Demonland

150 YEARS ON - THE ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATIONS by the Demonland Crew There have been very few highlights for the Melbourne Football Club as it celebrates its 150th year but last month's big anniversary bash to celebrate 150 Heroes of the MFC and attended by over 1,300 supporters at Crown Casino was certainly one of them. The evening was universally considered by the attendees as one of the best football functions ever and a real tribute the hard work of outgoing President Paul Gardner. Here are some of the highlights taken from newspaper reports of the event – mostly from the Melbourne Age: Paul Gardner: "Welcome to the first and only 150th birthday party ever celebrated by a sporting organization anywhere In the world," was Gardner’s introduction pointing out that the Melbourne Football Club was older than Manchester United by 20 years, the New York Yankees by 43 years, Real Madrid by 44 years, and came into existence 24 years before the Ashes legend was born. "In 1858, we'd never heard of Ned Kelly, Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin... or Collingwood. They were called the good old days for some reason," Former captain Garry Lyon reminisced about his early recruiting trips with club recruiter (and now Fremantle CEO) Cameron Schwab: "We'd take them out to the pub and get them as pissed as we possibly could. I've never been more sure of signing a bloke than when we signed Earl Spalding. He sat back and drank both Schwabby and I under the table. I looked across and said, 'I reckon we've got him, Schwabby'. That was my introduction." Lyon also recalled a pre-season camp on the Mornington Peninsula when he was just 16 years of age. One night after a training session the senior players, including coach Ron Barassi, went to the pub 'and wreaked all sorts of havoc' but Lyon, was too young for such things and was therefore confined to his hut from 8.00pm. Around about 3.30 next morning he was asleep when "this bloke with a bad case of Bundy-itis stumbled over three or four of us and climbed into bed with me. I panicked and 1 just rolled out on the floor. I woke up the next. day and looked and it was Ronald Dale Barassi. I'd not spoken to Barassi at this stage. He looked at me with that snarly look, and he said, You've seen nothing, son.' I said, Yes, right, Barassi." Football operations manager Chris Connolly paid tribute to his former team mate Jim Stynes, the Brownlow medallist, four-time best and fairest and now MFC Chairman. Connolly: "He looked more like a goal stick than an AFL footballer. He could run like Forrest Gump and we found out he had a heart as big as the MCG. In 150 years of Australian, rules football, the Jim Stynes story is arguably " the greatest" Robbie Flower (who got a standing ovation) said he was only 70 kilograms when he arrived at the club:" They said, 'Go to the gym', and I said, The only Jim I know is my brother." Flower also told of the drama associated with the now famous 1987 last-game finish, when Melbourne won at the Western Oval to reach the finals for the first time since 1964. The Dees needed Hawthorn to beat Geelong, too, and, according to Flower, John Sell, the team manager, told the players a "little white lie" at three-quarter-time, that Hawthorn was smashing Geelong. The Demons went on and won the game but, explained Flower: "Little did we know that down at Geelong, Hawthorn needed (Jason) Dunstall to kick the last goal. As we were running off the ground, people were huddled around radios around the ground trying to get the scores. When the result came through, to me, that was definitely the greatest thrill I had in football," A couple of highlights in a night of highlights was the auction of famous player’s framed jumpers which raised a much needed almost $100,000.00, the video presentations and particularly an emotional retelling by champion Ron Barassi of his trip to his father’s war grave in North Africa and the unveiling of the club’s 150 Heroes. Here they are: Jim Abernethy Frank Adams Bill Allen Stan Alves Syd Anderson Tony Anderson Lance Arnold Ron Baggott Gary Baker Harold Ball Ron Barassi (Jnr) Percy Beames John Beckwith George Bickford Ray Biffin Barry Bourke Harry Brereton Cameron Bruce Keith Carroll Geoff Case Albert Chadwick Noel Clarke Geoff Collins Jack Collins Chris Connolly Bob Corbett Denis Cordner Don Cordner Ted Cordner Vin Coutie Harry Coy Jimmy Davidson Frank Davis Ross Dillon Carl Ditterich Brian Dixon Len Dockett Adrian Dullard Hugh Dunbar Richard Emselle Fred Fanning Jeff Farmer Matthew Febey Steven Febey Dick Fenton-Smith Rowley Fischer Robert Flower Laurie Fowler Maurie Gibb Peter Giles Terry G.Gleeson Brad Green Rod Grinter George Haines Gary Hardeman Henry Harrison Gerard Healy Greg Healy Dick Hingston Paul Hopgood Danny Hughes Anthony Ingerson Eddie Jackson Alan Johnson Bob Johnson (Snr) Bob Johnson (Jnr) Bob 'Tassie' Johnson Trevor Johnson Travis Johnstone Gordon Jones Les Jones Bryan Kenneally Allan La Fontaine Clyde Laidlaw Frank Langley John Leith Andrew Leoncelli Charlie Lilley Wally Lock Harry Long John Lord Andy Lovell Brett Lovett Glenn Lovett Garry Lyon Hassa Mann George Margitich Peter Marquis Bernie Massey Anthony McDonald James McDonald Fred McGinis JP 'Shane' McGrath Bob McKenzie Col McLean Ian McLean Noel McMahen Ken Melville Laurie Mithen Peter Moore Jack Mueller David Neitz Stephen Newport Jack O'Keefe Andrew Obst Gordon Ogden Greg Parke AM 'Joe' Pearce Jack Purse Ian Ridley Guy Rigoni Frank Roberts Russell Robertson Alby Rodda Brian 'Doc' Roet Peter Rohde Alan Rowarth David Schwarz Norm Smith Steven Smith Earl Spalding Stuart Spencer Charlie Streeter Steven Stretch Jim Stynes Tony Sullivan Dick Taylor Ted Thomas Ian Thorogood Stephen Tingay John Townsend Keith 'Bluey' Truscott Geoff Tunbridge Bill Tymms Barrie Vagg Frank 'Pop' Vine Todd Viney Ivor Warne-Smith Ray Wartman Athol Webb Greg Wells Jeff White Sean Wight Don Williams Brian Wilson Stan Wittman Shane Woewodin Graeme Yeats Charlie Young Adem Yze. The 150 Heroes Night cost supporters up to $500.00 to attend but the real anniversary is today and there's a party to celebrate it tomorrow nightwhich might be a little more affordable. You too can attend this birthday bash as below (although we doubt whether it's an official club function proceeds go to the club):

by Ice Station Zebra Sandringham's slump continued as it suffered yet another defeat at windswept Austar arena on Sunday. However, this time the 16 point loss to in form side North Ballarat was a performance that was not only full of grit and endeavour but also showed signs that the team might have turned the corner at last. The undermanned Zebras took on a side that demolished competition leader Williamstown just one week earlier at the same inhospitable venue for visiting teams and to the tune of 47 points. After a poor first quarter full of costly skill errors and turnovers, they outscored the Roosters for the remainder of the game and did well to get to within two goals close to the end. Sandringham came into the game with a long list of injured and unavailable players (stretching well into the teens if you include the injured Demon list players who might otherwise have been eligible to play) that included the competition's leading goal kicker Nick Sautner and clever forward Ezra Poyas. Adam Yze was a late withdrawal leaving the team light on for experience and class in the attacking half. The Zebras were greeted by typical cold and windy conditions for central Victoria and again started slowly with North Ballarat scoring the first major inside the first thirty seconds of the game. Youngsters Jake Williams, Andrew McConnell and James Frawley were good early but by the first change they trailed badly having not scored a goal while the Roosters already had four. Zebra fans who had braved the elements to arrive early for the reserves game had to wait until the second quarter of the main game to witness a Sandy goal for the day. They finally were rewarded as their team lifted and got itself back into the game. Rod Crowe went into the midfield and gave the side some much need grunt, John Meesen and Jake Spencer were getting on top in the ruck, Chad Liddell was solid across half back and Peter Summers was getting his hands on the ball. With Michael Newton marking well up forward, the team was acquitting itself so much better although some occasional lapses in discipline and skill errors proved costly. The third quarter saw Sandringham really start to assert itself onto the contest with Crowe and Biddlecombe changing on ball and providing some much needed body pressure on the opposition. Addam Maric stepped up and kicked a couple of valuable goals up forward while Newton was still proving a handful for the Roosters defence. The Zebras kicked the last three goals of the quarter to have a real belief in their winning chances at ¾ time. For the second week in a row, the Zebras were called upon to lift in the final quarter and they answered the call in an action packed thirty minutes during which time they seemingly had all the momentum but fell short again for the second week in a row. Newton and Maric continued to look dangerous up forward and youngster Daniel Gribbin did some good things along half forward. Ricky Petterd and Daniel Bell started to run out of defence and Liddell showed strength at half back but playing catch up football took its toll in the end and they just couldn’t get over the line. The upshot of four successive defeats has been a dramatic fall from a top four berth to a battle to remain in the finals. Sandy now sits in eighth place with a tough home game next Saturday against ladder leader Williamstown at Trevor Barker Beach Oval. HOW THE DEMONS FARED Daniel Bell - an average game from Bell who needed to do more to win consideration for promotion to the AFL. Nathan Carroll - looked a treat with his new almost fully shaven hair style and played a reasonable game in defence with one or two of the odd clangers to keep things interesting. Moved forward in the last quarter and kicked a lovely goal from a long way out. james Frawley - one of his team's better players at centre half back, particularly early on when the team was under immense pressure. Learning and improving. Addam Maric - not only did he kick three goals but was also very lively and constantly represented danger for the North Ballarat defence. Working harder defensively, uses the ball really well. Managed the goal of the day from the forward pocket on the turn and adjusting for the wind. Tom McNamara - after making a good start, McNamara drifted out of the game but always worked hard. As the youngest member of the team, he should be given plenty of time to develop. John Meesen - had a poor day in the ruck and was well beaten. Michael Newton - kicked four goals and it could easily have been more but the conditions were not good for forwards. He took some good contested marks but was also a little undisciplined at times. I hate using this cliche but he really needs to go back to basics and try to keep things simple. Ricky Petterd - still being nursed through his comeback after injury but he got plenty of the ball and disposed of it reasonably well with one pass to Newton for a goal a real standout. Jake Spencer - the better of the two Demon ruckman, he is enthusiastic and learning the game although one clanger in defence was particularly costly. Still a work in progress and like all big men, needs time. Sandringham 0.1.1 3.3.21 7.6.48 10.10.70 North Ballarat 4.4.28 6.9.45 10.12.72 12.14.86 Goals Sandringham Newton 4 Maric 3 Martyn 2 Carroll North Ballarat Driscoll 4 Wundke 2 Chester Goodes Greig Grima Lower Searl Best Sandringham Crowe Biddlecombe Williams C Liddell Frawley McConnell North Ballarat Sansbury Sharkey Grima Sewell Driscoll Greig With so many of their number called upon for duty in the senior team, the third placed reserves were outclassed by North Ballarat and failed to score a single goal on their way to an 11 defeat. They had only 20 players and were attempting to rotate some players coming back from injury so it was always going to be a difficult battle. Tomi Johnston was the team's best and Maddison Hardiman and Michael Curcio battled the game out strongly. Jack Grimes was again impressive but he lacked support. The result was almost as bad as it can get although the Reserves did score a meagre 1.1.7 in the corresponding game in 2006. HOW THE DEMONS FARED Jack Grimes - is working his way back into the game after a long absence and was therefore rotated on and off throughout the game. He picked up a lot of possessions, looked pretty classy with his disposal and decision making and was one of Sandy's best on a dismal day. Isaac Weetra - struggled all day and, at one stage, missed a simple opportunity to kick his team's only goal. Sandringham 0.2.2 0.4.4 0.7.7 0.9.9 North Ballarat 2.3.15 4.7.31 8.7.55 11.9.75 Goals North Ballarat Dignan Horbury McHugh 2 Bell Dickinson Micallef Peace Seddon Best Sandringham Johnston Hardiman Curcio Grimes Calder Hine North Ballarat Murnane McHugh Tickner Garlett Seddon Owen

