Grand Final Day - What will you do?

[WalkingCivilWar 31,101]

9 hours ago, danielE288 said:

Is anyone sneakily going to go to a family members or freinds house to watch it?

 

I’ll be watching it by myself. It’s all good though. I’m not pleasant to be around during H&A games let alone a grand final. My son lives in Footscray and while he doesn’t get into footy, he wants to come and watch it with me but I’ve discouraged him. I don’t wanna be that person. 

[Mazer Rackham 14,968]

To help manage your nerves and anxiety on the day, I have compiled a timetable of activities for you to follow.

 

Fri 24 Sep
11pm
Go to bed, sleep serenely in knowledge that demons are sure things and cannot lose.

Sat 25 sep
6am
Wake up in cold sweat knowing deep in soul that we will suffer either a drubbing or a close heartbreaking loss.

6:00 - 6:10
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:11
Put on radio. Listen to experts pronouncing Doggies as sure things.

6:15 - 6:30
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:35
Go to kitchen, make soothing coffee.

6:36
While waiting, check demonland for words of solace.

7:15
Cheer up reading words of encouragement. Go back to kitchen. Discover cold coffee. Put in microwave.

7:16
Check demonland. Read single post that puts chills of fear into soul.

7:20
Shower to warm up.

7:25
Continue shower to contemplate horror of after-match celebrations of Doggies.

7:45
Run out of hot water. Get out and get dressed. Suffer crippling paralysis at thought of Bailey Smith winning the Norm Smith.

8:05
Finish getting dressed.

8:06
Go to kitchen, get cold coffee out of microwave. Pour into sink, start again.

8:07
Check mail. Nothing.

8:08
Check messages on phone. Note some good luck messages, become utterly psychically eradicated by one mocking taunt from close friend.

8:10
Go to bathroom. Wet towel is evidence of already having showered. Leave bathroom.

8:15
Go for walk to calm nerves.

8:20
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

8:25
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

8:26
Stupid meditation. Remember coffee. Put in microwave.

8:27
Go outside.

8:28
Go back inside.

8:29
Go outside.

8:30
Wave to Collingwood supporting neighbour. Return wave. Take no comfort from encouraging words from neighbour. Suffer wave of nausea imagining neighbour's post-match taunts.

8:31
Go back inside.

8:32
Check demonland.

9:00
Watch television. It's all crap.

9:15
Check demonland.

10:45
Drag self out of depression. Get cold coffee from microwave. Throw out. Put on kettle for new coffee.

10:50
Check demonland.

11:00
Shake self out of torpor and anxiety. Go outside to do some gardening.

11:05
Spray weedkiller on plants. Get hose and wash off. Get water everywhere. Pull up weeds by design, plants by accident. Dump weeds, plants, weedkiller, fertlizer, gloves, in bin. Go inside and change clothes.

11:20
Check demonland.

11:40
Go outside.

11:41
Go back inside.

11:42
Go on walking inspection of house interior.

11:43
Inspection complete. Check demonland. Feel nagging anxiety increase.

12:05
Check phone. Fail to cheer up over cheering messages, hit maximum anxiety over jeering messages.

12:10
Check demonland.

12:40
Go outside.

12:41
Go back inside.

12:42
Watch  television. It's all crap.

13:00
Go for walk to calm nerves.

13:05
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

13:10
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

13:11
Stupid meditation. Remember cold coffee. Put in microwave.

13:12
Make lunch in spite of no appetite.

13:30
Sit down for lunch.

13:40
Throw uneaten lunch in bin. Put kettle on for coffee.

13:45
Check Bunnings web site. Order seeds, potting mix, gardening gloves and stanley knife.

14:00
Check demonland.

14:30
Go outside.

14:31
Go back inside.

14:32
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

14:33
Stupid meditation. Re-boil kettle.

14:44
Search for old footy to have a kick to settle nerves.

14:55
Find footy. Discover laces old and broken. Search for pump.

15:10
Find pump. Pump up footy. Bladder bulges out where laces disintegrated. Throw footy in bin.

15:15
Check demonland.

15:45
Re-boil kettle.

15:46
Remember the sun is over the yardarm. Check supply of spirits. Whiskey!

15:47
Fret that whiskey supply is low. Check web site for nearest Dan's or BWS.

15:55
Drive to bottle shop. Pick up whiskey.

16:25
Re-boil kettle.

16:30
Get message from Bunnings that order is ready for collection.

16:32
Get in car, drive to Bunnings, pick up order. Note number of cars with Doggies scarves. Anxiety level to 90%.

