Demonland

Forget 186. I want 190 gone.

NB: We have heard from the CEO on radio last week and via a letter to the members.

YEAR PLAYER 2001 Adem Yze 2002 Adem Yze 2003 Clint Bizzell 2004 Jeff White 2005 Travis Johnstone 2006 Cameron Bruce 2007 Nathan Jones 2008 Brad Green 2009 Aaron Davey 2010 James Frawley 2011 Jack Trengove 2012 Nathan Jones 2013 Nathan Jones 2014 Nathan Jones 2015 Jack Viney 2016 Max Gawn 2017 Clayton Oliver 2018 Clayton Oliver 2019 Max Gawn 2020 Christian Petracca 2021 Clayton Oliver 2022 Clayton Oliver 2023 Christian Petracca 2024 Max Gawn

Congratulations to Max Gawn on taking out the 2024 Demonland Player of the Year. It is his 3rd time winning this prestigious award. PLAYER VOTES 1 Max Gawn 220 2 Jack Viney 123 3 Trent Rivers 112 4 Steven May 104 5 Christian Petracca 97 6 Alex Neal-Bullen 93 7 Kysaiah Pickett 81 8 Ed Langdon 79 9 Clayton Oliver 65 10 Christian Salem 60 11 Jacob van Rooyen 58 12 Tom McDonald 55 13 Judd McVee 50 14 Jake Lever 43 15 Bayley Fritsch 32 16 Kade Chandler 30 =17 Tom Sparrow 25 =17 Caleb Windsor 25 19 Daniel Turner 22 20 Harry Petty 20 21 Jake Bowey 17 22 Blake Howes 15 23 Jack Billings 13 24 Adam Tomlinson 9 =25 Jake Melksham 2 =25 Andy Moniz-Wakefield 2

I sit huddled in near darkness, the only light coming through flickering embers in a damp fireplace, the room in total silence after the thunderstorm died. I wonder if they bothered to restart the game. No point really. It was over before it started. The team’s five star generals in defence and midfield ruled out of the fray, a few others missing in action against superior enemy firepower and too few left to fly the flag for the field marshal defiantly leading his outnumbered army into battle. One of his loyal foot soldiers, Tom McDonald deserves a medal for bravery under fire. Kade Chandler was a defiant David but faced too many Goliaths and Kozzie took one down with a football act but, as they say, the victor gets to write the story when the battle’s won, particularly if the Match Review Officer is from the same side. On the ground, no eyes on the football, plentiful fumbling, indecisive movement and little or no pressure applied on opponents. The brothers Daicos cut swathes like butter through enemy lines in the tradition of their forebear, history's greatest and most successful military commander, Alexander the Great of Macedonia. The troops they led into battle was no rogue’s army although judging by the way the crowd bayed for the blood of the mastermind of a past defeat, you would have been forgiven for thinking he was an alleged war criminal sitting in chains awaiting judgement at The Hague. Well done Collingwood. They were brilliantly coached. The purpose of cutting off the Demons’ few main remaining strengths was achieved. Sidebottom stopped Jack Viney. Max won his battle in the ruck but the combined height of their two big ruckmen was ironically a counterpoint to that advantage. Brodie Grundy sits in Sydney triumphantly mocking both sides awaiting the glory of the finals to come in a future that includes former teammates lazing in the sunshine of Ibiza or some island in the Caribbean at the very same time. It was at the 20 minute mark of the third quarter with the Magpies defending a 21 point lead, that my mind wandered to a similar stage of the Demons’ final home and away game played in an empty stadium three years ago. Melbourne stormed home that evening, willed to win by an enormous reservoir of self-belief that ended in a goal-after-the-siren victory. Melbourne had that magic ingredient in 2021; the ability to win against all odds with teeth gritted firmly, something sadly missing in 2024. No come-from-behind victories this year. As the 60th minute of our last quarter slowly ticks away, I sit here in silence wondering if they restarted the game and whether we made our comeback. MELBOURNE 1.1.7 4.4.28 7.5.47 8.9.57 COLLINGWOOD 5.4.34 8.5.53 12.8.80 15.13.103 GOALS MELBOURNE Pickett Tholstrup 2 Billings Chandler Turner van Rooyen COLLINGWOOD Cameron N Daicos Hill Lipinski 2 Allen Crisp Elliott Hoskin-Elliott Parker Richards Sidebottom BEST MELBOURNE McDonald Gawn Chandler Pickett Billings Rivers COLLINGWOOD N Daicos J Daicos Lipinski Allan Hill Sidebottom INJURIES MELBOURNE Jake Bowey (knee) COLLINGWOOD Darcy Moore (concussion) LATE CHANGES MELBOURNE Jake Lever (illness) replaced by Taj Woewodin COLLINGWOOD Nil REPORTS MELBOURNE Nil COLLINGWOOD Nil SUBSTITUTIONS MELBOURNE Bailey Laurie (replaced Jake Bowey at half-time) COLLINGWOOD Finlay Macrae (replaced Darcy Moore at half-time) UMPIRES Leigh Fisher Brett Rosebury Ray Chamberlain Simon Meredith CROWD 53,957 at the MCG

Would look good in a Dees guernsey

Which team? Too soon?

The Demonland Podcast will air LIVE on Monday, 26th August @ 7:30pm. Join Binman & I as we analyse the Demons loss at the MCG against the Magpies in the Round 24. You questions and comments are a huge part of our podcast so please post anything you want to ask or say below and we'll give you a shout out on the show. If you would like to leave us a voicemail please call 03 9016 3666 and don't worry no body answers so you don't have to talk to a human. Listen & Chat LIVE: https://demonland.com/podcast Call: 03 9016 3666 Skype: Demonland31

Captain Max Gawn leads Vice Captain Jack Viney and Trent Rivers in the Demonland Player of the Year. The injured pair of Steven May & Christian Petracca round out the Top 5. Your votes please. 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

The Dees played insipid, error riddled & uninspiring footy all night and in a lightning delayed match they eventually succumbed to Collingwood by 46 points at the MCG in the final game of the year. Thank God this season is finally over. Bring on 2025.