ZEBRAS GETTING CLOSER by Ice Station Zebra Sandringham's slump continued as it suffered yet another defeat at windswept Austar arena on Sunday. However, this time the 16 point loss to in form side North Ballarat was a performance that was not only full of grit and endeavour but also showed signs that the team might have turned the corner at last. The undermanned Zebras took on a side that demolished competition leader Williamstown just one week earlier at the same inhospitable venue for visiting teams and to the tune of 47 points. After a poor first quarter full of costly skill errors and turnovers, they outscored the Roosters for the remainder of the game and did well to get to within two goals close to the end. Sandringham came into the game with a long list of injured and unavailable players (stretching well into the teens if you include the injured Demon list players who might otherwise have been eligible to play) that included the competition's leading goal kicker Nick Sautner and clever forward Ezra Poyas. Adam Yze was a late withdrawal leaving the team light on for experience and class in the attacking half. The Zebras were greeted by typical cold and windy conditions for central Victoria and again started slowly with North Ballarat scoring the first major inside the first thirty seconds of the game. Youngsters Jake Williams, Andrew McConnell and James Frawley were good early but by the first change they trailed badly having not scored a goal while the Roosters already had four. Zebra fans who had braved the elements to arrive early for the reserves game had to wait until the second quarter of the main game to witness a Sandy goal for the day. They finally were rewarded as their team lifted and got itself back into the game. Rod Crowe went into the midfield and gave the side some much need grunt, John Meesen and Jake Spencer were getting on top in the ruck, Chad Liddell was solid across half back and Peter Summers was getting his hands on the ball. With Michael Newton marking well up forward, the team was acquitting itself so much better although some occasional lapses in discipline and skill errors proved costly. The third quarter saw Sandringham really start to assert itself onto the contest with Crowe and Biddlecombe changing on ball and providing some much needed body pressure on the opposition. Addam Maric stepped up and kicked a couple of valuable goals up forward while Newton was still proving a handful for the Roosters defence. The Zebras kicked the last three goals of the quarter to have a real belief in their winning chances at ¾ time. For the second week in a row, the Zebras were called upon to lift in the final quarter and they answered the call in an action packed thirty minutes during which time they seemingly had all the momentum but fell short again for the second week in a row. Newton and Maric continued to look dangerous up forward and youngster Daniel Gribbin did some good things along half forward. Ricky Petterd and Daniel Bell started to run out of defence and Liddell showed strength at half back but playing catch up football took its toll in the end and they just couldn’t get over the line. The upshot of four successive defeats has been a dramatic fall from a top four berth to a battle to remain in the finals. Sandy now sits in eighth place with a tough home game next Saturday against ladder leader Williamstown at Trevor Barker Beach Oval. HOW THE DEMONS FARED Daniel Bell - an average game from Bell who needed to do more to win consideration for promotion to the AFL. Nathan Carroll - looked a treat with his new almost fully shaven hair style and played a reasonable game in defence with one or two of the odd clangers to keep things interesting. Moved forward in the last quarter and kicked a lovely goal from a long way out. james Frawley - one of his team's better players at centre half back, particularly early on when the team was under immense pressure. Learning and improving. Addam Maric - not only did he kick three goals but was also very lively and constantly represented danger for the North Ballarat defence. Working harder defensively, uses the ball really well. Managed the goal of the day from the forward pocket on the turn and adjusting for the wind. Tom McNamara - after making a good start, McNamara drifted out of the game but always worked hard. As the youngest member of the team, he should be given plenty of time to develop. John Meesen - had a poor day in the ruck and was well beaten. Michael Newton - kicked four goals and it could easily have been more but the conditions were not good for forwards. He took some good contested marks but was also a little undisciplined at times. I hate using this cliche but he really needs to go back to basics and try to keep things simple. Ricky Petterd - still being nursed through his comeback after injury but he got plenty of the ball and disposed of it reasonably well with one pass to Newton for a goal a real standout. Jake Spencer - the better of the two Demon ruckman, he is enthusiastic and learning the game although one clanger in defence was particularly costly. Still a work in progress and like all big men, needs time. Sandringham 0.1.1 3.3.21 7.6.48 10.10.70 North Ballarat 4.4.28 6.9.45 10.12.72 12.14.86 Goals Sandringham Newton 4 Maric 3 Martyn 2 Carroll North Ballarat Driscoll 4 Wundke 2 Chester Goodes Greig Grima Lower Searl Best Sandringham Crowe Biddlecombe Williams C Liddell Frawley McConnell North Ballarat Sansbury Sharkey Grima Sewell Driscoll Greig With so many of their number called upon for duty in the senior team, the third placed reserves were outclassed by North Ballarat and failed to score a single goal on their way to an 11 defeat. They had only 20 players and were attempting to rotate some players coming back from injury so it was always going to be a difficult battle. Tomi Johnston was the team's best and Maddison Hardiman and Michael Curcio battled the game out strongly. Jack Grimes was again impressive but he lacked support. The result was almost as bad as it can get although the Reserves did score a meagre 1.1.7 in the corresponding game in 2006. HOW THE DEMONS FARED Jack Grimes - is working his way back into the game after a long absence and was therefore rotated on and off throughout the game. He picked up a lot of possessions, looked pretty classy with his disposal and decision making and was one of Sandy's best on a dismal day. Isaac Weetra - struggled all day and, at one stage, missed a simple opportunity to kick his team's only goal. Sandringham 0.2.2 0.4.4 0.7.7 0.9.9 North Ballarat 2.3.15 4.7.31 8.7.55 11.9.75 Goals North Ballarat Dignan Horbury McHugh 2 Bell Dickinson Micallef Peace Seddon Best Sandringham Johnston Hardiman Curcio Grimes Calder Hine North Ballarat Murnane McHugh Tickner Garlett Seddon Owen

by Whispering Jack For the first time since the start of the 2008 season, TAB Sportsbet has a team other than Melbourne installed as favourite for the wooden spoon. This would, in itself, normally be unremarkable but for the fact that the memory of the Demons' horrific start to the season sits freshly at the forefront of our minds. They have come a long way from the dark place where they opened proceedings losing in successive weeks by an aggregate of 199 points to end up three months later beating a top four aspirant – albeit by a single point in a game that never quite hit any high spots in terms of playing standards. Of course, it's not really the end but merely the beginning of a long journey embarked upon by a young side whose number counts not a single member who played at this elite level in the 20th century. The team's four most senior players – Brad Green, Paul Wheatley, Matthew Whelan and Cameron Bruce were all drafted in 1999 AFL National Draft and all made their debut in Melbourne's grand final year of 2000. Of the four, only Green managed to get a taste of playing in the season's ultimate contest and even that was a brief taste. Today, these players are at the forefront of a new era for the Melbourne Football Club. During the week before the Brisbane game at the MCG, the club announced a new leadership group, then promptly dropped experienced ruck stalwart Jeff White to Sandringham and omitted another 30 plus year old in James McDonald due to injury. David Neitz, Adem Yze, Russell Robertson, Nathan Carroll and Ben Holland were others who were there at the start of the year but missing from the team along with the injured Jared Rivers and Brent Moloney. In ringing in these latest changes, coach Dean Bailey warned supporters not to expect "a quick fix." Welcome to the slow fix then! The majority of the team that played against the Brisbane Lions came well within the guidelines established by Bailey before the season when he proclaimed that he was in the business of building a team with the emphasis on players 23 years of age and less. And so the football world saw youth pitted against a Leigh Matthews coached Brisbane Lions who were aiming for a top four slot and immediately pronounced Melbourne dead and buried for the week at least. However, as was the case with Mark Twain, the news of the Demons' demise was greatly exaggerated. It was Melbourne that came out with a sense of purpose and attacked the ball with aggression and a single-minded desire to win and suddenly, the game was not going according to script. Melbourne held firm to half time, saw off a few challenges in the third term and even when things looked grim as Brisbane twice stormed to a lead late in the game, they were able to muster up enough inner strength to fight back and regain the lead. The win was a real team effort but veterans like Green and Wheatley had an enormous say in the result as did the often maligned Brad Miller who demonstrated why the club’s faith and was well placed when he was included in the leadership group earlier this season. His great pack mark and goal late in the game gave his team the lead and the win but his three first quarter goals provided the spark to start the run to victory. There were several memorable moments and inspirational efforts like Paul Johnson's running down of Justin Sherman, Aussie's goal sense, Chris Johnson's coming of age, Lynden Dunn's tagging of Simon Black, Colin Sylvia rising to dangerous up forward and Colin Garland's dashes out of defence. Even Stefan Martin's subdued debut was the stuff of fairy tales. Two years ago he decided to give up a budding career as an potential international basketballer to have a kick with his mates at Old Haileybury Under 19's. Now, he's a fully fledged AFL footballer and has a VCE ENTER score of 99.75 which is only slightly lower than his winning percentage of AFL games played. Much was said after the game of Brisbane needlessly conceding free kicks through an interchange error and because its physio was in the wrong place at the wrong time and the point that wasn’t but all that ignores the fact that the Lions were gifted a few simple goals courtesy of some dodgy umpiring decisions. We all know by now that it’s asking too much to expect the men who make the decisions to be consistent. We can't expect a young team to be consistent either for that matter. There will be good days and there will be bad as the remainder of the season unfolds. Whatever the case, the future is looking brighter than it did three months ago and it will be brighter in three months and three year's time. There are five more young men waiting in the wings (three of them All Australian Under 18's playing at Sandringham where Cale Morton has averaged 30 touches a game for the past fortnight) and a good draft position looms at the end of the year. Our time is coming - it's just that the fix is a slow one and we need to be patient in order to savour more wins like Sunday against the Brisbane Lions. Melbourne 5.4.34 6.6.42 9.8.62 14.9.93 Brisbane Lions 2.3.15 5.9.39 7.12.54 13.14.92 Goals Melbourne Miller Sylvia 4 Bruce Wonaeamirri 2 Bate Green Brisbane Lions Brown 5 Bradshaw 4 Hooper 2 Patfull Rischitelli Best Melbourne Green Wheatley Miller C Johnson Sylvia Jones Garland Brisbane Lions Power Brown Rischitelli Black Hooper McGrath Injuries Melbourne McLean (ankle) Brisbane Lions Nil Umpires Head Armstrong Jeffery Reports Nil Changes Melbourne Nil Brisbane Lions Johnstone (hamstring) replaced by Polkinghorne Crowd 23,278 at MCG VIDEO HIGHLIGHTS: Q1 MELBOURNE v BRISBANE LIONS Q2 MELBOURNE v BRISBANE LIONS Q3 MELBOURNE v BRISBANE LIONS Q4 MELBOURNE v BRISBANE LIONS MELBOURNE V BRISBANE LIONS FINAL MINUTES

