Tarax Club

By the numbers; 6 Steven May 5 Christian Petracca 4 Christian Salem 3 Angus Brayshaw 2 Jack Viney 1 Jake Lever Honourable mentions; Jake Bowey Max Gawn Ed Langdon Jake Melksham Trent Rivers Tom Sparrow Special mention; Taj Woewodin😈 Adjudication; Down a few blokes, umpires gave the Aints the run of the green for the first three quarters. Than the gas ran out. AFL, if you're serious about improving the game demand that the people who purport to be umpires act professionally. Four umpires on the field spreads the 'talent' very thin. Broadcasters; Dumped the 'evil' Mudocs for FTA, the game commentary was pretty lame but the post-game was OK after Trac took the mic. Opposition Hyperbole Watch; The Channel 7 outside broadcast producer has an unhealthy fixation on Ross Lyon. Ad nauseam cues back to Ross grinning away in the box. Luke Darcy kept referring to how cheerful and relaxed Lyon has been since his return to saintdom. Speculation suggests Ross is getting by with "A Little Help from his Friends". From the Director's Chair; Lovely to see Goody so animated tonight and many DL's relieved we are not "Crying in the Rain".

Don't forget your life jackets!

Not claiming to be a Rhodes scholar when it comes to footy minutiae, but appears to play as as a member of the onball brigade at stoppages. Young Taj can 'intelligently' get separation from his direct opponent which allows him time and space to assist his team mates in goal scoring chains or kick goals himself. Of course in the big league everything seems faster and the collisions more frequent. Judging on last year's performances in the VFL, he has the requisite courage, took some big hits, including being infamously concussed in a dangerous act by former Casey player Lefau at Punt Rd. At Princess Park in the ultimate finale he was TMM the best of the young guns.

Jefferson V Cadman? Rev up the 5.0 Litre V8!

Young girl? Flip her with Kelli Underwood! Young bloke from the midlands ? Also quite listenable.

Learn, Learning, Lesson and now add the 's' Lessons Other derivations are simply fugazi.

Uncle I hope you were forewarned about the local welcoming committee?

Alternatively may we humbly suggest the much more soulful Ann Peebles original, " I can't stand the rain". With an eye on the weather here's our tongue and cheek homage. Greg Stafford can't stand the rain Against his forward six Bringing back sweet memories Hey forward six Do you remember How sweet it used to be? When it was all together late last September (2021) Everything was so Grand Now we're so disconnected There's just no accuracy Can't stand in the rain...

Perf '21 GF half time queue into the boy's room. An obnoxious [censored],* probably one of Max's WCE supporters impersonating MFC barrackers in Demon livery. Slurs braggingly "Go Dees" whilst spill/slopping the contents of his plastic beer cup on my person. Given the state of the match, his behaviour gets one star out of five. Cognisance zero. Its amazing what people can do to themselves on half-cut beer. Unsure why folk keep dragging the same tired old stereotypes about Collingwood supporters. My relatively recent experiences sitting amongst them, suggests otherwise. A younger educated demographic, courteous well-behaved and knowledgeable about the game.

Love the physicality he bought to the game, that crunching old fashioned 'shirtfront' he stream-rolled Hyphen-Elliot with deserved so much better than a kick in the 'behind' from Brody Grundy. Game and season highlight real stuff.

joeboy a great team performance! Goody V Flea? Our system prevailed despite the yipes.

6 Jack Viney 5 Christian Salem 4 Christian Petracca 3 Lachlan Hunter 2 Max Gawn 1 Adam Tomlinson Honourable mentions; Angus Brayshaw Bayley Fritsch Brody Grundy Steven May Alex Neal-Bullen Trent Rivers Joel Smith Tom Sparrow Adjudication; Acceptable in terms of balance, no obvious howlers, consistency of decision making still needs work. Pass mark except for Umpire Stevic, Toby Greene has my vote. Broadcaster; BT is an unimaginative partisan [censored] his true colours ‘black and white’ were to the fore during the filth’s last momentum surge. Nanthan Jones was somewhere in the mix. Opposition hyperbole watch; Mason Cox is an absolute PRAT game over and still acting like a YANK. Brayden Maynard had the good grace to be sporting in defeat. From the director’s chair; In an effort to get the goal kicking sorted, Choco’s Goal Kicking Academy will be running school holidays’ classes this bye. Final score margin flattered Collingwood massively.

