Tarax Club

🕵️‍JT astutely choose young Pickett 🕵️‍Coiffure exclusive to Teddy’s Saloon 🕵️‍Life of the post goal 🎈 party

Empirical evidence suggests otherwise. Wonder boy didn’t raise a beep.

If our guys continue to chalk up premiership points whilst flying close to under the radar that’s fine. All those below daylight can scrap like a superfluity of steroided seagulls seeking substance from Gill’s leftover cold chips. All amply illuminated by the media circus spotlight of course.

Slurp… Burp… Yawn… F*rt…

Question is who’s head rolls first, Sweeney Todd or Brett Ratten? Given the saints propensity for appalling haircuts and diabolical skills. Tim Burton should be co-opted to document the saints season with the working title “Nightmare on Linton Street”

6. Christian Petracca 5. Ed Langdon 4. Ben Brown 3. Alex Neal-Bullen 2. Angus Bradshaw 1. Joel Smith Honourable mentions Clayton Oliver Jack Viney Jayden Hunt Charlie Spargo Max Gawn Tom McDonald Specsavers Award Umpire(s) responsible for gifting opposition with two dubious free kicks resulting in goals. Final summation Demons too good, a champion team well drilled and resilient.

Great to be at ‘G again sharing our unique Aussie rules game with a terrific crowd. Congratulations to the club for organising such a heartfelt inclusive celebration with due reference to our rich history of triumph overcoming tribulation. Last night’s premiership flag ceremony was definitely one for the true believers. The match whilst played for just home and away premiership points this time, was worthy of season opening status and a bona fide advertisement for our home grown game. Concur with what many of the previous posters have said about the team and individual performances. After being challenged by a highly skilled bulldogs outfit in the second stanza our teams’ response was full of determined resolve. The reshuffled defence was not made up by a bunch of second stringers but largely filled with experienced cool heads who ‘tightened the nuts’ as the game wore on. On this showing those guys waiting patiently in the wings will grasp opportunities when they arise. Expect skills including goal kicking to improve in the coming weeks, challengers and pretenders look out!

Your Top End correspondents will be in attendance this evening Currently enjoying repast and beverage at Bellota Wine Bar. Premiership hangover? Hair of the dog? Coiffured and cute but no bone. Hairdryers are getting a workover at Teddy’s saloon as we speak.

Thought Jack McCrae was the multi-vehicle pile up specialist. Parking at the Whitten oval car park is at high risk and not recommended by the RACV.

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WJ in another earlier life one could see you Phil Spector like twiddling the knobs to produce another hit. You’d expect more fight from the dogs, but you can only judge this mob on their last outing. Clearly we had the Four Tops. Even ‘the Bont’ didn’t make the cut.

If Max tossed Daniels there would have been an outcry! Students of Mad Monday may recall the ignominy of a Tigers end of season event that created a media storm in the HUN teacup. The PC takeout? Vertically challenged tossing ist verboten.Giant tossing? New season starts Wednesday 16th March. Gussies’ twin is salivating…

Understand Bevo’s motivation pulling out all stops to resurrect the bullies’ fortunes. But from this side of the fence, the message appears a trifle muddied. After concluding his holiday R&R reset which including readings ‘From the Inside’ , ‘Hits and Memories’ , 'How to Shoot Friends and Influence People’ and Das Kopit (an internal secret review published by the peoples proletarian committee for agrarian reform put more succinctly footy department). Is he channeling Che Guevara’s revolutionary zeal or Mark Brandon Read’s sensitive new age group think? In order to instill the “killer instinct” or "mongrel" that went missing so spectacularly in last season’s not so grand finale. And get back the bulldog bite? We await further developments… but we’ll know he’s serious if he trims his ears and joins the comancheros.

Carlton's performance while commendable was redolent of previous seasons promising much but ? mark on maintaining the rage. Though you would expect some improvement under Voss. Game of two halves, second half reset showed more determination and spirit. Positives James Harmes unstinting efforts and Oscar McDonald's game on Bayley Fritsch. Backline slightly bereft without five of the premiership seven. Joel Smith and Adam Tomlinson battled manfully against the bluebottle tide. Baffled by the umpiring decisions? Conspiracy theorists blame the Scott Brothers.

Like these fast moving on the ball guys?

Barry we don’t want Rupert to think south of the Murray expats residing north of the Tweed as teasers. Who knows you may get an offer you can’t refuse… Kayo for $5 a month for an annum! More concerned with the ad nausea replays of the game highlights made us feel a little seasick up here. Too much motion to contemplate. Is the Murdoch empire resorting to child labour or are Gibbo’s work experience kids using the viewing public as guinea pigs?

On very limited time Sam Weidemann’s cameo performance showed some promise ‘again’. Fingers crossed the stars align and the young fella finally gets a decent run at it this season. Ditto SOS.

Fawlty?

Some of the intense MFC training action from Earth at Casey Fields this morning.

Thank you Ernie, admittedly have been an admirer of your often erudite contributions here. Long may that continue. After all we have done the hard yards. Time to hopefully bask in a golden period for the club.

Ernest do your avatar proud! In my youth read a number of Hemingway's short stories and novels. Despite the contemporary mania for revisionism, with Hemingway described as being a chauvinistic misogynist or worse. He remains a great writer and character IMM who had vast experience of life spanning the tumultuous early and mid twentieth century. According to this anonymous source "In most of his novels, his heroes are seen charged with high intensity of optimistic attitude which provides them energetic strength to strive with calamities" May I refer you to your back pages in The Old Man and the Sea where despite the vicissitudes of alcoholism and old age his 'imagination of optimization' shines through. "Have faith in the Yankees Demons my son. Think of the great Joe DiMaggio Christian Petracca."

Young fella wearing Wrecker’s old number showed some toe and smarts. One to watch out for coached by that doyen of AFLNT youth coaches Mr Scotia at Nightcliff FC.

Agree with much of the sentiment here. Was BOG against the sCATs, in everything it seemed and followed it up for the big show with a committed performance. Jack has that seemingly rare elusive old fashioned characteristic as a footballer he plays for the guernsey.

The paucity of trackwatcher reports not a problem! In the spirit of synthetic test cricket calls we shall glean the pre-season zeitgeist from the odd occasional brief interview, snippet of vision or Ben Gibson's Training Gallery. Speaking of which Snap #29 Whose accompanying Kade Chandler? Add this Ex-Brighton Grammarian to our list in a heartbeat!