by Whispering Jack For the first time since the start of the 2008 season, TAB Sportsbet has a team other than Melbourne installed as favourite for the wooden spoon. This would, in itself, normally be unremarkable but for the fact that the memory of the Demons' horrific start to the season sits freshly at the forefront of our minds. They have come a long way from the dark place where they opened proceedings losing in successive weeks by an aggregate of 199 points to end up three months later beating a top four aspirant – albeit by a single point in a game that never quite hit any high spots in terms of playing standards. Of course, it's not really the end but merely the beginning of a long journey embarked upon by a young side whose number counts not a single member who played at this elite level in the 20th century. The team's four most senior players – Brad Green, Paul Wheatley, Matthew Whelan and Cameron Bruce were all drafted in 1999 AFL National Draft and all made their debut in Melbourne's grand final year of 2000. Of the four, only Green managed to get a taste of playing in the season's ultimate contest and even that was a brief taste. Today, these players are at the forefront of a new era for the Melbourne Football Club. During the week before the Brisbane game at the MCG, the club announced a new leadership group, then promptly dropped experienced ruck stalwart Jeff White to Sandringham and omitted another 30 plus year old in James McDonald due to injury. David Neitz, Adem Yze, Russell Robertson, Nathan Carroll and Ben Holland were others who were there at the start of the year but missing from the team along with the injured Jared Rivers and Brent Moloney. In ringing in these latest changes, coach Dean Bailey warned supporters not to expect "a quick fix." Welcome to the slow fix then! The majority of the team that played against the Brisbane Lions came well within the guidelines established by Bailey before the season when he proclaimed that he was in the business of building a team with the emphasis on players 23 years of age and less. And so the football world saw youth pitted against a Leigh Matthews coached Brisbane Lions who were aiming for a top four slot and immediately pronounced Melbourne dead and buried for the week at least. However, as was the case with Mark Twain, the news of the Demons' demise was greatly exaggerated. It was Melbourne that came out with a sense of purpose and attacked the ball with aggression and a single-minded desire to win and suddenly, the game was not going according to script. Melbourne held firm to half time, saw off a few challenges in the third term and even when things looked grim as Brisbane twice stormed to a lead late in the game, they were able to muster up enough inner strength to fight back and regain the lead. The win was a real team effort but veterans like Green and Wheatley had an enormous say in the result as did the often maligned Brad Miller who demonstrated why the club’s faith and was well placed when he was included in the leadership group earlier this season. His great pack mark and goal late in the game gave his team the lead and the win but his three first quarter goals provided the spark to start the run to victory. There were several memorable moments and inspirational efforts like Paul Johnson's running down of Justin Sherman, Aussie's goal sense, Chris Johnson's coming of age, Lynden Dunn's tagging of Simon Black, Colin Sylvia rising to dangerous up forward and Colin Garland's dashes out of defence. Even Stefan Martin's subdued debut was the stuff of fairy tales. Two years ago he decided to give up a budding career as an potential international basketballer to have a kick with his mates at Old Haileybury Under 19's. Now, he's a fully fledged AFL footballer and has a VCE ENTER score of 99.75 which is only slightly lower than his winning percentage of AFL games played. Much was said after the game of Brisbane needlessly conceding free kicks through an interchange error and because its physio was in the wrong place at the wrong time and the point that wasn’t but all that ignores the fact that the Lions were gifted a few simple goals courtesy of some dodgy umpiring decisions. We all know by now that it’s asking too much to expect the men who make the decisions to be consistent. We can't expect a young team to be consistent either for that matter. There will be good days and there will be bad as the remainder of the season unfolds. Whatever the case, the future is looking brighter than it did three months ago and it will be brighter in three months and three year's time. There are five more young men waiting in the wings (three of them All Australian Under 18's playing at Sandringham where Cale Morton has averaged 30 touches a game for the past fortnight) and a good draft position looms at the end of the year. Our time is coming - it's just that the fix is a slow one and we need to be patient in order to savour more wins like Sunday against the Brisbane Lions. Melbourne 5.4.34 6.6.42 9.8.62 14.9.93 Brisbane Lions 2.3.15 5.9.39 7.12.54 13.14.92 Goals Melbourne Miller Sylvia 4 Bruce Wonaeamirri 2 Bate Green Brisbane Lions Brown 5 Bradshaw 4 Hooper 2 Patfull Rischitelli Best Melbourne Green Wheatley Miller C Johnson Sylvia Jones Garland Brisbane Lions Power Brown Rischitelli Black Hooper McGrath Injuries Melbourne McLean (ankle) Brisbane Lions Nil Umpires Head Armstrong Jeffery Reports Nil Changes Melbourne Nil Brisbane Lions Johnstone (hamstring) replaced by Polkinghorne Crowd 23,278 at MCG VIDEO HIGHLIGHTS: Q1 MELBOURNE v BRISBANE LIONS Q2 MELBOURNE v BRISBANE LIONS Q3 MELBOURNE v BRISBANE LIONS Q4 MELBOURNE v BRISBANE LIONS MELBOURNE V BRISBANE LIONS FINAL MINUTES

by Barry from Beach Road Sandringham suffered its third successive defeat on Sunday when it lowered its colours to the Werribee Tigers by a solitary goal in blustery conditions at Chirnside Park, Werribee. The hosts got off to a flying start with the assistance of the wind and they scored by five goals to nil in the opening quarter to lead by 32 points at the first break. From there, the Zebras were forced to play catch up football all day and, despite narrowing the gap in every succeeding quarter, they were still short by a goal at the final siren. Sandy wore their clash colours and had Jeff White in the ruck as proceedings opened. He got his hands to the ball first in the early ruck contests but it was Werribee that was easily winning the clearances in the opening minutes of the game. The Zebras' skills were well below par, they had few winners and they simply couldn't hit a target in a poor start to the game. The exceptions were Adem Yze and youngster Cale Morton who won plenty of the early ball but lacked support from their team mates. Forward Michael Newton, on return from injury and a stint in the reserves, was marking well but he had trouble converting on the scoreboard as Sandringham struggled with their slow start. Things started to turn around slowly for the Zebras who had the aid of the breeze in the second term and it was Morton who kicked a lovely goal form a long way out to really get things moving. Sandy was still getting good service from White in the ruck who also received valuable support from John Meesen at this stage. Yze was everywhere and Newton was still marking strongly but not converting and the Zebras were moving the ball much better and getting great run off half back. With Nick Sautner back in the goals, the visitors finished the opening half full of running, kicking the 4 goals 1 behinds in the last ten minutes to narrow the deficit from 35 points to just ten at the main break. The Tigers regained control in the early part of the third quarter but had a lot of trouble converting and managed only 2 goals 6 for the term. As the quarter went on there appeared to be a shift in momentum as the Sandy back line began to get on top. James Frawley was playing well on the dangerous James Podsiadly, Nathan Carroll took control of his opponent and Ricky Petterd, returning from a long lay off, also started to give some good run. As the quarter went on, Chad Liddell was doing a lot of hard work in the middle of the ground and Sandy plugged away at reducing the Werribee lead. Saunter and Newton were providing good targets up forward but the loss of Ezra Poyas to a hamstring injury robbed the Zebras of a valuable player and they definitely missed his run and leadership. Despite this, the Zebras appeared well placed at the final change when they trailed by only 8 points and there was a strong sense of belief in the Sandringham huddle at ¾ time. With the breeze at their team’s backs, the fans smelled tiger blood. Sandringham definitely had its opportunities to win the game but a silly free kick and a resulting 50 metre penalty given away by Meesen proved costly. The Zebras fought the game right out with White winning the ruck, Yze bringing his own ball (he finished with 37 possessions), Liddell still doing the hard work and young Morton showing some silky skills. Saunter and Newton were proving a handful in the twin forward posts but the high flying Newton let himself and his team down with an inaccurate 2 goals five behinds. Rod Crowe was creative at times and skipper Peter Summers worked hard for the Zebras who introduced another newcomer in Jake Williams. Although the Zebras came close in the end, they probably did not deserve to win as their first quarter effort was poor and their performance on the day was generally patchy. The team needs to regroup as its season is on the line over the next fortnight with games against leading sides North Ballarat (away) and Williamstown. HOW THE DEMONS FARED The following are quotes from Sandringham coach Andy Lovell which appear in his Player Review on the Melbourne Football Club website:- Daniel Bell - "played a really good game at half back. He beat his man and had 23 possessions. He was really strong and physical in his attack on the ball. He ran hard and gave us some good drive and rebound off half back. In his first game back, he had a really positive impact." Nathan Carroll - "had a poor first quarter, but after quarter time, he was rock solid. He had 18 possessions, and played at full back on Leigh Brown. This was also his first game back after missing with suspension, and overall, he played a really solid game. " James Frawley - "was solid for us down back. His opponent kicked one goal on him. He did turn the ball over a little bit with his kicking, but defensively he was really solid." Michael Newton -"was really lively. He showed speed and led up really hard, taking 13 marks, which was a great effort. Unfortunately, he kicked the ball poorly, with two goals, five behinds and two out on the full. He did however, have 11 one percenters and six tackles. Three of our goals came directly from his forward line pressure. This was a really encouraging game for Michael, because he was back to the intensity and capabilities that we all know he possesses." Ricky Petterd - "this was his first senior game, and he played at half back. In the first quarter, he gave his man a lot of room and got led up to the ball. In the second half, he tightened up and played one-on-one football. He finished the game by beating his man, and was really strong and hard at the ball. He did turn the ball over and could have used it better, but overall it was certainly a positive first game back for him. " Tom McNamara - "played his second game of fooball at the senior level. He played at half back and was much improved. He beat his man one-on-one, and had 13 possessions, but he didn’t run to create as much as we would have liked. However, he is still learning the game and trying to find his feet. Tom looked calm under pressure, and showed that he is a good decision maker." John Meesen - "struggled to have an impact on the game. His used the ball all right without being super. He just has to get his hands on the ball more and use his major strength, which is running. He also has to physically impose himself on the game more. He disappointingly gave away a 50 metre penalty late in the game that really hurt the team, and this was unfortunate. " Cale Morton - "again, Cale got lot of the ball with 28 possessions. He played on a wing, and played as a midfielder through centre bounces. He had seven one percenters, which was a real improvement and that’s been an area of the game which has been a focus for him. In an average team performance, Cale was a good contributor." Jeff White - "dominated the ruck. He had 23 possessions, taking seven marks and linking up well around the ground. He had a great attitude and was thoroughly professional in his approach. Jeff won a lot of respect through his actions on Sunday." Adem Yze - "won plenty of the ball and impacted the game with 34 possessions. He did turn the ball over and kicked it poorly at times. Otherwise, he could have had a bigger, more positive impact on the game, but he didn’t use the ball as well as he normally does. He still competed hard." Sandringham 0.2.2 6.3.39 9.5.59 13.9.87 Werribee Tigers 5.4.34. 7.7.49 9.13.67 13.15.93 Goals Sandringham Sautner 4 Lamb Newton 2 Bell Morton Poyas Summers Yze Werribee Tigers Brown 3 Henderson Podsiadly McMahon 2 Chisholm Davies Sheringham Young Best Sandringham Yze Newton Liddell Crowe Frawley White Werribee Tigers Goldstein Thompson Davies Greenwood Howard Ross The reserves had a strong victory over the Werribee Tigers in a curtain raiser that saw the return of David Gallagher after a knee injury and a handy debut by a youngster who looks to have a great future in Jack Grimes who captained the Victorian Under 18’s last year. Guy Martyn starred with six goals in a dynamic performance for the Zebras. He received great support from tough youngster Kyle Cheney, Marc Johnston and Sam Monaghan put in another fine performance. HOW THE DEMONS FARED More quotes from Sandringham coach Andy Lovell which appear in his Player Review on the Melbourne Football Club website:- Kyle Cheney - "was close to being best on ground, playing across half back and in the midfield. Obviously he got demoted from the seniors, but went back to the reserves and really impacted the game. He rebounded hard off half back, he marked the ball well, and he also used it pretty well. He also showed some intensity and speed, which is what we have asked him to do." Jack Grimes - " This was his first game for the Club, and first for the year. Jack played off half back and in the midfield, collecting 18 possessions in only one half of football. He was really poised and showed he is a good decision maker. He had time and space when he had the ball, and used it pretty well. It was a really encouraging performance first up, and the kid showed that he had a bit of class. Physically, he pulled up well afterwards, which was good. " Addam Maric - "played at half back, which was part of his development to gain a better understanding of opponent accountability. He needs to be able to play on a man, beat him and then win the ball. He had 33 possessions off half back, which was very good. He still did struggle a little bit playing super tight on his man, but it was a really good learning curve for him. His attitude was also really positive. He went back and worked hard on his game, rebounding and using the ball really well." Isaac Weetra - "had 16 touches, and was a lot more positive again. His workrate was right up there, and his repeat efforts were better. He is looking increasingly confident and assured in his game. He is just starting to work a bit harder, and is getting his hands on the ball." Sandringham 5.2.32 9.11.65 12.14.86 19.18.132 Werribee Tigers 3.1.19 3.2.20 7.5.47 8.10.58 Goals Sandringham Martyn 6 Hardiman Kondarovskis 3 Weetra 2 Cheney Cleeve Fleming M Johnston Monaghan Werribee Tigers Jackel 2 Bloomfield Mahoney O'Brien Sharp Thompson Wormald Best Sandringham Martyn Cheney M Johnston Gribbin Hardiman Monaghan Werribee Tigers Sharp Hudson Palmer Magnabosco Zerafa Mahoney Reported Werribee Tigers J. Palmer for tripping Sandringham Nil

