019 AFL season. The following is a breakdown of the statements made by GWD in the ‘Outside Mids’ thread currently active on Demonland, with the ‘on-the-balance’ conclusions of this analysis provided in parenthesis or by way of sub-commentary. The basics: Victorian midfielder, currently at an interstate club. Since the AFL’s expansion to Greater Western Sydney (with a 2012 debut), the league currently features eight ‘interstate’ clubs – the description for those teams which are based outside of Victoria by people in Victoria. The interstate nexus comprises of, alphabetically, Adelaide, Brisbane, Fremantle, Gold Coast, GWS, Port Adelaide, Sydney, and West Coast – with the underlined the most prominent of those that GWD has stated a connection to. As to the more subjective sign-posts, the midfielder in question was/is: At his best circa 2014 (not entirely reliable as a single year but thereabouts) Having been a very good player (not a ‘superstar-star’ or anything overly hyperbolic) As exactly what we need at his best (suggesting, according to profile, outside run with class) Note: the Victorian mids with interstate clubs (although the player in question may not have necessarily been with an interstate club at the time) who finished in the top 40 of the 2014, 2015 and 2016 Brownlow Medal counts but have since at least marginally declined include: . . . Other indicators and clues: Four-year contract offered: (for a 2014-peaking player: suggestive of an age of 26-plus) On pretty big coin (still a pretty big deal on the open market but not outrageous money) Pick around the 15 mark (for a club which needs it due to a couple of trades that they are aggressively pursuing . . . Let’s say Gold Coast lose both Lynch & May . . . inside mail on where this pair might be going?) Last tid-bits: His club are aware and are comfortable with him moving (not currently key to the future of a particular midfield – either by way of present window or future development prospects – also, a reasonably mentally stable club) It’s not Rory Sloane (it's not Rory Sloane). GWD is also a big fan of Kelly and Bontimpelli so it’s not them either. And not Gaff, with GWD describing Gaff in the context of the ‘Outside Mids’ thread as a ‘critical need’. Conclusion: there may be a minor conflict in what GWD describes as ‘exactly what we need’ according to 2014 form and his underwhelmed reaction concerning the potential recruit based on personal preferences, such that the proposed decline in form may be balanced by the mystery player not having been especially outside or 'classy' to begin with. With all the on the table and subjective evidence at hand, this analysis has narrowed down the list of likely recruit candidates to one or two names in the league – maybe three or four tops. However, the investigation also doesn’t want to completely burn GWD on his source, so will quit right here.

Is it Jordan Lewis?

I've narrowed down the list of suspects. 6 Jordan Lewis 1 Jesse Hogan 11 Max Gawn 9 Charlie Spargo (wouldn’t be able to convince the cashier he’s over 18) 4 James Harmes (couldn’t find the guy standing all alone behind the counter) 12 Dom Tyson (he’d get caught too easily) 14 Michael Hibberd (moustache is a smoking hazard) 15 Billy Stretch (a bit of a stretch, I think) 10 Angus Brayshaw (you’re not allowed to enter 7/11 with a helmet) 18 Jake Melksham (prefers the harder stuff direct to the bloodstream) 23 Bernie Vince (would have been more interested in DeeZee’s daughter) 28 Oscar McDonald (Tomald says he’s not allowed to smoke) 2 Nathan Jones (c) (has the big c next to his name; is always jonesing) 3 Christian Salem (hypothyroidism linked to smoking in numerous studies) 5 Christian Petracca (ducking out behind the sheds explains frequent absence) 7 Jack Viney (c) (Jack Viney’s so tough he eats cigarettes for breakfast) 8 Jake Lever (the only player in the team who can afford a pack nowadays) 13 Clayton Oliver (pale, recent weight loss – clearly has cancer) 16 Dean Kent (released his own popular line of filtered originals) 21 Pedo (‘Hey, kid, you wanna cigarette? Jump in the back of the van') 25 Tom McDonald (out of breath from a punctured lung, huh? Right) 29 Jayden Hunt (there’s only one thing better than a chocolate milk . . .)

Here's a stat. 2018: Round 15 - points against 1173 2017: Round 15 - points against 1236 2016: Round 15 - points against 1328

Fifty seconds of selective footage with the title 'Melbourne's horror workrate exposed!!!" Goodwin needs to be sacked. But not before a Today Tonight expose can bring to light the true evil of the MFC.

Just click I saw some new roof panels to accommodate your OCD stevethenocommasmanjordan.

My workmates are all Dutch and I don't think can be blamed for any Demon debacles. More broadly, Arron vandenburg has been a bit of an issue, but I'm fairly certain he's Belgian.

You're Glenn Giles?

I reckon that we should get Gaff.

I have such an absolute unhealthy disdain for Caro that I'd be banned for life if I shared my true feelings on Demonland. But while she could have perhaps touched a little bit more on the rationale for Pert's recruitment, I don't have a problem with this article at all. In fact, it shed some light on a few things that were giving off an uncomfortable vibe (the silence from AFL HQ etc.) and I actually feel better and more confident about the appointment for having read it. Two in a row, including the camp article.

I'm actually a fan and believe he still has plenty of development left in him. Maybe Masterchef can also give us some tips on how best to prepare a headless chook.

Do you think they'll release the spycam footage when Frost is told he's off to the Gold Coast? Hopefully we learnt a few tricks from Masterchef so as to capture the full emotional weight of his personal devastation.

Imagine he cemented a spot and went on to win a flag with Port this year. One of the most unlikely footy careers. Good luck Jack. Apologies for keeping that flag from you.

How lovely it would be to a MFC KPD before your first game. Universal admiration on fan forums and yet to be subjected to top-flight teams penetrating your diamond. One slip up in one of the most difficult defensive set-ups in the league and he'll be off to the delist thread no doubt.