Bright spots on the Casey radar appear to be another consistent performances from 'Bones' Howes, Jefferson Ford hitting the scoreboard and Andy Moniz-Wakefield's performance after a recent return from injury. That 'rainmaker' snap he kicked for goal was also accurate. Boy has some x-factor about him.

In a no horse**** move, Goody appears to be keeping Mr Ed well 'stabled' on the named interchange for the start of the King's B'Day thriller. Brayden Maynard was disappointed as there was no duck on the filth dinner menu. Brayden will be offered a serving of humble pie, cold.

Double take originally MacRobertson’s and uniquely Australian. Gone like Speedo’s to the imperialist multinational entity.

Ted Fidge v Darren Millane Light Heavyweight bout Waverley Park Round 1 1988 Ted Fidge by a one punch KO No Saint, nor an out and out thug. Ted delivered the decisive retaliatory blow, end of game for faux tough guy Darren ‘rubber legs’ Millane. Six weeks for Ted and end of his VFL career.

Tom Hafey king hit a bloke at Shepparton according to my Dad. So much for mythologising. Kevin Sheedy would be an ‘acolyte’, Dean Wallis was definitely no angel.

Rising Star indeed! Where others struggled for accuracy, young fella stepped up to the mark and showed how it is done. Beyond which was an impressive four quarter performance.

Brayden Crossley ‘the fridge’ (double door version). Former Gold Coast Sun rookie. Delisted under a cloud. An absolute monster in the flesh. The ‘Weed’ gave him the run around in the second half of last year’s VFL Grannie.

Postal vote 6 Christian Petracca 5 Steven May 4 Jake Lever 3 Jacob Van Rooyen 2 Judd McVee 1 Angus Brayshaw Honourable mentions; Max Gawn Edward Langdon Lachlan Hunter Kade Chandler Christian Salem Jack Viney From the director’s chair; Demon’s inaccuracy flattered the navy blues who were really a whiter shade of pale (vanilla). Melbourne’s performance is decidedly on the up; all ground team defence ✅, back six ✅, centre bounces - ball ups - ball ins ✅, i50’s improving, goal kicks radar askew awaiting imminent re-alignment. Adjudication; Carlton 22 - Dees 13 free kicks. Demand recount of actual bluebaggers on field. 18+4 = soft as butter. For example Carlton back lowering head before going into a tackle is dangerous and definitely deserves holding the ball. The case for the righteous now rests. Auskick guys would have done better 💡. Broadcasters; Don’t give a rats! Attended game at ‘G. Channel 7, Foxtel and Kayo et al mercifully in absentia. Game wasn’t an overhyped goat. But go home now confident the team is a well positioned contender.

joeboy, if Mark Twain could be invoked given ‘there are lies, damm lies and statistics’. We have taken the liberty of getting the Hoover out of the Demonland broom closet and run a fact check over some of your 3 word summations. Brayshaw - horrible until last Chandler - had minimal impact Neal Bullen - little involvement again Pickett - continued poor season Spargo - some minor involvement Total tackles by team 54 Contribution by the ‘quintet’ 20 etc Statistically the contribution by the quintet would be significant. On %’s alone. % of team tackles 37% i50 18% Round off contested possessions 15% Not claiming a sophisticated analysis but remove the quintets’ contributions we struggle to win. Of course plenty of room for improvement as with most of the team’s performance.

Smart coaching Curnow had no real influence and was well blanketed by May. McKay is no match winner on that performance. Jake Lever got some of his mojo back.

Jack had more form.

The mantra of rewarding consistent performance at Casey has belatedly been given the green light with the selection of Adam Tomlinson. Jake was pleased with the decision to put the band back together. Lever can now breathe easier with the spotlight moved elsewhere. There is a SOS out on Joel Smith to keep body sound, channel Sean by replicating that recent terrific grab at Casey against North and be a functional forward. A collective sigh of relief will be heard at the ‘G prequel to the King’s B day Big Freeze. If #29 succeeds it will a mission complete. Lachie Hunter has recently been nominated for membership of the exclusive Whipping Boy club by ‘supportive’ demonland posters. He appears destined to move up the poster boy ladder as the season progresses. Jack Watts position at the top of the ladder does not appear to be under threat at this stage.

DEMONS TO DEAL WITH THIS BUNCH OF WALLYS!!!