SLOW START SINKS SANDY by Barry from Beach Road Sandringham suffered its third successive defeat on Sunday when it lowered its colours to the Werribee Tigers by a solitary goal in blustery conditions at Chirnside Park, Werribee. The hosts got off to a flying start with the assistance of the wind and they scored by five goals to nil in the opening quarter to lead by 32 points at the first break. From there, the Zebras were forced to play catch up football all day and, despite narrowing the gap in every succeeding quarter, they were still short by a goal at the final siren. Sandy wore their clash colours and had Jeff White in the ruck as proceedings opened. He got his hands to the ball first in the early ruck contests but it was Werribee that was easily winning the clearances in the opening minutes of the game. The Zebras' skills were well below par, they had few winners and they simply couldn't hit a target in a poor start to the game. The exceptions were Adem Yze and youngster Cale Morton who won plenty of the early ball but lacked support from their team mates. Forward Michael Newton, on return from injury and a stint in the reserves, was marking well but he had trouble converting on the scoreboard as Sandringham struggled with their slow start. Things started to turn around slowly for the Zebras who had the aid of the breeze in the second term and it was Morton who kicked a lovely goal form a long way out to really get things moving. Sandy was still getting good service from White in the ruck who also received valuable support from John Meesen at this stage. Yze was everywhere and Newton was still marking strongly but not converting and the Zebras were moving the ball much better and getting great run off half back. With Nick Sautner back in the goals, the visitors finished the opening half full of running, kicking the 4 goals 1 behinds in the last ten minutes to narrow the deficit from 35 points to just ten at the main break. The Tigers regained control in the early part of the third quarter but had a lot of trouble converting and managed only 2 goals 6 for the term. As the quarter went on there appeared to be a shift in momentum as the Sandy back line began to get on top. James Frawley was playing well on the dangerous James Podsiadly, Nathan Carroll took control of his opponent and Ricky Petterd, returning from a long lay off, also started to give some good run. As the quarter went on, Chad Liddell was doing a lot of hard work in the middle of the ground and Sandy plugged away at reducing the Werribee lead. Saunter and Newton were providing good targets up forward but the loss of Ezra Poyas to a hamstring injury robbed the Zebras of a valuable player and they definitely missed his run and leadership. Despite this, the Zebras appeared well placed at the final change when they trailed by only 8 points and there was a strong sense of belief in the Sandringham huddle at ¾ time. With the breeze at their team’s backs, the fans smelled tiger blood. Sandringham definitely had its opportunities to win the game but a silly free kick and a resulting 50 metre penalty given away by Meesen proved costly. The Zebras fought the game right out with White winning the ruck, Yze bringing his own ball (he finished with 37 possessions), Liddell still doing the hard work and young Morton showing some silky skills. Saunter and Newton were proving a handful in the twin forward posts but the high flying Newton let himself and his team down with an inaccurate 2 goals five behinds. Rod Crowe was creative at times and skipper Peter Summers worked hard for the Zebras who introduced another newcomer in Jake Williams. Although the Zebras came close in the end, they probably did not deserve to win as their first quarter effort was poor and their performance on the day was generally patchy. The team needs to regroup as its season is on the line over the next fortnight with games against leading sides North Ballarat (away) and Williamstown. HOW THE DEMONS FARED The following are quotes from Sandringham coach Andy Lovell which appear in his Player Review on the Melbourne Football Club website:- Daniel Bell - "played a really good game at half back. He beat his man and had 23 possessions. He was really strong and physical in his attack on the ball. He ran hard and gave us some good drive and rebound off half back. In his first game back, he had a really positive impact." Nathan Carroll - "had a poor first quarter, but after quarter time, he was rock solid. He had 18 possessions, and played at full back on Leigh Brown. This was also his first game back after missing with suspension, and overall, he played a really solid game. " James Frawley - "was solid for us down back. His opponent kicked one goal on him. He did turn the ball over a little bit with his kicking, but defensively he was really solid." Michael Newton -"was really lively. He showed speed and led up really hard, taking 13 marks, which was a great effort. Unfortunately, he kicked the ball poorly, with two goals, five behinds and two out on the full. He did however, have 11 one percenters and six tackles. Three of our goals came directly from his forward line pressure. This was a really encouraging game for Michael, because he was back to the intensity and capabilities that we all know he possesses." Ricky Petterd - "this was his first senior game, and he played at half back. In the first quarter, he gave his man a lot of room and got led up to the ball. In the second half, he tightened up and played one-on-one football. He finished the game by beating his man, and was really strong and hard at the ball. He did turn the ball over and could have used it better, but overall it was certainly a positive first game back for him. " Tom McNamara - "played his second game of fooball at the senior level. He played at half back and was much improved. He beat his man one-on-one, and had 13 possessions, but he didn’t run to create as much as we would have liked. However, he is still learning the game and trying to find his feet. Tom looked calm under pressure, and showed that he is a good decision maker." John Meesen - "struggled to have an impact on the game. His used the ball all right without being super. He just has to get his hands on the ball more and use his major strength, which is running. He also has to physically impose himself on the game more. He disappointingly gave away a 50 metre penalty late in the game that really hurt the team, and this was unfortunate. " Cale Morton - "again, Cale got lot of the ball with 28 possessions. He played on a wing, and played as a midfielder through centre bounces. He had seven one percenters, which was a real improvement and that’s been an area of the game which has been a focus for him. In an average team performance, Cale was a good contributor." Jeff White - "dominated the ruck. He had 23 possessions, taking seven marks and linking up well around the ground. He had a great attitude and was thoroughly professional in his approach. Jeff won a lot of respect through his actions on Sunday." Adem Yze - "won plenty of the ball and impacted the game with 34 possessions. He did turn the ball over and kicked it poorly at times. Otherwise, he could have had a bigger, more positive impact on the game, but he didn’t use the ball as well as he normally does. He still competed hard." Sandringham 0.2.2 6.3.39 9.5.59 13.9.87 Werribee Tigers 5.4.34. 7.7.49 9.13.67 13.15.93 Goals Sandringham Sautner 4 Lamb Newton 2 Bell Morton Poyas Summers Yze Werribee Tigers Brown 3 Henderson Podsiadly McMahon 2 Chisholm Davies Sheringham Young Best Sandringham Yze Newton Liddell Crowe Frawley White Werribee Tigers Goldstein Thompson Davies Greenwood Howard Ross The reserves had a strong victory over the Werribee Tigers in a curtain raiser that saw the return of David Gallagher after a knee injury and a handy debut by a youngster who looks to have a great future in Jack Grimes who captained the Victorian Under 18’s last year. Guy Martyn starred with six goals in a dynamic performance for the Zebras. He received great support from tough youngster Kyle Cheney, Marc Johnston and Sam Monaghan put in another fine performance. HOW THE DEMONS FARED More quotes from Sandringham coach Andy Lovell which appear in his Player Review on the Melbourne Football Club website:- Kyle Cheney - "was close to being best on ground, playing across half back and in the midfield. Obviously he got demoted from the seniors, but went back to the reserves and really impacted the game. He rebounded hard off half back, he marked the ball well, and he also used it pretty well. He also showed some intensity and speed, which is what we have asked him to do." Jack Grimes - " This was his first game for the Club, and first for the year. Jack played off half back and in the midfield, collecting 18 possessions in only one half of football. He was really poised and showed he is a good decision maker. He had time and space when he had the ball, and used it pretty well. It was a really encouraging performance first up, and the kid showed that he had a bit of class. Physically, he pulled up well afterwards, which was good. " Addam Maric - "played at half back, which was part of his development to gain a better understanding of opponent accountability. He needs to be able to play on a man, beat him and then win the ball. He had 33 possessions off half back, which was very good. He still did struggle a little bit playing super tight on his man, but it was a really good learning curve for him. His attitude was also really positive. He went back and worked hard on his game, rebounding and using the ball really well." Isaac Weetra - "had 16 touches, and was a lot more positive again. His workrate was right up there, and his repeat efforts were better. He is looking increasingly confident and assured in his game. He is just starting to work a bit harder, and is getting his hands on the ball." Sandringham 5.2.32 9.11.65 12.14.86 19.18.132 Werribee Tigers 3.1.19 3.2.20 7.5.47 8.10.58 Goals Sandringham Martyn 6 Hardiman Kondarovskis 3 Weetra 2 Cheney Cleeve Fleming M Johnston Monaghan Werribee Tigers Jackel 2 Bloomfield Mahoney O'Brien Sharp Thompson Wormald Best Sandringham Martyn Cheney M Johnston Gribbin Hardiman Monaghan Werribee Tigers Sharp Hudson Palmer Magnabosco Zerafa Mahoney Reported Werribee Tigers J. Palmer for tripping Sandringham Nil

Brad Green makes inroads into Brock's lead:- 78.366 Brock McLean 62.853 Brad Green 44.698 Paul Wheatley 40.082 Austin Wonaemirri 36.880 Brad Miller 35.034 Colin Garland 30.899 Cameron Bruce 29.701 Aaron Davey 26.666 Paul Johnson 25.733 Matthew Bate 25.458 Colin Sylvia 24.347 Nathan Jones 19.753 Cale Morton 16.600 Chris Johnson 14.482 James McDonald 12.282 Brent Moloney 10.684 Jared Rivers 10.482 Nathan Carroll 10.346 Matthew Warnock 8.132 Clint Bartram 8.070 Lynden Dunn 5.904 Matthew Whelan 5.265 Russell Robertson 5.087 Jeff White 2.845 Adem Yze 1.805 Simon Buckley 1.011 Shane Valenti

Today's match weighting is over 1 or 100% for only the second time this year (which should be obvious because you only get over 1 when you win!) = 1.010869. In honour of Demon Head's magnificent performance of tippping Melbourne to win against the odds, he has the honour of naming his best six for inclusion in the POTY award. Unfortunatley, I can't all Y_M's votes because he's been filtered out of my visibility for the next 6 months as promised elsewhere. Bad luck mate but you should keep trying though :D .

You velcome Actually the locals think the whole Tankanui story is a lot of Bula

West Coast Eagles star midfielder Daniel Kerr was been stung by a stingray at the St Kilda Sea Baths this morning - Kerr stung by stingray

Dear Demonlanders, I'm holidaying at the moment with my wife in Fiji where I uncovered in a bookstore an old volume containing the Diary of Captain James Cook's last voyage. The book was edited by his midshipman R.M.M. Savage. AN EXCERPT FROM THE DIARY OF CAPTAIN JAMES COOK edited by R.M.M. Savage Saturday June 28th 1777 A full year has passed since The Resolution sailed from the Nore on June 25th 1776 and a month has gone by since I made my reluctant decision to bear away from the Easterly Wind and make for the Friendly Islands,* which were to the W. Knowing from my previous voyage that these islands would give good anchorage and provide us with all that we are in such urgent need of, I planned to remain there for 2½ months before proceeding on the expedition to Tahiti and the Americas. One of my official duties is to carry out a search for the legendary NW Passage but I also yearn to locate some paradise that I can name after my sponsor, the Fourth Earl of Sandwich where I, like all good gentlemen of England, might have the opportunity to luxuriate in a warm temperate climate among friendly native women. Tongatapu is the most populous of the Friendly islands. It was there that I came upon a curious group of people from the nearby islands of Fiji. Curious, not just because of their pleasant disposition and their friendly nature which are common features in these regions but because of their very strange customs and mannerisms. In my acquaintance, they soon acquired some additional habits and were constantly obliging in my company. They would often smile when presented with gifts and nod to each other saying, "tank you" which immediately elicited the response, "you velcome." This pleased me greatly. I was also pleased at the gifts they game me which included a store of Fijian red and blue feathers, a very highly prized possession whose main source of supply is the "Collared Lory", a red parrot native to their lands. In return for this generous gift, I agreed to give passage home to the west coast of Viti Levu (the main island in Fiji) to one of their young retinue. He was a tall, spritely lad of seventeen years who stood taller than the tallest of trees that we had witnessed standing high on the shores of Terra Australis, which we had lately visited. We conferred upon the boy the appellation "Nicholas" after Saint Nicholas the Wonderworker because of the many miracles attributed to him. Our new Nicholas was also capable of miracles as he was endowed of great spring and the swiftness of a deer. At this time, I had been suffering from the rheumatics, the pain beginning at the hip and extending across my groin and right down to the heel. The Resolution was navigated by a young master named Bligh. As we neared the outskirts of the island of Viti Levu a great storm approached from the SE and Bligh counselled against us venturing near the island. When I broke this news to Nicholas, he smiled at me, beckoned farewell and took one almighty leap right off the ship’s fo'c'sle and into the foaming white seas below. As one of the few in the ship's company who was able to swim, I momentarily entertained the idea of jumping in to save him but my affliction and a belly full of the native beverage kava caused great unsteadiness in my mind and my body and prevented me from doing so. The last we saw of young Nicholas was a flash of long arms and legs stroking perfectly towards the shore. This evening, as my eyes gazed upwards in the direction of the constellation of the Southern Cross, I wondered whether I would ever see his likes again for such specimens of human magnificence and athleticism are indeed rare commodities. I will always remember fondly this young man Nicholas Tankanui and I swear to the Lord above that I will never in all my remaining days on this earth forget how his countrymen and his family members took so fondly to the use of the expression "tank you". * Now known as the Tonga Islands.

