Very Jaded

A smart move to be smashing them by enough to be able to have our entire AA squad on the bench with 10 minutes to go. Very good planning 😂

Chris Scott “I gotta get on the bus. I’ll keep my answers short”… yeah mate you gotta get on the bus to the retirement village. The pudding is waiting.

I need to have a serious chat to Mark McGowen. Can my Covid free hamstring be let across the border to donate to Steven May? The hammy is fresh. I’ve been sitting on the couch for 220 days.

Out: JJ In: Hunt (sub)

This breaks my heart but I agree that if May isn’t 1000% you bring in Hunt as the sub.

I literally haven’t been calmer in a second half of a game for years. My heart is at a low comfortable 190 beats per minute.

Greene will be alright for Casey I guess.

Seriously what just happened? Where am I? What day is it? Who are we? CARN THE [censored] DEES!!!! Also, eat a salty bag of testicles Geelong

Solid bench

RIP Geelong It has been a pleasure destroying you.

This is so beautiful

Max [censored] Gawn. Take a bow you start.

Need a better second half from Oliver. He’s been quiet by his standards.

Half time analysis: we are doing well but poor goal kicking is letting them back in it. And of course nice cheating umpiring. May on one leg is a real real issue. Our backline will not cope if Geelong get going in the middle.

Ok I’m going to put the phone down now. Super proud of this club and what we have become and achieved this year. Good luck and CARN THE MIGHTY DEES 💙❤️

I’m not there. I was asking those who are. I’m on the couch [censored] myself.

How is the crowd in terms of Melbourne v Geelong split?

JJ sub.

God damn Basil Zemplis 🤮

Channel 7 said Jones not in the side. I did see Melksham get off the bus. Potential sub?

Nervous breakdown o’clock is upon us.

I’ve reached vomit levels of stress. Why is this day going so [censored] slowly???

I’m a lot calmer now after a few wines

Shiraz is the answer to both. Dessert will be champagne if we win. Vodka from the bottle if we lose.