Mazer Rackham

The only smoking gun evidence Dank has would show that the players, the coaches and club all got off very very lightly. Who knows what game he's playing right now but it's guaranteed to end in tears. (His.)

Family emergency. A member of the family is about to be disgraced in an open hearing. I wonder who'll get sick on December 1? Dank had better keep track of how many of his grandmas have expired.

DC, poster of the week, and it's still only Monday!

I still shudder at the thought that he entered the orbit of our football club, however briefly.

I think we can safely assume that this expert from over the oceans will not appear. Can you imagine the conversation? "I need you to testify on my behalf" "Okayyyyyy .... who will pay my expenses?" "The other side." "Why should they pay for your witness?" "Oh, they will pay ... (manic snicker) ... believe me ... everyone will pay ..." "I heard you're out of money" "I will be rolling in cash soon. After I reveal the truth" "You haven't told the truth to date?" "Of course I have ... at some sportsmen's nights ... but soon I will reveal the truth in the appropriate forum ... and I will be vindicated! A ha ha ha ! A ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" click ... buzz ...

Bang! And that's it in a nutshell. In the cosy brotherhood of the AFL, the real crime of the EFC is to embarrass the league. But like a bunch of blokes on a buck's night out, or at the cricket club on pie night, nah, we're all mates here, no harm done eh! We'll look after you because we're all in it together and we look after each other. No hard feelings. But mate, for gawd's sake, don't do it again. ASADA has forced their way into the clubrooms ... the bloody wowsers ... and tried to shatter the protective shield around the sacred brotherhood. They are not cool. They are outsiders. They tried to send the strippers home. They told Dabba's missus what happened on the golf weekend! They're a bunch of dobbers. They are not one of Us. For that they cannot be forgiven.

It has cost the AFL a lot of time, effort, money, goodwill, etc etc, handling the EFC drugs affair. It screams out that they would not want to go through that again. Why oh why are they not sending an unambiguous message to all clubs and players that they will be dealt with harshly if they dabble in drugs. Instead with their half-and-half message, "if you get caught we'll be on your side ... we may have to do you over but we'll look after you as best we can", they are inviting another episode. Not in the same form as the EFC case ... some new variation ... as clubs test the boundaries. If your dog eats food off the dining table, you give it a whack on the snout. You don't say, "ooh, naughty boy .... naughty" ... and give it a pat.

It's a bit like finally not finishing ninth only to get beaten by the team that did finish ninth.

"It's Brownlow madness at Charlie Shark's Easy Money Emporium! If your selected player leads the vote count but loses the medal as a drug cheat four years later ... CASH BACK! Up to fifty bucks! Conditionsapplyandgambleresponsibly."

Every time he seems to be edging towards the truth, and therefore the realisation that his heroes have feet of clay, he retreats to his standard duped/rogue scientist/good blokes defence. The guy must be on the edge of sanity. It would be enough to drive a lesser man to drink.

If the AFL give medals to Mitchell & Cotchin, then those players can presumably sue for lost earnings, loss of enjoyment of life, etc etc. AFL don't want that. If the AFL don't give medals for 2012, the record books will always have that empty line there. In years to come ... 50 or 100 even ... people will want to know why. And they will remember what EFC and the AFL did in the years 2011-2016. The AFL DEFINITELY don't want that.

Fair go Satyr. The military industrial complex has been busy making sure the truth about 9/11 and the international Jewish bank conglomerate/world government never comes out. Even though they control the whole world, they still have limited resources. They've only just now got to item #3 (Zaka and his "fear of needles").

If you're going to take that attitude then it's clear nothing can convince you of anything, ever. I see your game. You want a job sitting on the AFL drug tribunal!

I agree they've got a strong case. But think of the principled mob they'll be arguing it to. Might as well write a letter to Santa. It'll have the same impact. (Tthey might get their wish, or a lump of coal.) The AFLPA will be very keen to argue the point, unless Gil tells them that they're in fact not keen to argue it.