Dear Demonlanders, I'm holidaying at the moment with my wife in Fiji where I uncovered in a bookstore an old volume containing the Diary of Captain James Cook's last voyage. The book was edited by his midshipman R.M.M. Savage. AN EXCERPT FROM THE DIARY OF CAPTAIN JAMES COOK edited by R.M.M. Savage Saturday June 28th 1777 A full year has passed since The Resolution sailed from the Nore on June 25th 1776 and a month has gone by since I made my reluctant decision to bear away from the Easterly Wind and make for the Friendly Islands,* which were to the W. Knowing from my previous voyage that these islands would give good anchorage and provide us with all that we are in such urgent need of, I planned to remain there for 2½ months before proceeding on the expedition to Tahiti and the Americas. One of my official duties is to carry out a search for the legendary NW Passage but I also yearn to locate some paradise that I can name after my sponsor, the Fourth Earl of Sandwich where I, like all good gentlemen of England, might have the opportunity to luxuriate in a warm temperate climate among friendly native women. Tongatapu is the most populous of the Friendly islands. It was there that I came upon a curious group of people from the nearby islands of Fiji. Curious, not just because of their pleasant disposition and their friendly nature which are common features in these regions but because of their very strange customs and mannerisms. In my acquaintance, they soon acquired some additional habits and were constantly obliging in my company. They would often smile when presented with gifts and nod to each other saying, "tank you" which immediately elicited the response, "you velcome." This pleased me greatly. I was also pleased at the gifts they game me which included a store of Fijian red and blue feathers, a very highly prized possession whose main source of supply is the "Collared Lory", a red parrot native to their lands. In return for this generous gift, I agreed to give passage home to the west coast of Viti Levu (the main island in Fiji) to one of their young retinue. He was a tall, spritely lad of seventeen years who stood taller than the tallest of trees that we had witnessed standing high on the shores of Terra Australis, which we had lately visited. We conferred upon the boy the appellation "Nicholas" after Saint Nicholas the Wonderworker because of the many miracles attributed to him. Our new Nicholas was also capable of miracles as he was endowed of great spring and the swiftness of a deer. At this time, I had been suffering from the rheumatics, the pain beginning at the hip and extending across my groin and right down to the heel. The Resolution was navigated by a young master named Bligh. As we neared the outskirts of the island of Viti Levu a great storm approached from the SE and Bligh counselled against us venturing near the island. When I broke this news to Nicholas, he smiled at me, beckoned farewell and took one almighty leap right off the ship’s fo'c'sle and into the foaming white seas below. As one of the few in the ship's company who was able to swim, I momentarily entertained the idea of jumping in to save him but my affliction and a belly full of the native beverage kava caused great unsteadiness in my mind and my body and prevented me from doing so. The last we saw of young Nicholas was a flash of long arms and legs stroking perfectly towards the shore. This evening, as my eyes gazed upwards in the direction of the constellation of the Southern Cross, I wondered whether I would ever see his likes again for such specimens of human magnificence and athleticism are indeed rare commodities. I will always remember fondly this young man Nicholas Tankanui and I swear to the Lord above that I will never in all my remaining days on this earth forget how his countrymen and his family members took so fondly to the use of the expression "tank you". * Now known as the Tonga Islands.

FORGET THE QUICK FIX Give me kids, kids and more kids says Dean Bailey.

by Demon Head It wasn't fun growing up as a Melbourne supporter in the early 1980's. Wins were few and far between and when the team tasted victory, you savoured it. Winning matches was a matter of pride for the embattled Demon supporter and even when the season was virtually done and dusted and your team was sitting in tenth place (they had a final five in those days) all you hoped for if you were an optimist like me was that the Dees would string together a couple of late wins and finish eighth so that you might salvage some honour out of a season. Things have changed these days as I discovered during my recent holiday out west where both of the local sides are struggling this year and a heated controversy rages about whether the Eagles, in particular, are trying to win or whether they are (ahem) "tanking" in order to take advantage of an early draft pick at the end of the year. As a Demon fan, I must confess that I don't feel as bad as I should when I watch my team struggling for wins, as it has in the past months, because I am also aware of the potential pot of gold at the end of the rainbow in the form of an early national draft selection. On that note, I was surprised and amused to read the headline on an article this week - "Bailey plans changes for consistency." What does that mean? We've been losing games consistently this year, so do we really need to make changes to maintain our consistent losing record? That's obviously not the tack that Dean Bailey is taking but my immediate reaction was indicative of the effect of all this talk about teams losing to get a better position in the draft. It's wrong and it's about time the AFL pulled its head out of the sand and did something to change the system. It’s all about perception and as long as the perception is that some clubs are producing mediocre performances and being rewarded for it, then the AFL must act to produce a better draft system. Getting rid of the two year priority system is one way of reducing the effects of the problem. A lottery system would also help. The irony is that the pot of draft gold may not be all that significant in the real world anyway. In the case of the Melbourne Football Club, an early draft pick would be handy but there are a lot of other things that need to happen, apart from picking up one player among the best of the young kids in the land, in order for a team to improve beyond its current levels. There have been some recent signs that Dean Bailey has the club on the right track and, though the results might not show it yet, I'm confident we are about to start winning games soon - and it might even be sooner than we think. That's the optimist in me talking but I just have this feeling... THE GAME Brisbane v. Melbourne at the MCG, Sunday 29 June 2008 at 1.10pm HEAD TO HEAD Overall Melbourne 17 wins Brisbane 14 wins At the MCG Melbourne wins Brisbane wins Since 2000 Melbourne 3 wins Brisbane 6 wins The Coaches Bailey 0 wins Matthews 1 win MEDIA TV - Fox Sports 1 live at 1.00pm RADIO - 774ABC K-Rock SEN Triple M 3AW THE BETTING Brisbane to win $1.20 Melbourne to win $4.20 LAST TIME THEY MET Brisbane 19.23.137 defeated Melbourne 13.7.85, Round 6, 2008, at the Gabba History tells that this was the first game of the post David Neitz era. During the preceding week, the skipper was placed on the long-term injury list and a few weeks later, he announced his retirement. Without their long term leader, the team performed as you would expect a young side to do in the absence of strong leadership - it floundered and without any tall targets, it was left to small men, Nathan Jones (4) and Austin Wonaeamirri (3) to score the goals. The inevitable losing margin was 52 points but it could easily have been double that but for the home side's inaccuracy in front of goal. Former Demon Travis Johnstone rubbed it in by kicking the first and last goals for the game. THE TEAMS MELBOURNE Backs Matthew Whelan Colin Garland Matthew Warnock Half backs Brad Green Paul Wheatley Cameron Bruce Centreline Colin Sylvia Brock McLean Lynden Dunn Half forwards Chris Johnson Matthew Bate Aaron Davey Forwards Stefan Martin Brad Miller Austin Wonaeamirri Followers Paul Johnson Clint Bartram Nathan Jones Interchange Jace Bode Simon Buckley Mark Jamar Shane Valenti Emergencies Nathan Carroll Cale Morton Jeff White In Simon Buckley Stefan Martin Shane Valenti Out James Frawley (omitted) James McDonald (groin) Jeff White (omitted) New Stefan Martin (21, Sandringham) BRISBANE LIONS Backs Josh Drummond Daniel Merrett Joel Patfull Half Backs Joel Macdonald Mitch Clark Justin Sherman Centreline Anthony Corrie Simon Black Tim Notting Half Forwards Michael Rischitelli Jonathan Brown Ashley McGrath Forwards Robert Copeland Daniel Bradshaw Jared Brennan Followers Jamie Charman Luke Power Jed Adcock Interchange Tom Collier Rhan Hooper Travis Johnstone Troy Selwood Emergencies Scott Clouston James Polkinghorne Cheynee Stiller In Daniel Bradshaw Travis Johnstone Justin Sherman Out Lachlan Henderson James Polkinghorne Cheynee Stiller (all omitted) AFTER ALL THESE YEARS Q: When was the last time Brisbane played Melbourne on the MCG? A: Certainly not at any time during this century. Melbourne has only played one game against the Lions in its home state since the turn of the century and that was in Round 10 of 2000 in a game played at Telstra Dome. The last eight meetings have been at the Gabba and Brisbane has won six of those games. Now, for the first time since Round 21, 1999 the Demons finally have a true home ground advantage over Lethal's mob. So, after all these years, they have a real chance of beating Brisbane in front of a true home crowd and let's hope that Melbourne fans turn up in their numbers so that Paul McNamee doesn't have to write out a cheque for the privilege of playing on our home soil! The sceptics will argue that home ground advantage means very little against a side that clearly has the edge in terms of personnel, strength and experience. They will point to the Lions’ on ball brigade headed by the in form Simon Black and Luke Power and the dangerous forward combination of Brown and Bradshaw (the latter has averaged 8 goals at the last three meetings of these clubs). They will also point to the fact that the MCG doesn’t engender fear in the hearts of the boys from Brisbane who completed an 83 point thrashing of Collingwood at that venue late last year just before the Pies started their run that ended with the falling just short of a grand final appearance. And the Lions also gave Melbourne a towelling not all that long ago when the teams met in late April when their midfield completely dominated over the young Demons that day and set up a 52 point win that could easily have been a far greater but for their shocking inaccuracy. All that aside, and I'm acting more than on just a hunch, I believe that there has been a fair amount of improvement in this young Demon team over the past couple of months despite the injury woes that have seen important players in David Neitz, Russell Robertson, Brent Moloney and now Jared Rivers outed for the season. The introduction of new blood has helped to stiffen the team’s back line and is beginning to fill the enormous holes caused to its attack by the loss of its backbone of many years. The team's performances remain inconsistent both between and during games but it's their last three games on the home turf of the MCG that has me more than a little impressed. The games were the stirring come from behind victory against the Fremantle Dockers and the two defeats at the hands of Hawthorn and Collingwood. Against the Hawks Melbourne held a 14 point lead with 5 minutes left in the third term. A lucky break set up a Hawthorn goal and three more followed before the final change. Those 5 minutes cost Melbourne the game. Despite that, they came back to regain the lead twice and give the Hawks an almighty fright before they got home by 19 points. It was much the same against the Magpies with the result in doubt until the last five or so minutes. The Demons are losing but they are doing so because of lapses in parts of games and not for the whole of games as they were in the opening rounds of the season. The time will come soon when Melbourne puts a full game together or one that's close enough to 100% of match time. When this happens, many will be surprised but not I won’t be because these things go with the territory of being a young developing side. Why should the victim be Brisbane? I saw the Lions when they played their last game down here in Melbourne a fortnight ago (and their only game at the G so far this year), and while their opposition that day was all class and a top four combination in the Western Bulldogs, Brisbane was troubled all day. The Lions looked uncomfortable on the G in much the same way as they looked uncomfortable when a young, developing Hawthorn surprised them to win by 8 goals on this very same ground a few years ago. Therefore, I’m tipping history to repeat itself and that Melbourne will cause a major upset and win this game. The margin will be by a lucky 13 points. After all, I'm an optimist!

