Bitter but optimistic

Well ..no. I'm figuring the hipster bosom would be a tad sweaty from bike riding or jogging the tan, so Earl's sheilas will get really excited over the manly odour of a randy alpaca who has just stomped a fox to death.

Let us hope your agility continues Earl. This little piece of arcane information may assist you in that regard. Hatchet Man - "late 19th century (originally US): figuratively, from an early use denoting a hired Chinese assassin" BTW Earl if you think any of the Hood female household needs a safe refuge during your difficult times, your ever reliable Uncle Bitter will welcome them into the bosom of Romsey Manor.

I imagine you have a number and variety of such ..... er "devices" picket!

Well what a [censored] disaster the footy was!! Your poor (now poorer) old Uncle Bitter was very confident of a win and, consequently, put a shiteload on the dees. Thankfully, I watched the disaster unfold from The Manor but at certain moments had temper issues and threw objects!! Well that caused mayhem - The Lads scattered, the dog [censored] on the floor and my missiles ( cans) damaged the walls. The squeeze is really [censored] off and it is likely that your uncle will be denied any er...... relationship pleasures for some considerable time. The only thing that would cheer me now is another's misfortune. Something along the lines of dc getting the pox or picket breaking a leg

Rather decadent for a planet saver I would have thought!

Well I'm sure you'll enjoy your own company this afternoon and your, no doubt, humble accommodation picket! However, we of the genteel class have far more refined tastes than you simple peons. Perhaps one day I shall send you photographs of the magnificent Manor. PS. Would you have attended today if Clarrie Choo Choo got a gig?

No, I have given up on Shitiad and will be viewing proceedings from Romsey Manor. Strange you should mention Moonie, as I have reliable information that he is spending the weekend at a snow resort. Apparently a Greeny slush fund was raided and Monnie and his latte sipping mates are snogging away at the apres ski. My friendship with Stu has been something of a letdown as the promised tickets to the corporate booth have not been forthcoming.

You attending dc?

You've risen early dc!! No overly strenuous activities last night? Or should that be "twice risen"?

Hey Biffen where do reckon dc tells those high society sheilas he lives? No one trying to impress would admit to Borewood. I'm guessing Mont Albert.

I'm sure they are honest hardworking people. Pass it on to picket dc .

Same happened on my computer dc - must be one of picket's porn sites.

"Deconstructed latte" !!!!!!!! Now I'm certain the world has gone mad.

At the risk of offending my former benefactor Earl Hood - hipsters fall into any undesirable category you can imagine dc. BTW - I guess hipsters are shot on site in Borewood?

Richard Wagner I presume.

An excellent observation.You have cut to the heart of the matter bb!!

With a dash of cinnamon I'm guessing.

And people accuse me of having a bizarre lifestyle!!!! I wonder if any Demonlanders do this thing? ( Would even Moonie be silly enough?) Maybe Stuie has a Bible based version where one hunts down the beast that wears 666 I would appreciate further information on this matter.

Apparently my grip on reality (no vulgar quips please) has finally totally gone. Someone was trying to explain to me that people are actually wandering our fair city trying to capture imaginary creatures with their phones. Tell me it isn't so.

EErrrrr yes of course Earl. You know my record keeping is meticulous , however, it was the floods ...... yes that's it .. the floods. Lost the lot unfortunately. I'll settle for another $5000 and call it quits.

Don't know how that "s" got in there!

Actually I have chased down dc's avian alter ego - Satyr tragopan (Tragopan satyra) Humans may joke about getting the horn, but the male satyr tragopan actually grows a pair. They’re electric blue, inflatable, and form a matching set with the bird’s brightly patterned, retractable, bib-like throat lappet. The male brandishes this wacky trio of now-you-see-them-now-you-don’t ornaments during a spectacular courtship display that is rooted heavily in the principle of ‘shock and awe’.

A rooster?

Two more albatrosses around my neck - FMD, as if I don't have enough problems in my life!!!

Crikey where is everyone??????