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Friday Funnies

Featured Replies

http://humour.bluehaze.com.au/show.php?wk=2004_03_19

Magpie Magic

SPECIAL OFFER!!!

Buy one Collingwood football team, and we'll throw in a towel.

What do you do for a drowning Collingwood player?

Nothing. You could drag him to the top, but he'll choke anyway.

What's the difference between Collingwood and an arsonist?

An arsonist wouldn't waste 22 matches .

Collingwood are bringing out a new bra.

Plenty of support but no CUP.

Did you hear that the post office has had to recall their latest stamps?

They had pictures of Collingwood players on them. People couldn't figure

out which side to spit on.

Did you hear about the politician that was found dead in a Collingwood jersey?

The police had to dress him up in womens underwear in order to save his

family from embarrassment.

A man meets a friend and sees that his friend's car is a total write off

and covered with leaves, grass, branches, dirt and blood. He asks his friend

'what's happened to your car?

"Well... " the friend responds, "I ran over Nathan Buckley".

"OK, " says the man, "that explains the blood ... but what about the leaves,

the grass, the branches and the dirt?"

"He tried to escape through the park"

What do Collingwood fans and sperm have in common?

One in a million has a chance of being a normal human being.

What do you have when the Collingwood cheer squad are buried up to their

necks in sand?

Not enough sand.

What's the difference between a dead dog on the road and a dead Collingwood

fan on the road?

There are skid marks in front of the dog.

You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and Eddie McGuire. You

have a gun with 2 bullets. What do you do?

Shoot Eddie twice.

How many Collingwood fans does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it, five to moan about it and make excuses and Mick

Malthouse to say that if the umpire had done his job in the first place the

light bulb would never have gone out!

SPECIAL OFFER ... Buy one Collingwood football team, and we'll throw in

a towel.

 

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

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    Melbourne’s slow starts have been a troubling theme for a while. Against the Suns, they started slowly in both of their games, they trailed by 5.7.37 to 0.1.1 at quarter time at Peoples First Stadium in Round 16. This season, the story has remained the same and if the Demons fail to shake off this issue against the unbeaten Gold Coast Suns, they will be in serious danger of capitulating once again in their Easter Sunday showdown.

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  • NON-MFC: Round 04

    Round 4 of the 2026 AFL Premiership Season is upon us and it is the last week of the early season byes. Who are you tipping this week and what are the best results for the Dees Finals chances? 😜

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  • PREGAME: Gold Coast

    The Demons are back at the MCG for the second week in a row. They face the Suns off a 15 day break without their prized recruit and former Demon champion Christian Petracca. This will be a massive test for the Demons who will be facing a genuine Premiership contender. Who comes in and who goes out?

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  • REPORT: Carlton

    The text messages started flooding in shortly after quarter time. One read: “Is Melbourne even at the ground?” Moments later, as Carlton’s Elijah Hollands kicked the first goal of the second term, the Blues held a commanding 43-point lead. By then, the Demons’ only score was a behind kicked by Brody Mihocek nearly five minutes into the game. Ironically, Mihocek would also register the last minor score of the day after the game took a dramatic turnaround. 

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  • POSTGAME: Carlton

    The Demons snatched Victory form the Jaws of Defeat as they clawed their way back from 43 points down to win by 23 points in Max Gawn and Tom McDonald's 250th matches at the MCG. Never in Doubt!!!

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  • PODCAST: Carlton

    The Demonland Podcast will air LIVE on TUESDAY, 31st March @ 8:00pm. Join Binman, George & I as we dissect the Dees miraculous 66 point turnaround win against the Blues at the G.

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