THE OPTIMIST by Demon Head It wasn't fun growing up as a Melbourne supporter in the early 1980's. Wins were few and far between and when the team tasted victory, you savoured it. Winning matches was a matter of pride for the embattled Demon supporter and even when the season was virtually done and dusted and your team was sitting in tenth place (they had a final five in those days) all you hoped for if you were an optimist like me was that the Dees would string together a couple of late wins and finish eighth so that you might salvage some honour out of a season. Things have changed these days as I discovered during my recent holiday out west where both of the local sides are struggling this year and a heated controversy rages about whether the Eagles, in particular, are trying to win or whether they are (ahem) "tanking" in order to take advantage of an early draft pick at the end of the year. As a Demon fan, I must confess that I don't feel as bad as I should when I watch my team struggling for wins, as it has in the past months, because I am also aware of the potential pot of gold at the end of the rainbow in the form of an early national draft selection. On that note, I was surprised and amused to read the headline on an article this week - "Bailey plans changes for consistency." What does that mean? We've been losing games consistently this year, so do we really need to make changes to maintain our consistent losing record? That's obviously not the tack that Dean Bailey is taking but my immediate reaction was indicative of the effect of all this talk about teams losing to get a better position in the draft. It's wrong and it's about time the AFL pulled its head out of the sand and did something to change the system. It’s all about perception and as long as the perception is that some clubs are producing mediocre performances and being rewarded for it, then the AFL must act to produce a better draft system. Getting rid of the two year priority system is one way of reducing the effects of the problem. A lottery system would also help. The irony is that the pot of draft gold may not be all that significant in the real world anyway. In the case of the Melbourne Football Club, an early draft pick would be handy but there are a lot of other things that need to happen, apart from picking up one player among the best of the young kids in the land, in order for a team to improve beyond its current levels. There have been some recent signs that Dean Bailey has the club on the right track and, though the results might not show it yet, I'm confident we are about to start winning games soon - and it might even be sooner than we think. That's the optimist in me talking but I just have this feeling... THE GAME Brisbane v. Melbourne at the MCG, Sunday 29 June 2008 at 1.10pm HEAD TO HEAD Overall Melbourne 17 wins Brisbane 14 wins At the MCG Melbourne wins Brisbane wins Since 2000 Melbourne 3 wins Brisbane 6 wins The Coaches Bailey 0 wins Matthews 1 win MEDIA TV - Fox Sports 1 live at 1.00pm RADIO - 774ABC K-Rock SEN Triple M 3AW THE BETTING Brisbane to win $1.20 Melbourne to win $4.20 LAST TIME THEY MET Brisbane 19.23.137 defeated Melbourne 13.7.85, Round 6, 2008, at the Gabba History tells that this was the first game of the post David Neitz era. During the preceding week, the skipper was placed on the long-term injury list and a few weeks later, he announced his retirement. Without their long term leader, the team performed as you would expect a young side to do in the absence of strong leadership - it floundered and without any tall targets, it was left to small men, Nathan Jones (4) and Austin Wonaeamirri (3) to score the goals. The inevitable losing margin was 52 points but it could easily have been double that but for the home side's inaccuracy in front of goal. Former Demon Travis Johnstone rubbed it in by kicking the first and last goals for the game. THE TEAMS MELBOURNE Backs Matthew Whelan Colin Garland Matthew Warnock Half backs Brad Green Paul Wheatley Cameron Bruce Centreline Colin Sylvia Brock McLean Lynden Dunn Half forwards Chris Johnson Matthew Bate Aaron Davey Forwards Stefan Martin Brad Miller Austin Wonaeamirri Followers Paul Johnson Clint Bartram Nathan Jones Interchange Jace Bode Simon Buckley Mark Jamar Shane Valenti Emergencies Nathan Carroll Cale Morton Jeff White In Simon Buckley Stefan Martin Shane Valenti Out James Frawley (omitted) James McDonald (groin) Jeff White (omitted) New Stefan Martin (21, Sandringham) BRISBANE LIONS Backs Josh Drummond Daniel Merrett Joel Patfull Half Backs Joel Macdonald Mitch Clark Justin Sherman Centreline Anthony Corrie Simon Black Tim Notting Half Forwards Michael Rischitelli Jonathan Brown Ashley McGrath Forwards Robert Copeland Daniel Bradshaw Jared Brennan Followers Jamie Charman Luke Power Jed Adcock Interchange (from) Tom Collier Scott Clouston Rhan Hooper James Polkinghorne Cheynee Stiller Travis Johnstone Troy Selwood In Daniel Bradshaw Scott Clouston Travis Johnstone Justin Sherman Out Lachlan Henderson (omitted) AFTER ALL THESE YEARS Q: When was the last time Brisbane played Melbourne on the MCG? A: Certainly not at any time during this century. Melbourne has only played one game against the Lions in its home state since the turn of the century and that was in Round 10 of 2000 in a game played at Telstra Dome. The last eight meetings have been at the Gabba and Brisbane has won six of those games. Now, for the first time since Round 21, 1999 the Demons finally have a true home ground advantage over Lethal's mob. So, after all these years, they have a real chance of beating Brisbane in front of a true home crowd and let's hope that Melbourne fans turn up in their numbers so that Paul McNamee doesn't have to write out a cheque for the privilege of playing on our home soil! The sceptics will argue that home ground advantage means very little against a side that clearly has the edge in terms of personnel, strength and experience. They will point to the Lions’ on ball brigade headed by the in form Simon Black and Luke Power and the dangerous forward combination of Brown and Bradshaw (the latter has averaged 8 goals at the last three meetings of these clubs). They will also point to the fact that the MCG doesn’t engender fear in the hearts of the boys from Brisbane who completed an 83 point thrashing of Collingwood at that venue late last year just before the Pies started their run that ended with the falling just short of a grand final appearance. And the Lions also gave Melbourne a towelling not all that long ago when the teams met in late April when their midfield completely dominated over the young Demons that day and set up a 52 point win that could easily have been a far greater but for their shocking inaccuracy. All that aside, and I'm acting more than on just a hunch, I believe that there has been a fair amount of improvement in this young Demon team over the past couple of months despite the injury woes that have seen important players in David Neitz, Russell Robertson, Brent Moloney and now Jared Rivers outed for the season. The introduction of new blood has helped to stiffen the team’s back line and is beginning to fill the enormous holes caused to its attack by the loss of its backbone of many years. The team's performances remain inconsistent both between and during games but it's their last three games on the home turf of the MCG that has me more than a little impressed. The games were the stirring come from behind victory against the Fremantle Dockers and the two defeats at the hands of Hawthorn and Collingwood. Against the Hawks Melbourne held a 14 point lead with 5 minutes left in the third term. A lucky break set up a Hawthorn goal and three more followed before the final change. Those 5 minutes cost Melbourne the game. Despite that, they came back to regain the lead twice and give the Hawks an almighty fright before they got home by 19 points. It was much the same against the Magpies with the result in doubt until the last five or so minutes. The Demons are losing but they are doing so because of lapses in parts of games and not for the whole of games as they were in the opening rounds of the season. The time will come soon when Melbourne puts a full game together or one that's close enough to 100% of match time. When this happens, many will be surprised but not I won’t be because these things go with the territory of being a young developing side. Why should the victim be Brisbane? I saw the Lions when they played their last game down here in Melbourne a fortnight ago (and their only game at the G so far this year), and while their opposition that day was all class and a top four combination in the Western Bulldogs, Brisbane was troubled all day. The Lions looked uncomfortable on the G in much the same way as they looked uncomfortable when a young, developing Hawthorn surprised them to win by 8 goals on this very same ground a few years ago. Therefore, I’m tipping history to repeat itself and that Melbourne will cause a major upset and win this game. The margin will be by a lucky 13 points. After all, I'm an optimist!

by Barry from Beach Road Sandringham's form slump deepened on Sunday at Trevor Barker Beach Oval with the team hardly raising a whimper when it took on traditional rival Port Melbourne. The visitors led from start to finish and completely outclassed the Zebras by 67 points. The Zebras welcomed back some of their important goal kicking power with the return of Nick Sautner, Ezra Poyas and Addam Maric who were all missing last week but it was all to no avail. Sautner finished with four goals but these mostly came when the game was virtually over while Poyas was well below his best and managed only one goal for the day. The enthusiastic Borough under Garry Ayres played with the aggression and commitment that typified their coach's playing career and proved far too strong and skilful on the day. Port was untroubled early as it scooted away to a three goal lead by quarter time and then completely dominated the second quarter making Sandy look second rate when it stretched its lead to 10 goals before the home team scored its first for the term just on the bell at half time. The visitors were winning all over the ground; they hunted in packs and usually took front position in contests. They often would brush aside their opponents with ease as they streamed forward time and again and, though Sandy made a fist of it in the final quarter with five goals to six, it was a dismal lowering of the colours as the team fell another game adrift from a top four position. Sandy relied heavily on too few players. Its much vaunted defence was in tatters by the main break with only Andy Biddlecombe on hand to save the team from even greater embarrassment. Stefan Martin tried hard but the back line was generally under enormous pressure as it tried to stop the onslaught from a Port midfield that won most of the stoppages and was more direct and purposeful in its forward movement. The Zebras sorely missed Shane Valenti's hard work in and under the packs and relied heavily on skipper Peter Summers to provide drive in the midfield. Unfortunately, he was left to play what was virtually a lone hand as the team produced one of its poorest games in years. Sandringham must now work very hard during the coming week in order to regain its confidence and the purpose that it showed earlier this year when it was winning its games by comfortable margins. A loss to Werribee away this Sunday could even put the team's finals prospects under pressure so coach Andy Lovell will be keen to see his charges regroup this week as it prepare for a solid performance to turn their season around at Bartercard Oval. HOW THE DEMONS FARED Simon Buckley – given a run with role and applied himself well to the task under difficult conditions. Kyle Cheney - had a real shocker after a couple of promising games. He was often caught out of position and made fundamental errors which can are deadly in defence against a team that has its tails up. Hopefully, he has gained a valuable lesson learn from the experience of this game. Addam Maric - at times he showed some real glimpses of skill and class. Played in a number of positions on the ground and was always interesting when he had the pill but he really needs to get more of it over a full game and not just play in patches. Stefan Martin - played a steady game and tried valiantly to hold together a back line that was under fire consistently through the afternoon. Tom McNamara - the youngest player on any AFL list this year, he showed plenty of run off halfback and took the step up from reserves to seniors without missing a beat. He has a lot of poise and skill that suggests he has the makings of a quality player of the future. John Meesen - was given a bath early and worked hard to get himself back into the game both in the ruck contests and around the ground but still well beaten on the day. Cale Morton – a player who finds the ball a lot during a game and, although he made a few errors, he showed that he is all class and will be a long time AFL player of some stature once he fills out that lean body of his and gets more game time under his belt. Jake Spencer - showed some promise with his enthusiasm around the ground. His tap ruckwork was reasonable. Adem Yze - like most of his teammates, he put in a patchy effort and his afternoon was not particularly productive. Sandringham 2.2.14 3.3.21 6.6.42 11.9.75 Port Melbourne 5.2.32 11.10.76 15.13.103 21.16.142 Goals Sandringham Sautner 4 Morton 2 Buckley Crowe Lamb Poyas Yze Port Melbourne Nahas 6 Dwyer 3 Bonaddio Pinwill Sutcliffe 2 Baird Brewer Dillon Pitt Thomas Smith Best Sandringham Biddlecombe Summers Liddell Buckley Crowe Poyas Port Melbourne Nahas Cotchett Pleming Sutcliffe McMahon Livingston Sandringham Reserves started the day off on the wrong foot when they lost to Port Melbourne by the narrowest of margins. It was a disappointing result as the young Zebras beat the same opposition two months ago by 15 goals at North Port. Daniel Gribbin was the team’s stand out player. Sandringham 1.1.7 4.6.30 8.10.58 10.10.70 Port Melbourne 2.4.16 5.7.37 7.8.50 10.11.71 Goals Sandringham Martyn Zomer 2 Gilchrist Lockwood Lyall Monaghan Petterd Williams Port Melbourne Schultz 3 Bonnici Hassett 2 Francis Mullins Siciliano Best Sandringham Gribbin Curcio Williams Fleming Petterd Monaghan Port Melbourne deBruin Wall Schultz Siciliano Sheldon Pearce

