Chook

Let me get this straight. You want to pay back Brock McLean for saying we intentionally lost games, and your plan for doing this is to intentionally lose a game? That'll show 'em!

The worst thing that ever happened to umpiring is the inclusion of multiple field umpires. More umpires means more diverse interpretation, which means more inconsistency. Of course the problem with only having one umpire would be that the game moves so quickly that he couldn't keep up.

So why did Tom Scully go to GWS? Why did Mitch Clark come to us? MONEY MONEY MONEY!!!

inb4tanking

It's funny. For months now, I haven't heard a word from WYL or the other hand-wringers about how free agency will be the death of the smaller clubs. I see it to be the opposite: Weaker clubs have more money to spend, so free agency actually helps them. If there were no salary cap, then there'd be a whole other story.

Extra! Extra! Read all about it: "Low-risk big man plays poor game."

Why wouldn't it be relevant? Mitch Clark's family convinced him that more money would be better for the family than returning to WA, so he took the cash.

He was just pretending.

Have you ever been really tired and twisted an ankle walking up a step or something? Getting fitter will reduce our incidence of injuries of every kind. Even impact injuries. Look at Nathan Jones; excepting the fortuitously-placed broken back at the end of one season, he's had narry a scratch, twinge or snap since his debut. It's no coincidence that he's our fittest player.

Don't we have to trade for Tippett?

Too. Right.

That's a pretty moronic thing to say. What evidence do you have to support such a baseless claim?

Yeah but we're still the only Club in the AFL whose coach has an involuntary twitch, so we win the award for "Most Stressful Club to Work At."

I couldn't give two shits about that. I just want him playing for the MFC.

You really love Hawthorn, huh?

And there shall be rejoicing in the streets until the end of our days. Does anyone have a picture?

If Melbourne's development history is anything to go by, he'll be anything from slightly worse to on the verge of being delisted.

We should pick up that Wilkes fella, if only so he doesn't destroy us every time we play St Kilda.

You mean the bit about your captain and key forward suffering an unknown knee injury throwing your side into chaos? I think that's quite a relevant point.

Maybe we'll be short on experience, but we certainly won't have lost anything when it comes to leadership. Moloney and Sylvia couldn't lead a fat kid's lunch out of a paper bag.

I was watching the replay early this morning while waiting for the athletics to come on, and I noticed at one stage in the second quarter that Stephen Milne gave away a free kick against Harry O'Brian. Then O'Brian said something to Milne which I didn't catch. Milne then retorted "What are you gonna do about it f*ckhead? What are you gonna do about it f*ckhead?" over and over again. The umpire appeared to be fine with that until O'Brian went up to him and complained. An instant later, the ump had paid a 50 m penalty, saying "that language is unacceptable." If the language was unacceptable, why in the hell did it take until O'Brian complained for the umpire to do something about it? He clearly heard what Milne said because he was close enough for the microphone to pick it up, and because Milne said it over and over again, the umpire obviously had enough time to pay the 50 before O'Brian complained. UMPIRES SHOULD NEVER ALLOW THE CROWD OR THE PLAYERS TO INFLUENCE THEIR DECISIONS. In fact, I believe that nobody other than the Captain should be allowed to address the umpires other than to ask who the free kick is for, what the free is for, where they should be standing. THAT'S IT!

What about "don't run off to the change rooms when the game's still on just because you're too much of a sook to take it all?" That's some good advice too.

Ah! Maths - the one true faith.Footy and mathematics together at last, as it should be.

I'm glad you think that way too.

The only thing Morton is good at doing is running all over the ground and standing about 3 feet off the back of the packs to pick up the quick handball. Put him here and he'll show his worth. Put him anywhere else and he may as well be in the stands.