Previously known as LITD.

Husband goes to his wife with a duck in his hand.This is the pig I been sleeping with, the husband says.Wife says, that’s not a pig, that’s a duck you fool.Husband goes, I wasn’t talking to you.

Funny how we applaud anniversaries. It's a sad indictment when one really thinks about it. But congrats nonetheless.

Tracc at his best is a massive loss. But let's face it he was all over the place after the Moore incident. His goal kicking is abysimial and he has slowed down considerably. Often takes a quarter and a half to get involved. I think he, Oliver and Gus were all really tight teammates and things just went south. Maybe the club did so wrong by him but it seemed as if he wasn't as motivated as much as before. He'll probably be lethal again at his new club. But our midfield imploded some time ago and the changes are all probably for the best

It's come to this. Gee the dogs after winning their flag didn't deteriorate as much as us I get ten wins is a positive improvement but a pass should really be playing finals. The funny thing about goals and expectancy is that they are usually self fullfilling. The club needs to be aiming for a top four pass mark so that if we scrape into 8th it's not too shabby. If we aim for ten wins , I guarantee we will walk away with 8. I know we've lost a lot of talent but hopefully we have also lost the disharmony and division. I want that comradery of 2021 back in spades. And this should also be a make or break year for about seven players in my book. No more mediocre performances or attitudes. Enough with the poor delivery forward and the shabby kicking at goal. It's been going on far too long. And no more expectations of being given a spot. Even stars should be immune to this. I want players who don't chase and pressure with all the have dropped in a heartbeat. There's been an expectancy by too many in the past of being selected despite their efforts. That might put a rocket up a few. That's the real litmus test for me .

Low iqs.

A woman patient in a hospital had been in a coma for a number of years. Each day a nurse gave her a bed bath. One day while washing her private parts she notices that the monitor shows an increase in heart rate. The nurse tells a Doctor, He considers the results and calls her husband. When he arrives the Doctor suggests that oral sex may help. The husband agrees and they pull the curtain around the bed for privacy. 30 minutes later the monitor shows her heart and breathing has stopped, then she flatlines and is obviously dead. The Dr rushes in and asks the husband what happened, he looks at the doctor and says “I don’t know, maybe she choked.”

My dad loved that one too. Except his was gas BBQs.

I’ll just leave this here… Bravo. Reminds me of the true story about Murdoch in his early days going out on a bender with the editors on a Friday night. Next day Rupert complained to his close friend who was the actual culprit that he was so drunk he had vomited spaghetti all over his trouser leg. Murdoch said he must have been wasted because he doesn't even like pasta. I wish I could vomit on the old fox.

I'm part Irish so..... An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders two shots, drinks them both, and then leaves. The next day, the Irishman returns, orders another two shots, drinks them both, and then leaves. He continues to do this for some time, when one day the bartender questions him, “How come you always order exactly two shots?” The Irishman replies, “well, you see my brother and I used to go out drinking every night, but he lives across the country now, so every night, I order two drinks. One for myself, and one for my brother.” Things remain the same for a while until one day the Irishman comes in and orders only one shot. The bartender becomes concerned and asks him “how come you’re only ordering one shot? Did something happen to your brother? Is he ok?” The Irishman replies, “of course not, my brother’s fine. I just quit drinking”

That's funny. I think I picked up something about a chicken farm towards the end but that's about it.

Should have gone with the constipated one who worked it with a pencil.

Someone started a thread of good or positive news. This one's for fave jokes or vids. Ill assume winning coin toss and go with two. An old Christmas joke and a Monty Python sketch A bloke has his neighbours over for a few Xmas drinks and informs them they need to have at least some small festive item to fit in. His first guest is wearing the old novelty reindeer antlers ....so no problem. The second is more relaxed and just wearing a red and white shirt ...the basic of efforts. The third has done sfa and when challenged by his host suddenly lights up and pulls out a pair of woman's panties from his back pocket. " A puzzled host looks at the underwear and asks rhetorically....."What the hell do these have to do with Christmas?" His neighbour beams with a big grin and cheerfully exclaims .... "Their Carols " And favourite MS sketch...... monty python funniest joke share' https://share.google/mrr4lefa0yPgLOkNF

I used to enjoy the mucked up band bookings at the end of the show like Joan Kirner mistakenly hired as Joan Jett or Rex Hunt for T - Rex....Bang a gong...let's get it on. Just your old silly University humour not as in your face as the Young ones but I enjoyed both. I recall a lot of English programming back in the day. Alas , like even our little bit has gone mia for Us rubbish ( Mash excluded,). Some of it of course was rubbish like on the buses and love thy neighbour but dad's army and the two Ronnie's was just pure gold...... Take a look at this video, 'two Ronnies fork handles' https://share.google/vFIObqKA9zHgeLbPm I think Demonstone would enjoy the above given his quick wit and play on words. And dad's army characters do not get any better.... https://share.google/2eMYjtxVBl5qibHv7 Enjoy.

Would that it be twer so simple to speak like this.....Take a look at this video, 'tim watson football speech late show' https://share.google/iLpL3GcCDKyfCsdjp

Nothing to see here