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Posts posted by Josh

  1. 2 hours ago, Mazer Rackham said:

    To help manage your nerves and anxiety on the day, I have compiled a timetable of activities for you to follow.


    Fri 24 Sep
    Go to bed, sleep serenely in knowledge that demons are sure things and cannot lose.

    Sat 25 sep
    Wake up in cold sweat knowing deep in soul that we will suffer either a drubbing or a close heartbreaking loss.

    6:00 - 6:10
    Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

    Put on radio. Listen to experts pronouncing Doggies as sure things.

    6:15 - 6:30
    Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

    Go to kitchen, make soothing coffee.

    While waiting, check demonland for words of solace.

    Cheer up reading words of encouragement. Go back to kitchen. Discover cold coffee. Put in microwave.

    Check demonland. Read single post that puts chills of fear into soul.

    Shower to warm up.

    Continue shower to contemplate horror of after-match celebrations of Doggies.

    Run out of hot water. Get out and get dressed. Suffer crippling paralysis at thought of Bailey Smith winning the Norm Smith.

    Finish getting dressed.

    Go to kitchen, get cold coffee out of microwave. Pour into sink, start again.

    Check mail. Nothing.

    Check messages on phone. Note some good luck messages, become utterly psychically eradicated by one mocking taunt from close friend.

    Go to bathroom. Wet towel is evidence of already having showered. Leave bathroom.

    Go for walk to calm nerves.

    A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

    Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

    Stupid meditation. Remember coffee. Put in microwave.

    Go outside.

    Go back inside.

    Go outside.

    Wave to Collingwood supporting neighbour. Return wave. Take no comfort from encouraging words from neighbour. Suffer wave of nausea imagining neighbour's post-match taunts.

    Go back inside.

    Check demonland.

    Watch television. It's all crap.

    Check demonland.

    Drag self out of depression. Get cold coffee from microwave. Throw out. Put on kettle for new coffee.

    Check demonland.

    Shake self out of torpor and anxiety. Go outside to do some gardening.

    Spray weedkiller on plants. Get hose and wash off. Get water everywhere. Pull up weeds by design, plants by accident. Dump weeds, plants, weedkiller, fertlizer, gloves, in bin. Go inside and change clothes.

    Check demonland.

    Go outside.

    Go back inside.

    Go on walking inspection of house interior.

    Inspection complete. Check demonland. Feel nagging anxiety increase.

    Check phone. Fail to cheer up over cheering messages, hit maximum anxiety over jeering messages.

    Check demonland.

    Go outside.

    Go back inside.

    Watch  television. It's all crap.

    Go for walk to calm nerves.

    A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

    Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

    Stupid meditation. Remember cold coffee. Put in microwave.

    Make lunch in spite of no appetite.

    Sit down for lunch.

    Throw uneaten lunch in bin. Put kettle on for coffee.

    Check Bunnings web site. Order seeds, potting mix, gardening gloves and stanley knife.

    Check demonland.

    Go outside.

    Go back inside.

    Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

    Stupid meditation. Re-boil kettle.

    Search for old footy to have a kick to settle nerves.

    Find footy. Discover laces old and broken. Search for pump.

    Find pump. Pump up footy. Bladder bulges out where laces disintegrated. Throw footy in bin.

    Check demonland.

    Re-boil kettle.

    Remember the sun is over the yardarm. Check supply of spirits. Whiskey!

    Fret that whiskey supply is low. Check web site for nearest Dan's or BWS.

    Drive to bottle shop. Pick up whiskey.

    Re-boil kettle.

    Get message from Bunnings that order is ready for collection.

    Get in car, drive to Bunnings, pick up order. Note number of cars with Doggies scarves. Anxiety level to 90%.

    Re-boil kettle. Turn on tv for pre-match warmup shows. They're all crap.

    Re-boil kettle, make coffee. Add whiskey. Ahhhhh.

    Discover nerves are at 100% fever pitch despite whiskey. Go outside.

    Go back inside.

    Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

    Stupid meditation. Check demonland.

