Mazer Rackham

I was driving past Gosch's and saw Max working on his runup. Managed to sneak a couple of pics. Looks like he's improved it out of sight.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm ..... that sounds alright. My mind is made up. Who wants a spare ticket?

Anything's possible in this cockamamie world. Here's something just as conceivable, probable and even likely. They flubbed it, as they have flubbed nearly every challenge in recent times. (Go further back in time if you want.) This is the team that is "burning" after their finish to 2017. They can't sleep at night! They'll run through brick walls, these guys! Even go on a boot camp to prove their single minded will to win! Currently ranked no. 1 at Champion data at "flubbing it" and "putting the cue in the rack" categories and last in "grit & determination". Bouncing back against RFC is the absolute minimum these guys have to show.

Life is but a series of missed opportunities. (For "life", read "barracking for the MFC")

I thought of that but didn't want to over-egg the pudding. But you are welcome to make your own joke about people throwing remotes at TVs. (Sorry, I gave away the punchline.)

I think that must have been their warm down. But I was wondering why two groups? I was looking for hints as to who might be up for selection on AD. Maybe those six players (9, 12, 15, 21, 24, 44)? Does not compute.

Happened past Gosch's this AM. Caught the last 15 mins of training. Most senior players not there, it looked like a VFL training session. Players mostly doing interval work, but jogging. Slow run 100m, walk 100m, repeat. All timed. In two groups. Spargo, Tyson (I think it was Tyson), Stretch, Pedo, JKH, Smith in one group. Everyone else in another group. No "name" players except in first group, and Hunt in second group, and Hannan, who was wandering around by himself taking the occasional casual shot on goal. Smith has a strapped shoulder and held it every so often. Looked like he was trying to work out how sore it is/was. Hunt also with strapped shoulder. Is it injured? By jingo ... physique on him is extraordinary. Looks like Viv Richards. I believe the main group of senior players were doing rehab at the Alfred in the cardio vascular ward. Receiving heart transplants as the previous ones seemed to be shrivelled up and barely functioning. Experts baffled.

This just in 10,000 Demon Fans Out With Broken Hands Fans believed to have punched walls, slammed table tops, in unexplained epidemic last Sunday afternoon.

I'm watching Australian Rules Football, AFL comp. What are you watching?

We'll add this new failing to the existing list of not paying: holding the man, dropping the ball, in the back, throwing, short kicks ...... you know, the fundamental rules of the game.

Yes, some strange results can occur. Of those teams you mentioned ... Dogs Pies Dons Tigs ... are any of them renowned for not having a dip? Are any of them renowned for dropping games they should win? Not one off but repeatedly? Are any of them renowned for being soft and folding every time the heat is on? We are at a major crossroads. Next game is season defining and if it all goes wrong, may be the one we look back on as the coach killer.

We do have quality players. Where we lack quality is between the ears.

Why don't they show us what a bunch of nervous nellies we are, and fight off a Collingwood reserves team? Put the issue to rest. Or put a team to the sword when we're 5 or 6 goals up? Percentage boosting smashing. Or put up a credible fight against Hawthorn? Why don't they do those things? God knows they've had plenty of opportunities. Maybe it's not us.

Good find. It happens that none of that is in the rules. Only in Kennedy's head. Kennedy said that he can't stand next to the man on the mark, as that would be two men on the mark. Rule only says one player from the opposing team can stand the mark. Says nothing about what happens if someone from the ball holders team also stands on the mark. (Although they would be in the protected zone, but rule is absent on that one too.) Even if we go by what Kennedy says as local by-laws peculiar to the AFL, we still didn't see them being enforced correctly. Dogs breakfast. Rules & "interpretations."

That is actually covered in the "advantage" rule. The current interpretation is that if the scragging player is coached by a genius, and the scragged player is from a loser club, then f**k 'em.

