La Dee-vina Comedia

As I understand it, Brad Miller has been appointed, for want of a better title, as our Development Coach. Has he any specific qualifications for the role? (Note: Please do not interpret my question as implying criticism of him or those who appointed him. I'm just curious to know how an ex-player moves into this role).

Didn't Riewoldt (Nick) miss his whole first year with a knee problem? Seems to have done alright since.

I think you'll find most players say what their managers tell them to say. It's the manager's job to get the best deal for the players and encouraging a club to think a "required" player might be thinking about leaving is surely part of the manager's kitbag.

Gee, how I wish posters such as Jaded and Nasher worked in the media. Brief, eloquent and not likely to let emotion get the better of them. Demonland is all the better for their contributions (and a few others, too).

Forget the five stages of grief. The three stages of being a Melbourne Football Club supporter are much more significant. Which journo will be the first to use the expression "X straightened them up" when X (the first of Dawes/Clark/Hogan) finally plays?

While it's Gillon McLachlan's to lose, I'd like to think the AFL will undertake a robust selection process. If you were building some key selection criteria, what should they be? My suggestions: successful experience as a CEO of a multi-million dollar organisation (Jeff Kennett doesn't have this experience, by the way. Being Premier of a State is more similar to being the Chairman of a company) proven ability to manage a large budget proven political connections, preferably on both sides of politics and at the State and, to a lesser extent, at the Federal level perhaps previous involvement in the AFL, but not necessarily as a player if no involvement in the AFL, some management experience at a senior level in another sporting code proven media performance someone with at least 10 years ahead of them to work full time (this is my sensitive way of saying that the AFL should want someone in the 40s or perhaps early 50s - Old Dee, you and I need not apply) someone without a serious black mark against their name. That means no-one with a history of multiple corporate mistakes, sexual harrassment allegations or poor relationships with workforce, etc, should be in the frrame. Too much ammo for the media

I'm not sure if it's the use of italics, my poor quality screen or my even poorer eyes, but I'm struggling with the last word. Does it start with an f or a t? Not that it matters.

What about Karmichael?

I had meant that each of his steps were in the forward direction. I'm not completely negative.

I think he has taken a step each year. I'd just like each step to be bigger.

Ken Emselle taught me maths. I always thought he was a better rover than maths teacher - but that's just me deflecting my own weaknesses.

Demetriou took over as CEO in 2003. He could hardly be held accountable for the success of any specific team over the subsequent two to three years. Having said that, measuring the success of interstate v Victorian teams by looking at the teams who played in the Grand Final is a rather blunt instrument anyway.

So, who plagiarised the Chris Grant story? Jack Watts or the Melbourne PR department? Mind you, if he plays as many games as Grant and of the same quality, I'll be very happy. (If you don't know what I'm talking about, read here - para 7)

I somehow suspect Demetriou won't go far. Perhaps in a couple of years he'll become a non-executive Commissioner of the AFL. There's too much talent there which the AFL should harness. Sure, he has some weaknesses, including his dictatorial style, but the competition is in a far stronger position now than when he started. Wish I could say the same for the MFC. Well played, Andrew.

Slightly off topic, but the apparent distaste for "extract of pigs brains" may be unfair. Just ask Jack Fitzpatrick what he thinks about "extract of pig's pancreas". I accept that "extract of pig's brains" may be an unproven and even unhealthy (and possibly even an un-kosher) product. But a knee-jerk reaction just because it sounds a bit icky can be a bit short sighted.

So you'll just stay in the carpark? Like, forever?

Maybe it's purely demographic. Perhaps Melbourne supporters are less interested than supporters of other teams in purchasing branded product. Combine that with Melbourne having fewer supporters than the big teams and you'd have a reason why stores don't bother stocking stuff they just know won't sell.

Why do you say Pert's the most successful CEO? I would have thought there's an argument that Brian Cook has been more successful at Geelong; or even Cook's protege, Stuart Fox at Hawthorn.

When is he expected to start playing again?

My conclusion: One of you is friends with Craig Thompson.

Hopefully Garland's OK and able to play from the beginning of the season or not long after it starts. If this had happened at the beginning of last year we'd be contemplating Sellar, Pederson, Gillies, Davis or Watts as his replacement. I'm glad we're a year on.

Let's be more optimistic: With some luck he will be OK for the finals (I know, I'm dreaming)

I suspect like cockroaches, footy journos would still survive.

Or maybe he was just warming up his hands in the wet conditions.

It would be much more amusing if we were to find out that the Bandidos have warned Toby Mitchell to stop associating with Jake King.