    Nearly game time. Panic attack. Boil kettle for coffee. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

    Make coffee. Trembling hands spill it everywhere. Re-boil kettle. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

    Watch players warm up. Sooth jangled nerves by cheering demons and booing dogs. Desperately try to ascertain clues to performance by how the players jog sideways, roll the ball on the ground, etc. Anxiety increase to 150%.

    Anthem and other frippery. Rage at universe for making you wait.

    Game on! Watch as demons tear the dogs a new one. Race around living room with each goal as Demons pile on a record score. Catharsis, and all emotion is replaced by a joyful high.

    Rejoice as the demons hoist the cup. Laugh, cry, text friends, take straight shot of whiskey. Take another straight shot of whiskey.

    Check demonland.

    Sunday 26 sep
    Go to bed. Fail to sleep.

    Glad it's not just me that boils the kettle 6 times before remembering to make a cup of tea and then forget about it anyway 😂😂😂

    • Haha 1
  2. 12 hours ago, Fanatique Demon said:

    Like this?

    B:        AC/DC.                   KILLERS.               ALICE COOPER

    HB:    WOLFMOTHER.     FOO FIGHTERS.          BOWIE 

    C:       SILVERCHAIR        BEATLES.            BLACK SABBATH

    HF:     NIRVANA.           PEARL JAM.                 OASIS

    F:       INXS.                  THE STONES               SPIDERBAIT





    That's a strong spine, AA ruck and hasn't Sabbath just filled a hole on the wing nicely.

    Hopefully we don't get drug tested this week though 🤷🏽‍♂️

    • Haha 3
  3. I don't know what the hell I'm gonna do if we make it. 2 weeks of build up is enormous. 

    The last 4 matches have been decided by a kick in the last 60 odd seconds and the one before that was a final. Take about modern day rivalry.

    I'm so pumped I could run through a brick wall. I can only imagine how the players feel.

    On an unrelated topic I have some chicken thighs, skin on and bone in, brining in a hot sauce and Italian dressing mix to go on the smoker this afternoon. Chicken and salad for dinner sounds divine, beautiful weather up here in north east Victoria and we are out of lockdown so I might to to duck in for a sneaky schooie 

    • Like 7
  4. Always felt this was fitting. They kicked us around for long enough and now they have woken the demon...




    Edit: Slight language warning. If you think young people listen to "head banging crap" and use sayings like "you can't understand what they're saying" don't bother... It's head banging crap and you can't understand what they're saying


    • Like 2
    • Haha 1
  5. 7 minutes ago, Chook said:

    I hope so. He has become a sidekick to Oliver over the past 12 weeks. Time to just reassert your dominance my man.

    I don't think there's any egos left in our side. Sometimes I wish Trac and sometimes Kozzy would be more selfish because they are such rare talents but they are playing a selfless game all of them, and that's obviously what it takes to finish on top...


    Hopefully it's enough to go all the way?

  6. On 8/23/2021 at 5:30 PM, D Rev said:

    Who is the second tall then?  Fritch is mid sized. 

    Melksham stopped playing 4 quarter footy last year (at least) - he won't cut it in finals. Even injured, McDonald is better than Jake. He has kicked 30 goals this year and his fitness (when fit) has been the sort of thing you need to win finals.

    McDonald is obviously suffering from the back injury related to flying up and down the east coast of Australia before the Suns game.  Probably not the time for an aerial tour of Australia, but who am I to judge?

    I've almost gained faith in selectors this year.  If they pick McDonald, then he is right to play and part of our best 22.

    Brown and Jackson... Although I like your argument, think I'll retract my comment 🤝

    • Like 1
  7. 2 minutes ago, monoccular said:

    I tend to agree, though he does sometimes pull something out of the bag.  Who would replace him - Weed?


    I'd go smaller. Melksham or Jordan (I prefer Melksham) 


    I think we've played out best footy with 2 talls

    • Like 1
  8. Umpiring decisions across the board have been disgusting this year. And there's nothing to hold them publicly accountable. Players and players can't say much and any media personality that wants that almighty AFL to throw them a bone knows to keep their trap shut.