Who would they strongly argue that to? The Anti Fairness League The About Face League The Awfully Fickle League The Arbitrarily Functioning League Gil wouldn't even break stride

And that might be the reason why the AFL doesn't award them the medal. Can't sue for 4 years of lost "Brownlow winner" earnings if they never won it.

Satyr, it's Remembrance Day. No need to remind us of your horrific ignorance on the subject of drugs in sport.

Encounter an unprecedented drug regime and ask no questions Allow a quack to inject unknown stuff into you without checking with ASADA Let this happen multiple times Avoid telling drug testers that you're taking anything at all (apart from Panadol) Run away from the captaincy to swill beer at the Ashes Take your sweet time not doing the obvious, ie handing it back All class

Scene: AFL house. Gil McLachlan is dancing around his office. GM: Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! (The door opens, Mark Evans enters) ME: what's up Gil? what's all the racket? Are you on that web site I showed you again? GM: Yes! Yes! Y-- oh, it's you, Mark. Great news. Unbelievable news. Really incredible. And no-one saw it coming! ME: Are you talking about the US election? I didn't think you were a Trump guy. GM: Oh, it's not that. It's better than that. (sings) It's the eye of the tiger, it's the cream of the crop ... dut! ..... dut-dut-dut! ....... dut-dut-dut! ....... dut-dut-dahhhhhhhhh! (he starts shadow boxing) ME: Well? GM: It's Jobe, mate! He gave it back! He gave it back! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! It's the eye of the -- ME: I wouldn't have thought that's good news. Nothing to do with that whole mess is good news. GM: Yes, but it means I don't have to ... to make a ...... to ... to make a ... ME: What? GM: (whispers) ... the "D" word! ME: Decision? GM: Don't say it! Don't say it! You'll ruin the moment! ME: You know what this means, don't you? GM: Yes! I don't have to make a ......... dut! ........ dut-dut-dut! ..... ME: It means now we have to work out what to do about Mitchell and Cotchin. (GM freezes on the spot and turns white as a sheet) GM: You mean ..... it's the "D" word after all? ME: Yes. GM: Oh my god. Now I know how Hillary Clinton feels. ME: Come on Gil. Get a grip. Remember the other "D" word. GM: You're right. Get a grip Gil. You can see a way through this. You can-- I've got it!!! ME: What? GM: Find me two women who can be crazy girlfriends. It seems Mitchell and Cotchin might have hidden from drug testers in 2012! ME: Huh? An investigation of that could take years ... Of course! I take my hat off. You're a genius. GM: No, Mark. I'm better than that. I'm a Deal Maker.

And sure enough, on SEN ... this shows what amazing integrity he has. What a guy. If only he'd showed such amazing integrity when Dank was handing out his elephant juice, this whole thing might never have occurred. Well done, noble upstanding Jobe! (Not.)

They tried that at first. A beautiful Han dynasty porcelain horse's head. Gil was delighted. After that they realised they may have erred. So they've stepped it up a notch. Next will be threatening to drop Gil from the Town & Country polo team.

Look, Gil's under enormous pressure. You know his brother was trampled by a horse? That horse is owned by an Essendon coterie group. It was a warning. Gil knows he could be next, unless ...

In letting it get this far, the AFL have already shown the strength of their moral fibre. One thing that might explain his failure to do so could be that someone at AFL headquarters has told him they'll swing things so he can keep it. However that in turn exposes Jobe's moral fibre ... he shouldn't need to be told by anyone what he should do. There is one course of action. I have heard that athletes competing in Olympic sports here in Oz are stupefied by the entire EFC saga and the non-actions of the AFL. A 16 year old gymnastic had a gold medal stripped for taking two cold tablets. But Jobe can keep his Charlie? The AFL will rightly be a laughing stock.

I reckon Jobe was given a nod and a wink by the AFL early on in the saga that the Charlie was not at risk. That they'd pull strings, get the players off, voila, Charlie is a non issue. Now, the delay is all about how they reconcile that with the players going down and all avenues of appeal exhausted. Imagine if a p!ssed off Jobe went public...

"Before I answer, let me review the Dogs TV ratings and gate revenues."