We may never know what the "interpretation" is (rules need "interpreting"? must be badly written then) as it will change from week to week and game to game. The nearest thing we have ... and we can only use it as a loose guide, like the AFL do ... is the actual rule. Nothing in the rules about where to stand behind the man on the mark. You can stand 2cm behind if you want. If you stand next to him, you are in the protected zone. Rule says NO player may be in the protected zone. But what is the penalty if that player is on the same team as the guy with the ball? Rule is silent. Poorly written, poorly "interpreted", poorly adjudicated, poorly everything. Could be a description of the AFL rules & umpiring! Oh hang on ... it is. Bugg deserves some kind of award. The Razor Ray Hanging Judge Sympathy Award for being the only bloke this season (past and future) to be penalised for that.

What, they're only grappling with that now? They need to have "that" discussion pre engagement. Some of us dealt it a long time since. Still the only DEMONS fan in this household.

Also. Goalkicking. Gawn, Bugg multiple times, Garlett, ANB, maybe others. When the game is on the line, those are the ones you must put away. With a bit more scoreboard pressure who knows what might have happened. Having said that, it might have papered over the cracks too. The mental issues are always lying just under the surface when not on full display. But to miss the way those guys missed, as in, missing the side of a barn, is what is technically known as bu11sh!t football.

I've thought for a while that other coaches are putting more work into studying us. Which is why Hunt has been ineffective, why Melksham and Hibberd have not been firing. Lever exposed. Now Clarkson has shown the football world the blueprint for beating us. Not that the other coaches had no idea before ... but now the i's have been dotted and the t's crossed for them. Richmond will play exactly the same way. It suits them beautifully. Swarm in huge packs and smother us.

Coaches were warned off it a few years back when Malthouse was all over it. Dear old Heretia Lamumba, in his Harry O'Brien incarnation, was a gun at it. Now it's come back big time and the AFL are sitting on their hands. It's completely against the spirit of the game. It's just wrong. God they're inept. However! In the rules, NO PLAYER is allowed in the protected zone (unless they're chasing their oppo, etc). 50m penalty. But in true AFL "the real rules exist only in the head of the current umpires director" fashion, they say nothing about what happens when the player is on the ball carrier's team. So strictly speaking, they can do it. The only rule in play would be 15.4.2 (shepherding), where you can't block a player more than 5m from the ball. When was the last time you saw that being paid? Even though it happens week in week out in a huge number of "long ball" situations? But when the umps allow blatant and severe pushes in the back ... when they allow tackled players to slump to the deck and roll the ball away ... when they constantly allow short kicks ... throws ... why would they worry about a "technical" rule like this? The only rule in play seems to be that Clarkson is a genius, so why shouldn't he be allowed to do it? I note that after a few weeks of leniency, deliberate OOB made a triumphant comeback. I am convinced that after a "dark age" where the umpiring has been consistently terrible, it is now worse than ever before.

My internet cut out at half time so I didn't get to enjoy the second half. Which is merciful not just because of the pounding we copped. But that game was modern footy at its absolute worst. Australian Rules Rugby. Packs of seagulls squabbling over a chip. If it wasn't the MFC playing I would have turned off anyway. What I did see in the last 10 mins of the first quarter, and all of the second quarter, was this ... Hawks were first to the ball Hawks played in front On a day when the ball is sliding around and skewing off boots, of course kicks aren't going to go where they're meant to. So .... GET IN FRONT!!! We're in a era of hyper-sexualised ... (sorry, my traumatised mind was wandering to a better place) hyper-analysed and sports medicine driven training and game plans. But some things remain the same as in "the good old days". Be first to the ball Play in front You can be Sheedy, Clarkson, and Albert Einstein rolled into one package, but if your players don't do those things, you're screwed. Unbelievable that for all the talent we've got, we played like Neeld was coaching. I'm tempted to believe that his hard-man act would have got a better result yesterday.

Our shooting for goal is a footballing crime

Are you talking about the game or your "G&Ts" ?

You don't have to buy the pies. You can take your own sandwiches and a thermos.

Pro tip: stay near the dunny, it'll save time later on when you're ready to find it again.