    When it's a player/coach underperforming they are crucified, it's not fair.

    I have had to start pointing out all the obvious non frees/frees that go in our favour otherwise I'd go insane.

    • Like 4
  9. 11 minutes ago, Sir Why You Little said:

    I am not ok with 2 weeks, for all the reasons you have mentioned above. The AFL Tribunal is an absolute dog’s breakfast. 
    Why did Franklin get off? Sydney would have lost last week without him playing. 
    I hope the MFC make Enquiries about this Clown ? School 

    Couldn't agree more. I meant I'm ok with it being 2 weeks, same as Franklin, Ablett (twice) Cotchin, Mitchell bla BLA BLA what does it matter they make it up as they go along. 

    As someone said, he was better of punching him

    • Like 5
  10. 10 minutes ago, Sir Why You Little said:

    Yes I find it amazing that Franklin got off his charge. The ramifications of a flying elbow could be enormous. But that seems to be irrelevant 

    Viney was stupid. But it didn’t warrant 2 weeks


    I'm ok with the 2 weeks, it's ridiculous and has no place, as long as that becomes the standard to witch all else are measured. It's the blatant double standards that needs to be held accountable.

    This isn't a mistake, or a miss interpretation/classification. They sent him straight in, to be made an example, while other get off free. 

    Ill never forget Tom Mitchell running back the the center after a North Melbourne goal, jumping 2ft off the ground to elbow Goldstein in the back of the head, while he's not looking, in-between play, he had to run 25m to catch up and premeditate his actions...

    And he goes in to win a brownlow...



    • Like 1
  11. That a load of crap, 2 weeks for a "bad look" well good luck defining a "bad look" AFL make this crap up as they go, they are a joke.

    Geelong have played their last 4 "home finals" (which itself is a joke) at the MCG... I'll bet anything you like if they get a home final against us it'll be down there.

    Sick of being the push overs, hope someone takes a stand against this crap, we constantly ask players to take a stand on weekends yet the leaders of this club just lube themselves up to make it easier on AFL house






    • Like 5
    • Angry 2
  12. Is it going to be clear? When was the last time we played on a nice clear day and let our skills shine? (Pardon the pun)

    The better side wins today, r points and move on. Let's start building towards a finals campaign. Gawn full time ruck, Trac and Clarry I'm the middle, Gus back tia wing, pork ribs on the smoker... Back to normal you know?


    • Like 3
  13. Me and my wife won an auction for my 2 sons (8 and 6) for their birthdays to meet and greet Petracca and we done it today. 

    He was amazingly generous with his time and was genuinely interested to hear about their auskick and their school, friends and anything else they wanted to walk about. Heaps of photos and a couple of signed gurnseys.

    Absolute class act, can not speak highly enough.

    • Like 19
    • Love 3
  14. Everyone - Happy playing role


    Some roles mean you get 6 disposals and run to clog up space all day. Some mean you get 30+ and kick 3

    Some take 10 intercepts, some just defend space.

    This is a team that understand what they do for each other. Nothing proves this better than Gus Brayshaw. Drafted as probably the second best midfielder in his year, finishes third in the brownlow playing as an inside mid. And now asked to run lanes up and down the dead wing as a defensive mid. He, or more importantly his attitude, is the reason we are winning. 

    He should be very proud.


    • Like 14
    • Love 2
  15. 18 minutes ago, Ethan Trembley said:

    Did you tell her that Essendon haven’t won a final in 6138 days and if they take that long again to win one she’ll probably be dead before wishing her a nice day and walking off? 

    Hahah. Nah when she opens the "Melbourne Herald" she'll see "those silver tails" on top, that'll do me 



    • Like 1
  16. Ok you seriously can't make this stuff up;

    Went to inflatable world for a kids birthday today and we parked and hoped out. Kids are 6 and 8 and head to toe in Dee's gear proud we are finally having a win.

    Car next to us this older lady (60ish sorry to those who don't think that's old) hops out and goes "oh demons? Boo"

    I couldn't believe it, no wonder they get a bad name!?!

    • Like 5
    • Haha 2
    • Shocked 2
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