Skuit

You don't have to tell us outright Deestar - just pick a number from one to three. Jayden has: 1) a bout of salmonella from a carton of unpasturised Nippys? 2) contracted chlamydiosis from a tawny frogmouth? 3) been suffering itchy-scalp syndrome from excessive head-band use?

No, it's not true. We've won two games in the Territory in just the past two years.

There's some talk of us starting to shape as a destination club. This is all good. But what's more exciting is that there's evidence that we're now perhaps considered a Rookie destination club with a strong development programme and clear pathway as demonstrated by Maynard and Smith. It's great if everyone in the AFL wants to come to us, but we will still need to pay for them and juggle the cap - so it's even better if we can keep getting first dibs on potential top-line young talent for free.

Also, on the broad subject of incestualism (Collingwood supporters), I had separate boyhood crushes on both mother and father growing up as a sporting lad in the 80s. Makes for supporting Austin now a little bit awkward - although I certainly wouldn't have chosen the name Austin for our fantasy spawn back then. Phileas Provis perhaps, or maybe Bradbury Bradkte (hint: I also liked fantasy sci-fi as a kid).

Collingwood supporters generally cry into their porridge rather than cornflakes. It's a dental thing.

Thanks fellas. This hadn't occurred to me at all. On another absolutely completely unrelated note, is there any chance we can add a tongue-in-cheek Demon emoticon @Demonland?

Kent will play in the bye week? Perfect conditions for him with the opposition at home with their feet up playing Playstation. I hope he kicks 3000 goals. No excuses.

Jamie Bennell played once in Darwin and had played every game of the season up until that point.

Champion data is getting a bit creepy. I'm not sure how they've obtained a data set on a player's neurological mind-state. Unless Saty is somehow involved.

You'd think de Goey would be a better fit with West Coast.

http://www.afl.com.au/news/2018-05-21/dees-will-back-up-lever-if-reunion-gets-nasty Looking forward to seeing Oscar get in there to defend Jake if the Crows are being mean.

Radar was out at the start of the season after running hot in the AFLX and a post-bye return of 21.4 last year. Rounds 1-4: 0.7 Rounds 5-9: 12.4 Confidence has to play a part. @Nasher may also note that his minutes were being managed at the start of the year. And while I'm a Goodwin fan it's hard to give full credit to the coach for identifying Milkshake's HFF potential - just about our whole roster has been tried through there now.

I wasn't around for the Robbie Flower royal blue days but felt there was something familiar about our new away colour scheme. It wasn't until the final quarter on the weekend when it finally clicked: Max Gawn congratulates Charlie Spargo on his debut The Demons celebrate another win with recruit Oscar Baker Clayton Oliver releases a trade-mark hand-pass

Pretty straight forward Coaches' votes this week: CARLTON v MELBOURNE 10 Jake Melksham (Melb) 8 Tom McDonald (Melb) 6 Nathan Jones (Melb) 2 Max Gawn (Melb) 2 Jake Lever (Melb) 1 Patrick Cripps (Carl) 1 Alex Neal-Bullen (Melb)

Brayshaw's helmet will certainly get uncomfortable with all that sweaty heat trapped under there. And who knows if it even prevents concussions? I wish there was somewhere I could read a discussion on the topic.

The progressive expressions on Rodan's face throughout the third quarter onslaught are priceless: can't believe I had to play for this same mob in 2013.

Credit it where credit is due then - Eddie working in his favourite cliche during a discussion on Melbourne fans maybe having to reconsider their late-season holidays - just as ANB piles on another goal: A nil-Buller in favour of Neil-Bullen August. I'm certain it came out of his mouth before he was even conscious of it.

I was meaning to update a couple weeks back so it's not just a fair-weather bump - but I do hope others can help to keep the numbers fresh and add their own bits and pieces when they come across them. Anyway, at the end of Round 9: Scoring: 1st Scoring 1st Inside-50s 1st Inside-50 (Differential) Intensity 1st Contested 1st Contested Differential (by a huge margin) 2nd Clearances (1st Center - 3rd Differential) 3rd Tackles (3rd Most Tackles Against) 5th Tackles i50 4th poorest D/E% against/most Turnovers Against/most Clangers Against 3rd (!) Contested Marks! (6th least Contested Marks Against) Space/Territory 1st Least Kicks Against 1st Least Marks Against 1st Marks i50 3rd Metres Gained (2nd Differential) 4th Intercepts (2nd Differential) 2nd Least i50s Against 17th Rebound-50s 18th Bounces Notes - again, most of the stats are telling us exactly what we're seeing - although I don't think we're entirely appreciating the extent of our various multiple areas of dominance (possibly because we're still not consistently and fully capitalising on-field). We're top-notch at the coal-face stuff but we're also forcing the opposition to play our close-in game - i.e high tackles against. We're also putting a lot of pressure on the carrier and it's telling in the opposition turnover/DE%/clanger stats as well as the least kicks against figure. And we're smashing the territorial battle. The big surprise for me is in our continued contested marks statistics - a huge improvement on last year, and we've also properly balanced our kick/handball disposal ratios - another common grizzle from last year. The most pleasing thing for me - we're doing all the hard stuff and proving a dynamic forward threat. If I had to build a team game from scratch from a fan perspective, and could choose aspects of dominance by compromising in other areas, I would probably take contested/high-scoring/forward territory over high possessions and DE%. The Roos to Goody transition may have been an unintended masterstroke. We're both a hard and attacking football team in an aggressive and pressurised modern era. But disregarding my own personal footy fan-boy preferences - is this the formula for success? Manic, contested footy, a high-press, and thrusting the ball forward as the first priority?

So after succumbing to our strange 40 point roadblock again for two weeks in a row this month, we seem to have broken the hoodoo and kicked on with it in the past two consecutive weeks. Coincidence? Irrelevant? Turning point? For me, there has been an obvious intent within the team to do so in these past two weeks, and some of the language coming out of the club suggests that it's an area which has been addressed. Does this put to rest the question re. our potentially unsustainable game-style - or is it something which requires a longer-term measure? Will we be able to crush better teams when we dominate (such as Adelaide last year?) vs. Essendon 43 points (4th Qtr 9.10 mins) 48 points (19.29) 36 points (Final) vs. St Kilda 43 points (3rd Qtr 25.5 mins) 48 points (4th Qtr 4.18) 39 points (Final) ....................................... vs. Gold Coast 38 points (4th Qtr 7.1 mins) 69 points (Final) vs. Carlton 37 points (3rd Qtr 0.34 mins) 73 points (4th Qtr 4.15 mins) 109 points (Final)

Regardless of the MRP, Bernie should still have a case to answer for dabbing a kick inboard from the defensive pocket to a one-on-two 40m out straight in front. I saw it all unfold before it even happened and I'm no prophet.

Match summary: See 2004

'Best' is super ambiguous, 'best team' more so - but I'm afraid that by just about whichever way you want to swing it, our great white hope in Jesse Hogan wouldn't be in the team. Can you say 'great white hope' anymore? I presume not.

As an aside, I live in Europe and have travelled a fair bit in my time. The vast majority of people I speak to overseas, from every corner of every continent, have derived most of their cultural understanding of Australia from Masterchef. And forget official figures - go on an illegal streaming site and you'll often see the show among the 'popular' content. This show is simply huge. For the most part these people will probably never care much about football. But in terms of international exposure, this is a massive coup - in fact, I can't think of a single, promotional effort that could bring as much widespread attention to our football club - especially one as easy and inexpensive as this. Masterstroke.

83 inside-50s seems like a reasonable number of opportunities.