SANDY SLUMPS, PORT SIZZLES by Barry from Beach Road Sandringham's form slump deepened on Sunday at Trevor Barker Beach Oval with the team hardly raising a whimper when it took on traditional rival Port Melbourne. The visitors led from start to finish and completely outclassed the Zebras by 67 points. The Zebras welcomed back some of their important goal kicking power with the return of Nick Sautner, Ezra Poyas and Addam Maric who were all missing last week but it was all to no avail. Sautner finished with four goals but these mostly came when the game was virtually over while Poyas was well below his best and managed only one goal for the day. The enthusiastic Borough under Garry Ayres played with the aggression and commitment that typified their coach's playing career and proved far too strong and skilful on the day. Port was untroubled early as it scooted away to a three goal lead by quarter time and then completely dominated the second quarter making Sandy look second rate when it stretched its lead to 10 goals before the home team scored its first for the term just on the bell at half time. The visitors were winning all over the ground; they hunted in packs and usually took front position in contests. They often would brush aside their opponents with ease as they streamed forward time and again and, though Sandy made a fist of it in the final quarter with five goals to six, it was a dismal lowering of the colours as the team fell another game adrift from a top four position. Sandy relied heavily on too few players. Its much vaunted defence was in tatters by the main break with only Andy Biddlecombe on hand to save the team from even greater embarrassment. Stefan Martin tried hard but the back line was generally under enormous pressure as it tried to stop the onslaught from a Port midfield that won most of the stoppages and was more direct and purposeful in its forward movement. The Zebras sorely missed Shane Valenti's hard work in and under the packs and relied heavily on skipper Peter Summers to provide drive in the midfield. Unfortunately, he was left to play what was virtually a lone hand as the team produced one of its poorest games in years. Sandringham must now work very hard during the coming week in order to regain its confidence and the purpose that it showed earlier this year when it was winning its games by comfortable margins. A loss to Werribee away this Sunday could even put the team's finals prospects under pressure so coach Andy Lovell will be keen to see his charges regroup this week as it prepare for a solid performance to turn their season around at Bartercard Oval. HOW THE DEMONS FARED Simon Buckley – given a run with role and applied himself well to the task under difficult conditions. Kyle Cheney - had a real shocker after a couple of promising games. He was often caught out of position and made fundamental errors which can are deadly in defence against a team that has its tails up. Hopefully, he has gained a valuable lesson learn from the experience of this game. Addam Maric - at times he showed some real glimpses of skill and class. Played in a number of positions on the ground and was always interesting when he had the pill but he really needs to get more of it over a full game and not just play in patches. Stefan Martin - played a steady game and tried valiantly to hold together a back line that was under fire consistently through the afternoon. Tom McNamara - the youngest player on any AFL list this year, he showed plenty of run off halfback and took the step up from reserves to seniors without missing a beat. He has a lot of poise and skill that suggests he has the makings of a quality player of the future. John Meesen - was given a bath early and worked hard to get himself back into the game both in the ruck contests and around the ground but still well beaten on the day. Cale Morton – a player who finds the ball a lot during a game and, although he made a few errors, he showed that he is all class and will be a long time AFL player of some stature once he fills out that lean body of his and gets more game time under his belt. Jake Spencer - showed some promise with his enthusiasm around the ground. His tap ruckwork was reasonable. Adem Yze - like most of his teammates, he put in a patchy effort and his afternoon was not particularly productive. Sandringham 2.2.14 3.3.21 6.6.42 11.9.75 Port Melbourne 5.2.32 11.10.76 15.13.103 21.16.142 Goals Sandringham Sautner 4 Morton 2 Buckley Crowe Lamb Poyas Yze Port Melbourne Nahas 6 Dwyer 3 Bonaddio Pinwill Sutcliffe 2 Baird Brewer Dillon Pitt Thomas Smith Best Sandringham Biddlecombe Summers Liddell Buckley Crowe Poyas Port Melbourne Nahas Cotchett Pleming Sutcliffe McMahon Livingston Sandringham Reserves started the day off on the wrong foot when they lost to Port Melbourne by the narrowest of margins. It was a disappointing result as the young Zebras beat the same opposition two months ago by 15 goals at North Port. Daniel Gribbin was the team’s stand out player. Sandringham 1.1.7 4.6.30 8.10.58 10.10.70 Port Melbourne 2.4.16 5.7.37 7.8.50 10.11.71 Goals Sandringham Martyn Zomer 2 Gilchrist Lockwood Lyall Monaghan Petterd Williams Port Melbourne Schultz 3 Bonnici Hassett 2 Francis Mullins Siciliano Best Sandringham Gribbin Curcio Williams Fleming Petterd Monaghan Port Melbourne deBruin Wall Schultz Siciliano Sheldon Pearce

IT'S A HORROR MOVIE by Grazman (our man on the spot in the National Capital) If I were to describe Sunday's game at Manuka Oval between Melbourne and Sydney I would label it "Horror Movie" This wasn't because our forward line had as much life in its as the late and lamented former front man of Skyhooks, but rather, because like most Hollywood schlock that is passed off as horror, it was just oh so predictable! Even though he was at Port Adelaide at the time, I'm sure someone at the club slipped Dean Bailey a copy of "The Demons House of Manuka Horrors circa 2007". Like all Hollywood sequels there was no need to dig to deep for originality - there wasn't any. The setting hadn't changed (it was still cold and inhospitable), there was a relatively new cast of young innocent characters for the blooding, and the plot borrowed heavily from it's predecessor. Against a professional and well drilled outfit, to be any chance of surviving on the scoreboard we'd have to go toe to toe in the intensity stakes. Unfortunately the first quarter was pretty much what we've come to expect of the Demons lately. MIA for 20 minutes... game over. I was bemoaning the fact that PJ would never ever take another mark above his head, that Barry Hall was monstering poor Matty Warnock and Colin Garland was being torn to pieces by Micky O. Just like the horror movie when you think the young innocent is finally safe, so too we would conspire to turn potentially exciting passages of plays at the last gasp into costly turnovers due to poor skills. That was the story of the afternoon. Sydney had two marking forwards, with over 1,000 AFL goals and 500 AFL games between them while Melbourne had a makeshift forward come ruckman as its one genuine marking option inside the forward fifty while Matthew Bate and Brad Miller had to push hard up the ground in search of kicks because the midfield was given a lesson about intensity and taking the front position. While it was not necessarily reflected on the scoreboard, the second quarter showed a marked increase in work rate, effort and intensity. Bate and Lynden Dunn were the stand outs; these kids are going to be good. Bate was in everything, and while Goodes looked set to have another typical outing for him at Manuka as he got off to a flyer courtesy of some dumb free kicks and umpiring generosity, Dunn did well to negate his effect. CJ was doing a job on O'Keefe which he did well all day and while Warnock and Garland were clearly not strong enough to compete in one on ones with the Swans forwards, they ran to provide options and showed some real poise coming out of defence. The most surprising thing for me was that PJ actually started to take some marks in front of his face and was presenting really well. In general I would say he had the better of Leo Barry who found him just too tall to spoil. The third quarter was easily Melbourne's best with the boys actually moving to make space and leading their opponents to the ball. The midfield started to break even and the Swans looked a little lacklustre when it was their turn to chase. The Dees continued to push, and the script suddenly took a new turn. The Dees were up and about and looked to have found some self-belief. The start of the fourth quarter was a continuation of the third, but unfortunately the wind was taken out of the Demons' sails by some desperately unlucky breaks and a couple of Swan goals against the tide. By the end both sides were playing out time, and while this wasn't quite the one that got away for the boys, there was definitely a sense they were the architects of their own demise by letting their fears take control. It's clear where the team is heading and how Dean Bailey wants them to play and there are some very encouraging signs for the future. In general it was a day where the midfield was well beaten, where the forward line functioned sporadically though not always systematically and the backline was under constant seige, yet we were able to close to within 2 goals and keep the final margin respectable. It was a horror movie alright, it didn't end well for the young innocents and it was predictable, but at least for this Demon fan this was offset because at least this weekend I didn't have to "Watch it right there on my TV." Melbourne 2.2.14 5.3.33 10.5.65 11.8.74 Sydney Swans 7.2.44 10.5.65 12.10.82 17.12.114 Goals Melbourne Bate 4 Wonaeamirri 3 Bruce P Johnson McLean Miller Sydney Swans Hall 5 Buchanan Mattner O'Loughlin 2 Goodes Jolly Malceski R O'Keefe Playfair Roberts-Thomson Best Melbourne Bate Dunn Garland C Johnson P Johnson Warnock Sydney Swans Hall Kirk Mattner Jolly C Bolton O'Loughlin Injuries Melbourne nil Sydney Swans nil Reports Nil Umpires Sully Grun Head Official crowd 11,437 at Manuka Oval

