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Discussion on recent allegations about the use of illicit drugs in football is forbidden

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  1. It's time for a regime change at the Dees. The status quo cannot continue. The club needs to be radical & bring in the best people available from around the world to turn around the club's performance: President - Kim Jong-Un A young leader who has a great ability to rally the troops. A hard taskmaster but universally loved and respected. He would bring in an influx of new members & surely give us a cutting edge in football's arms race. CEO - Bernie Madoff A financial guru with a proven ability to generate mountains of cash with minimal investment. He may have to undertake his position via correspondence due to some current commitments in the USA but unlike past CEO's like McNamee he isn't time poor. Coach - Gordon Bombay Like Brendan McCartney at the Bulldogs he didn't play AFL at the highest level. However, he is a great man manager & has a great gameplan. Headlines of the 'Flying Dees' would be just around the corner. Recruiting manager - Joseph Kony A proven eye for securing talented youth. List manager - Homer Simpson With so many middle of the road players on the list Homer would be delighted to oversee the cut. Sports science - Stephen Dank & Lance Armstrong Would inject a real sense of competitiveness into the playing group. Social committee - Lindsay Lohan & Brendan Fevola Would head up the crucial end of season bonding trips and would plan after match functions for Demons members. Would put the fun back into social functions. Opposition analyst - Austin Powers An international man of mystery, Powers could sneak into the most closed of opposition training sessions. Would have to keep him away from our player's wives & girlfriends but his talents in this area could also put the wind up the opposition. Media manager - Muhammed Saeed al-Sahhaf Better known as Comical Ali. A former Iraqi information minister, he has proven himself adept at media relations & PR in the face of incredible adversity. Junior Ambassadors - The Wiggles Like the Pied Piper of Hamlin, they have hypnotic & mystical powers. Would secure the club a never ending supply of junior members. They would look fantastic in red & blue skivvies. These are but some of the changes that could make this club a real force. Who else should we look at for key positions at the club?
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