I sit huddled in near darkness, the only light coming through flickering embers in a damp fireplace, the room in total silence after the thunderstorm died. I wonder if they bothered to restart the game. 

No point really.

It was over before it started. The team’s five star generals in defence and midfield ruled out of the fray, a few others missing in action against superior enemy firepower and too few left to fly the flag for the field marshal defiantly leading his outnumbered army into battle. One of his loyal foot soldiers, Tom McDonald deserves a medal for bravery under fire. Kade Chandler was a defiant David but faced too many Goliaths and Kozzie took one down with a football act but, as they say, the victor gets to write the story when the battle’s won, particularly if the Match Review Officer is from the same side.

On the ground, no eyes on the football, plentiful fumbling, indecisive movement and little or no pressure applied on opponents. The brothers Daicos cut swathes like butter through enemy lines in the tradition of their forebear, history's greatest and most successful military commander, Alexander the Great of Macedonia. 

The troops they led into battle was no rogue’s army although judging by the way the crowd bayed for the blood of the mastermind of a past defeat, you would have been forgiven for thinking he was an alleged war criminal sitting in chains awaiting judgement at The Hague. 

Well done Collingwood. They were brilliantly coached. The purpose of cutting off the Demons’ few main remaining strengths was achieved. Sidebottom stopped Jack Viney. Max won his battle in the ruck but the combined height of their two big ruckmen was ironically a counterpoint to that advantage. Brodie Grundy sits in Sydney triumphantly mocking both sides awaiting the glory of the finals to come in a future that includes former teammates lazing in the sunshine of Ibiza or some island in the Caribbean at the very same time.

It was at the 20 minute mark of the third quarter with the Magpies defending a 21 point lead, that my mind wandered to a similar stage of the Demons’ final home and away game played in an empty stadium three years ago. Melbourne stormed home that evening, willed to win by an enormous reservoir of self-belief that ended in a goal-after-the-siren victory. Melbourne had that magic ingredient in 2021; the ability to win against all odds with teeth gritted firmly, something sadly missing in 2024. No come-from-behind victories this year.

As the 60th minute of our last quarter slowly ticks away, I sit here in silence wondering if they restarted the game and whether we made our comeback.

MELBOURNE 1.1.7 4.4.28 7.5.47 8.9.57

COLLINGWOOD 5.4.34 8.5.53 12.8.80 15.13.103

GOALS 

MELBOURNE Pickett Tholstrup 2 Billings Chandler Turner van Rooyen

COLLINGWOOD Cameron N Daicos Hill Lipinski 2 Allen Crisp Elliott Hoskin-Elliott Parker Richards Sidebottom

BEST 

MELBOURNE McDonald Gawn Chandler Pickett Billings Rivers

COLLINGWOOD N Daicos J Daicos Lipinski Allan Hill Sidebottom

INJURIES 

MELBOURNE Jake Bowey (knee)

COLLINGWOOD Darcy Moore (concussion)

LATE CHANGES

MELBOURNE Jake Lever (illness) replaced by Taj Woewodin

COLLINGWOOD Nil

REPORTS 

MELBOURNE Nil

COLLINGWOOD  Nil

SUBSTITUTIONS 

MELBOURNE Bailey Laurie (replaced Jake Bowey at half-time)

COLLINGWOOD Finlay Macrae (replaced Darcy Moore at half-time)

UMPIRES Leigh Fisher Brett Rosebury Ray Chamberlain Simon Meredith 

CROWD 53,957 at the MCG

Brilliant, Jack.

@Whispering_Jack👏👏👏

Or more concisely …

Dees bring a knife to a gun fight !!  

Outsmarted and Outclassed and Outplayed 

summary by Steve23magpie on X 

“another soft heartless effort by melbourne” 

couldn’t argue with that 

Thanks whisperer for all your efforts, you can have good rest like the rest of us 

Quote

Here's my Epilogue

In the week preceding round 24, we knew we had Riv's 100th.  We knew there would be a celebration for the surviving members of the '64 flag.  We knew that Nibbler was leaving and BBB was retiring.  ..... And the club told us that the week was to thank the 'fans" for their loyalty.

So, accepting those scenarios, what did our boys do?  In my view, they didn't come to play.

On top of that we have - whether manufactured or not - the issues surrounding Trac. 

With 2025 in mind and as with any AFL footy club, we need to be mindful of keeping/attracting sponsors, shoring up and hopefully increasing our membership base and providing that constituency with a clear and realisable vision.

Let's be realistic, we were deplorable on Friday night and we need to be upfront about that, on all levels.

Sad to think the only thing I care about for the next week or so (related to footy that is) is the prognosis for Bowey’s knee