ICU2 Jerry Jerry

Smashed in the air again.

Jeff has run under the ball and squibbed 2 easy AFL marks already. Unforgivable to do it twice in a half. Bruise free stuff from Jeff. Won't play next week

Omac. Just clueless

People feeling "sorry" for Chunk do realise he's made more money than Sam Mitchel, Jordan Lewis and Joel Selwood by playing his footy at Melbourne yeah? We have been terrible, yet had to pay a min cap to someone didn't we . . . His best was b+ footy. Great fella, great Melbourne man whose done very well financially out of the club too. It's not going to be a fairytale and we need a whole lot more out of a skipper. Love the chunk but it's time to move on.

The problem with the club is that there is no club. We're nomads. We have no spiritual home to walk the halls of after training. No tangible history to embrace, forget the G . . . It's just where we play. We're like a start up club trying to create something out of nothing. The 12 flags count for nought. We have no soul. The players, staff, coaches can all change but in the end we don't stand for anything and we aren't anywhere. That's reality How do you take you're kid down to "the club"? There is no club Every other club in the league has a club, their club not a temporary share arrangement with 2 other teams [censored]

The Melbourne football club IQ average is about 75

The most putrid thing about this club is the lack of learning. We play the same game on repeat every week. The opposition simply doesn't matter. We have a hell of a lot of dumb at our club

We over complicate footy. 1 on 1 we would beat most sides, definitely St Kilda. So stuff zone defence and just play the shoulder and win the hardball. Impossible team to watch. I hate watching us play

Weiderman deliberately running under it to avoid contact is my new rage trigger. Harden up

Time to get serious about this umpiring nonsense. It's been killing us for years

Goals from point blank make me spew. It's so bloody pathetic

Put Jones in the forward pocket for the rest of the game. He can kick a goal but not hit a target around ground.

Richie Vandenberg wasn't captain when the Hawks won the first of 4 flags. Why is Jones. It's over, it was over last year for him. It's much more of an issue that it looks from a glance. How are the young guys expected to take orders from a bloke who does nothing on game day. Nothing

Ya know . . . Excuses this, surgery that, when we get (x) player back we'll structure up this, umpires that . . . Whatever. All I know is this is year 37 I don't get my [censored] turn, longer for others. Yes I'm whinging and yes there are more important things in the world . . . But when your winters are affected by the emotional and financial investment in the club as much as they are. I'm sorry but put up or [censored] off We're owed the glory now. We've put the money and tears in for too damn long

We're a fraudulent side. We gather inside 50s by putting more numbers at the source and forward of ball. Fraud. The numbers are irrelevant. We leave 4 oppo forwards goalside ALL GAME

Nowhere near it. We're so far off top 8 level it's frightening

My inflatable Jessie Hogan is sitting in the corner of the lounge room right now . . . Scared . . . Scared of the fork that's coming from the kitchen drawer . . . He knows he's going in the bin (aggressively deflated) but doesn't know exactly when. I'm actually having fun with this

Fremantle you are my no1 enemy now. Stuff the lot of you. We're happy to keep Hogan you idiots, but, we DO have a contingency plan that you're now screwing with. Whatever happens in this TP from here, we are going to bury you and pummel you for the next decade. No mercy. #raisehell

Watching Dravid bat is more exciting than this trade period

This is what being a good side looks like. Fringe players like Dean "Hurt Locker" Kent will seek opportunity elsewhere whilst we move in some ready made pieces. I wish him the absolute best. Can play. But not an AFL midfielder with his tank and too injury prone for any more than 1y deals. Hope he makes a fist of it at the Saints

Asked the crowd for the scores over the mic at least 5 times. Got a headache but I'm home safe and sound. I'll ask them all again next friday . . . . And the friday after that. Hell I've got a whole summer of it

Footy seems to have a funny way of scripting itself, even somehow poetically. The two sides who have been the architects of all our pain Geelong (186 and the near 20 Kardinia hoodoo) and of course Hawthorn who have bullied a pillaged us almost sonce their inception, including embarrassing us on merger night. It's the way it had to be. We needed to go through these two sides at the G in consecutive finals in order to change the narrative. Footy gods at work here. We got this. Go Dees

I'm playing a gig at Lambys in Geelong starting in 30 minutes. I'm already half cut and they're all going to know I'm a Demon Good times