Mazer Rackham

They're watching Twelve Angry Men for clues on how to decide

"Jesus, it's cold." "Why's it always raining here?" "I'm cold, are you?" "Christ, it's cold." "It's so damp and wet. Does it ever stop raining?" "I'm freezing. Can't we go inside?"

They had a Brownlow to protect. JvR can be thrown to the wolves with impunity.

It means prepare yourself for the biggest, most outrageous, mind bending illogic and bamboozlement ever perpetrated by he tribunal.

Get your money on any dogs named Bull-[censored], Joke, Farce and Travesty.

What, specifically, is the moon? As a point of law, I mean.

No sort of precedent. The AFL doesn't do precedent. Within two weeks, someone will do exactly what JvR did and won't be cited. Back in the day you weren't allowed to criticise Josef Stalin either. In more modern times, it's Putin. Green shouldn't stray too near any windows.

One of the ground is that there has been an error of law which is your first clue that the entire tribunal process went off the rails some time ago. IT's not a court. No-one's going to the electric chair. It's a sporting tribunal.

It should not have mattered in the original gearing, but the tribunal members are escapees from Alice in Wonderland.

We should blindside the tribunal and make the case that JvR is an UNreasonable player who won't help pack up the footies at training, and never offers to buy anyone a coffee.

So no-one then. Move along. (In case it wasn't obvious, I am paraphrasing the attitude of AFL house.)

Will we still be able to dump Eddie McGuire into a a pond full of ice water?

They do it all the time. It can hardly be amateurish when they're such experts at it. Laughter is the best medicine. Thanks for brightening my day. Has anyone stopped watching footy yet as a result of this case? No? So where's the problem?

I think you're overlooking one thing ... it's the AFL tribunal! Where common sense goes to die.

This "eyes on the ball" thing is a childlike oversimplification. Yes, juniors get told "keep your eyes on the ball"; it's fundamental to any ball sport. These are not junior players, they are the best in the land. They continually take their eyes off the ball to see what's going on around them. And I don't mean swivelling their heads around; it's a small movement and only takes a split second. Most probably aren't even aware they do it. It's part of what makes them better than players who "keep their eyes on the ball". This is a reverse engineered justification shoehorned in backwards to give plausibility to the ridiculous overlawyered tribunal decision.

Make sure you agree on a safe word before you start.

Lawyers get 3 bites of the cherry, 'nuff said.

They've lost the plot. Back in days when reports were laid by umpires on the spot, charges would get thrown out because of this left/right business. In the heat of the moment the ump wasn't certain which it was. So they brought in a rule to allow umps to amend their report to state the "correct" arm. Now Gleeson, the tribunal chair, lacks the authority to simply amend the charge? More like, lacks the clarity of vision. It's not a court case. No-one's going to prison. They've taken the legalistic approach too far. They've [censored]-ing lost the plot.

The bigger picture story is that the AFL's entire tribunal/enforcement system is in crisis. From the MRO who seems take his cues on what to cite/not cite from the outrage or complacency of TV commentators, to the tribunal itself who seem to have lost sight of what they're supposed to be doing. How can you allow evidence to be tendered and then completely disregard it? The tribunal members are bamboozled and don't know what is up and what is down. The quasi-legal approach has been a disaster.

Gil's legacy. The broken and arbitrary match review & tribunal system. Chook [censored]-ing lotto.

Yeah, I saw that. Ellis is pretty experienced and he very clearly didn't think it was anything but a football act. Pretty telling given the way the Suns were into us for other things.

Legally change his name to Jacob von Ablett, junior, for immunity for the rest of his career.

Why even allow evidence if it's going to be completely and utterly disregarded?

Save money. Dismiss Christian and get match reviews done for free by Kane Cornes.