A TEST FOR THE MEMORY BANK by Scoop Junior On a great day for footy in the nation's capital, the Melbourne Football Club went down to top four fancy the Sydney Swans. It was a game that probably won't last too long in the memory bank. As good sides do against lowly opposition, the Swans killed off the contest early with a barnstorming start. They kicked the first five goals of the match and, in doing so, put paid to Melbourne's hopes of an upset victory. During that opening period, the Demons struggled to get their hands on the ball, taking until the fifth minute of the opening term to register their first possession. While it is symptomatic of a young side to go missing at times, this trait is one that the Dees have possessed for far too long and one that has punishing effects as opposition teams pile on the goals with ease dutring such periods. Richmond did it in the second quarter last week with an eight-goal burst; this time it was the Swans. To its credit, Melbourne did fight back in the second term to make it a more even contest. A few goals to each side kept the margin at five goals, with the Demons' improved tackling and pressure making it more difficult for the Swans to score. After half time, Melbourne lifted another gear and for the first time in the match started to produce fluent attacking football. So efficient were the Demons during this quarter that nearly every forward 50 entry resulted in a score. The Dees closed to within 11 points but a late goal to Sydney extended the margin to three goals at the final change. While Melbourne was in the game at three-quarter time, catch-up footy takes it toll. The energy expended in reeling in the deficit was too much for the young team and a lift in application from the Swans resulted in a dominant term for the Sydneysiders. Melbourne could hardly generate any offensive pressure and the Swans' high-pressure high-intensity style wore them out as they fell away to a 40-point defeat. For the Dees, Matthew Bate performed exceptionally well from limited opportunities to boot four goals. With the team limited to a paltry 30 forward entries, Bate did well to make the most of his opportunities in kicking the biggest bag of his career thus far. Brad Miller worked hard at centre half forward and Paul Johnson was particularly influential in the third term, leading up and showing a clean pair of heels to his opponents. Like Bate, Austin Wonaeamirri made the most of his opportunities to boot three majors. It was a great effort in the circumstances, given that Melbourne's lack of forward entries and dearth of big marking targets provided few crumbing opportunities for the little blokes. The midfield was well beaten by a more experienced, hardened outfit. With the likes of Kirk, Jude Bolton, Buchanan and Goodes, the Swans have a multitude of seasoned premiership midfielders who more often than not overcome what opposition clubs throw at them. The young Melbourne midfield was no match, coming up desperately short in the clearances. Brock McLean was nullified by Kirk, Bruce didn't see a lot of it and Jones lacked his usual output. Aaron Davey was quiet for most of the game but played a ripping third quarter, which was one of the main reasons for the Dees’ resurgence during this term. Melbourne looks a different team when the ball is in Flash’s hands, as he not only breaks the lines but delivers with pinpoint accuracy. On a brighter note for the Demons was the performance of Lynden Dunn, who restricted the dangerous Goodes to 12 disposals. It was a fine performance from Dunn, who has now had the better of Goodes, Foley and Swan in the past three weeks. What I like about this list of scalps is that these three players all possess pace, an attribute seriously lacking in Melbourne’s midfield. Dunn's ability to match them adds another dimension to the midfield. However, he now needs to learn how to find more of the footy himself and to provide an attacking influence if he wants to establish a permanent spot in the midfield. Brad Green and Paul Wheatley played well sweeping out of defence, with the formers' sure hands and crisp disposal helping to set up the play, while Chris Johnson played one of his better games for the club, nullifying the hard-working O'Keefe and using his sound kicking skills to initiate attack off half back. Colin Garland was effective without dominating, playing a decent game on O'Loughlin, while fellow young key back James Frawley did some nice things although he is still a number of games and many kilograms away from holding down a key position. Matthew Warnock, who has been somewhat of a revelation in recent weeks, was comprehensively beaten by Barry Hall. The Swans' spearhead had far too much strength and know-how and had he kicked more accurately would have booted 8 goals. In the end, it was a decent effort to limit the margin to 40 points, given Sydney's fast start, their dominance at the stoppages and the limited forward 50 entries from the Demons. While still nowhere near the elite teams, Melbourne's skill level has improved drastically since the early rounds (admittedly it couldn’t get much worse!) and this was highlighted by their efficiency in scoring, particularly in the third quarter. However, Sydney was well below its best for periods of the game and the match did indicate a number of key areas where the Demons need to improve if they are to move up the ladder in the coming years. Nevertheless, this honourable loss will not harm Melbourne's prospects of securing the number 1 pick in the National Draft, a draft which the Dees must extract some top-grade talent if they are to improve their list for the future. Despite the improvement since the early rounds, Melbourne lacks the talent of the top clubs and the best way to address this is with early draft choices and astute drafting and trading. With games against the impressive Lions, the second-placed Bulldogs, Fremantle away and the Kangaroos in the next for weeks, a win looks a fair way away, which is not all bad news given the draft prize of finishing near the bottom of the ladder. Despite only one win for the season thus far, it does promise to be an interesting final nine weeks! Melbourne 2.2.14 5.3.33 10.5.65 11.8.74 Sydney Swans 7.2.44 10.5.65 12.10.82 17.12.114 Goals Melbourne Bate 4 Wonaeamirri 3 Bruce P Johnson McLean Miller Sydney Swans Hall 5 Buchanan Mattner O'Loughlin 2 Goodes Jolly Malceski R O'Keefe Playfair Roberts-Thomson Best Melbourne Green Bate Dunn P Johnson C Johnson Wheatley Sydney Swans Hall Kirk Mattner Jolly C Bolton O'Loughlin For another view of the game from our man in the nation's capital see - IT'S A HORROR MOVIE Current standing is the Demonland Player of the Year Award are: 78.366 Brock McLean 44.657 Brad Green 40.082 Austin Wonaemirri 37.622 Paul Wheatley 34.023 Colin Garland 30.899 Cameron Bruce 29.701 Aaron Davey 25.733 Matthew Bate 24.644 Paul Johnson 24.347 Nathan Jones 22.728 Brad Miller 19.753 Cale Morton 16.360 Colin Sylvia 14.482 James McDonald 12.282 Brent Moloney 10.684 Jared Rivers 10.482 Nathan Carroll 10.346 Matthew Warnock 8.132 Clint Bartram 7.059 Lynden Dunn 6.491 Chris Johnson 5.904 Matthew Whelan 5.265 Russell Robertson 5.087 Jeff White 2.845 Adem Yze 1.805 Simon Buckley

Just a reminder that Demonland is about the Melbourne Football Club and not individual upporters. This thread is locked. See you in October YM.

There will definitely be a match report. Barry is just collecting his thoughts. He's a bit of a shattered man at the moment given that Sandy lost the seniors and the reserves to his hated old rivals from the Burra, not to mention that Mavis, his wife of 26 years, is threatening to leave him if he doesn't stay home, clean the house and mow the lawns next weekend. Please be patient and give the poor man some time.

by Whispering Jack Mick Malthouse has been coaching in the AFL/VFL for two and a half decades. He started as a young coach with the Bulldogs, moved to the West Coast Eagles where he was instrumental in building a team that earned two premiership cups and then took over a basket case at Collingwood to become runner up two years in a row and is now in the course of reshaping and redeveloping his team after some more lean years. Like most of his kind, he has his supporters and his detractors and many of the latter category often say that he makes no sense at all. After reading his latest column in this Friday's Australian newspaper - SHAW-FIRE WORLD OF THE MONDAY COACHES - I'm firmly placed in the former category. At first brush, the article appears to be nothing more than the writer's response to a broadside fired at him by his predecessor Tony Shaw over his recent handling of Shaw's nephew and Magpies defender Heath Shaw. Tony Shaw has previously criticised Malthouse over the handling of Heath's brother Rhyce and there were also mutterings heard when Tony's own son, Brayden spent a single, unsuccesful season in the land of the Lexus. Malthouse put Tony Saw back in his place with this cleverly placed barb: "Tony, in particular, would have been almost punch-drunk, having coached Collingwood from 1996 to 1999, the club's darkest period for more than 50 years." Touche! Those who read the Malthouse article as merely being Malthouse's way of settling a personal core with one of his harshest critics who might also be seen as having a personal vendetta against him would be missing out on something far deeper and more profound about the way AFL clubs are coached these days. As I read the article, I couldn't help but think of our own coach Dean Bailey, of the many young players at the club whose football careers are his responsibility and of the club itself, which is going through the deepest of troughs in the football cycle. We're doing it tough and Bailey must be under some pressure as the team continues to lose games on a regular basis. What many of the critics don't see is the work going on to rebuild our young team and the fact that the fruits of that effort might take some time in the reaping. Malthouse makes the point that every Monday he is the recipient of complaints from the know alls. Even when his team wins by 100 points, as it recently did against West Coast, there's always a smart arse who has the answer to the question why they didn't win by 120 points. Mick's answer to the smart arses is as follows (and we all would do well to take this in): "But the fundamental thing about coaching is to stick to your plans. Our plan at Collingwood, and I dare say at most clubs, is to develop the individual first, which in turn helps to develop the team, which in turn provides the football club and its supporters with a highly competitive combination that will represent at its highest level for a long and sustained period." I must confess that I, like many others, overestimated the strength of the Melbourne list some two years ago when it was cruising towards its third finals series in a row. We couldn't foresee the injury plague that was about to hit the club but even this turned out to be a blessing in disguise because it exposed many of our fundamental weaknesses and hastened the move towards a total reconstruction of the playing list. That transition is now well under way under the club's present coaching regime but we are witnessing the inevitable ugly face of the early stages of a club's redevelopment. As the team becomes more and more reliant on its youth, there will be performances that are full of inconsistency and disappointment. We will also suffer scorn and derision from the rest of the football world and our coach and our players will undergo intense scrutiny. Like Malthouse, Bailey will no doubt get the usual letters suggesting his coaching on the weekend ranged from ordinary to pathetic. There is an upside to this whole process which is that, despite the defeats and the criticism, we are witnessing the slow and steady development of many younsters in the team whose average age keeps falling and whose more senior faces keep disappearing. In addition, there are half a dozen recent draftees including All Australian Under 18 players and elite AIS graduates waiting in the wings who have yet to play an AFL game and who are learning the ropes this year at VFL level. They form part of the club's growing young player bank that will be augmented at the end of the season with more draft picks including some very early selections. I know the word "tanking" is on everyone's lips but it would be absurd to think, as some people do, that the club's future depends entirely upon the necessity to have the first draft choice. Having pick 1 might be better than having pick 4 but it's more important that the coach is focussed firmly on what is, was and always be his primary role at a club. As Malthouse clearly puts it in his conclusion: "... current coaches and players have to prove time and again they can either play or they can coach - it goes with the title."

WHAT'S IT ALL ABOUT? by Whispering Jack Mick Malthouse has been coaching in the AFL/VFL for two and a half decades. He started as a young coach with the Bulldogs, moved to the West Coast Eagles where he was instrumental in building a team that earned two premiership cups and then took over a basket case at Collingwood to become runner up two years in a row and is now in the course of reshaping and redeveloping his team after some more lean years. Like most of his kind, he has his supporters and his detractors and many of the latter category often say that he makes no sense at all. After reading his latest column in this Friday's Australian newspaper - SHAW-FIRE WORLD OF THE MONDAY COACHES - I'm firmly placed in the former category. At first brush, the article appears to be nothing more than the writer's response to a broadside fired at him by his predecessor Tony Shaw over his recent handling of Shaw's nephew and Magpies defender Heath Shaw. Tony Shaw has previously criticised Malthouse over the handling of Heath's brother Rhyce and there were also mutterings heard when Tony's own son, Brayden spent a single, unsuccesful season in the land of the Lexus. Malthouse put Tony Saw back in his place with this cleverly placed barb: "Tony, in particular, would have been almost punch-drunk, having coached Collingwood from 1996 to 1999, the club's darkest period for more than 50 years." Touche! Those who read the Malthouse article as merely being Malthouse's way of settling a personal core with one of his harshest critics who might also be seen as having a personal vendetta against him would be missing out on something far deeper and more profound about the way AFL clubs are coached these days. As I read the article, I couldn't help but think of our own coach Dean Bailey, of the many young players at the club whose football careers are his responsibility and of the club itself, which is going through the deepest of troughs in the football cycle. We're doing it tough and Bailey must be under some pressure as the team continues to lose games on a regular basis. What many of the critics don't see is the work going on to rebuild our young team and the fact that the fruits of that effort might take some time in the reaping. Malthouse makes the point that every Monday he is the recipient of complaints from the know alls. Even when his team wins by 100 points, as it recently did against West Coast, there's always a smart arse who has the answer to the question why they didn't win by 120 points. Mick's answer to the smart arses is as follows (and we all would do well to take this in): "But the fundamental thing about coaching is to stick to your plans. Our plan at Collingwood, and I dare say at most clubs, is to develop the individual first, which in turn helps to develop the team, which in turn provides the football club and its supporters with a highly competitive combination that will represent at its highest level for a long and sustained period." I must confess that I, like many others, overestimated the strength of the Melbourne list some two years ago when it was cruising towards its third finals series in a row. We couldn't foresee the injury plague that was about to hit the club but even this turned out to be a blessing in disguise because it exposed many of our fundamental weaknesses and hastened the move towards a total reconstruction of the playing list. That transition is now well under way under the club's present coaching regime but we are witnessing the inevitable ugly face of the early stages of a club's redevelopment. As the team becomes more and more reliant on its youth, there will be performances that are full of inconsistency and disappointment. We will also suffer scorn and derision from the rest of the football world and our coach and our players will undergo intense scrutiny. Like Malthouse, Bailey will no doubt get the usual letters suggesting his coaching on the weekend ranged from ordinary to pathetic. There is an upside to this whole process which is that, despite the defeats and the criticism, we are witnessing the slow and steady development of many younsters in the team whose average age keeps falling and whose more senior faces keep disappearing. In addition, there are half a dozen recent draftees including All Australian Under 18 players and elite AIS graduates waiting in the wings who have yet to play an AFL game and who are learning the ropes this year at VFL level. They form part of the club's growing young player bank that will be augmented at the end of the season with more draft picks including some very early selections. I know the word "tanking" is on everyone's lips but it would be absurd to think, as some people do, that the club's future depends entirely upon the necessity to have the first draft choice. Having pick 1 might be better than having pick 4 but it's more important that the coach is focussed firmly on what is, was and always be his primary role at a club. As Malthouse clearly puts it in his conclusion: "... current coaches and players have to prove time and again they can either play or they can coach - it goes with the title."

My admiration for Dean Laidley has grown considerably in the light of what he had to say to Big Mouth here - Butt out, Jeff- Laidley