17:15
Re-boil kettle. Turn on tv for pre-match warmup shows. They're all crap.

18:00
Re-boil kettle, make coffee. Add whiskey. Ahhhhh.

18:10
Discover nerves are at 100% fever pitch despite whiskey. Go outside.

18:11
Go back inside.

18:12
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

18:13
Stupid meditation. Check demonland.

18:45
Nearly game time. Panic attack. Boil kettle for coffee. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

18:50
Make coffee. Trembling hands spill it everywhere. Re-boil kettle. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

19:00
Watch players warm up. Sooth jangled nerves by cheering demons and booing dogs. Desperately try to ascertain clues to performance by how the players jog sideways, roll the ball on the ground, etc. Anxiety increase to 150%.

19:10
Anthem and other frippery. Rage at universe for making you wait.

19:15
Game on! Watch as demons tear the dogs a new one. Race around living room with each goal as Demons pile on a record score. Catharsis, and all emotion is replaced by a joyful high.

10:00
Rejoice as the demons hoist the cup. Laugh, cry, text friends, take straight shot of whiskey. Take another straight shot of whiskey.

10:30
Check demonland.

Sunday 26 sep
03:00
Go to bed. Fail to sleep.

[Wrecker46 2,650]

Watching it with family who including myself have all been double vacinated. My daughter who is 7yo hasn't but she can't be.

Being going my whole life with them and had to sit through the last to GF's with them.

Not worried about a fine I'll win more on my pre season Melbourne bets anyway.

[Nicko 1,219]

30 minutes ago, Mazer Rackham said:

To help manage your nerves and anxiety on the day, I have compiled a timetable of activities for you to follow.

 

Fri 24 Sep
11pm
Go to bed, sleep serenely in knowledge that demons are sure things and cannot lose.

Sat 25 sep
6am
Wake up in cold sweat knowing deep in soul that we will suffer either a drubbing or a close heartbreaking loss.

6:00 - 6:10
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:11
Put on radio. Listen to experts pronouncing Doggies as sure things.

6:15 - 6:30
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:35
Go to kitchen, make soothing coffee.

6:36
While waiting, check demonland for words of solace.

7:15
Cheer up reading words of encouragement. Go back to kitchen. Discover cold coffee. Put in microwave.

7:16
Check demonland. Read single post that puts chills of fear into soul.

7:20
Shower to warm up.

7:25
Continue shower to contemplate horror of after-match celebrations of Doggies.

7:45
Run out of hot water. Get out and get dressed. Suffer crippling paralysis at thought of Bailey Smith winning the Norm Smith.

8:05
Finish getting dressed.

8:06
Go to kitchen, get cold coffee out of microwave. Pour into sink, start again.

8:07
Check mail. Nothing.

8:08
Check messages on phone. Note some good luck messages, become utterly psychically eradicated by one mocking taunt from close friend.

8:10
Go to bathroom. Wet towel is evidence of already having showered. Leave bathroom.

8:15
Go for walk to calm nerves.

8:20
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

8:25
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

8:26
Stupid meditation. Remember coffee. Put in microwave.

8:27
Go outside.

8:28
Go back inside.

8:29
Go outside.

8:30
Wave to Collingwood supporting neighbour. Return wave. Take no comfort from encouraging words from neighbour. Suffer wave of nausea imagining neighbour's post-match taunts.

8:31
Go back inside.

8:32
Check demonland.

9:00
Watch television. It's all crap.

9:15
Check demonland.

10:45
Drag self out of depression. Get cold coffee from microwave. Throw out. Put on kettle for new coffee.

10:50
Check demonland.

11:00
Shake self out of torpor and anxiety. Go outside to do some gardening.

11:05
Spray weedkiller on plants. Get hose and wash off. Get water everywhere. Pull up weeds by design, plants by accident. Dump weeds, plants, weedkiller, fertlizer, gloves, in bin. Go inside and change clothes.

11:20
Check demonland.

11:40
Go outside.

11:41
Go back inside.

11:42
Go on walking inspection of house interior.

11:43
Inspection complete. Check demonland. Feel nagging anxiety increase.

12:05
Check phone. Fail to cheer up over cheering messages, hit maximum anxiety over jeering messages.

12:10
Check demonland.

12:40
Go outside.

12:41
Go back inside.

12:42
Watch  television. It's all crap.

13:00
Go for walk to calm nerves.

13:05
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

13:10
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

13:11
Stupid meditation. Remember cold coffee. Put in microwave.

13:12
Make lunch in spite of no appetite.

13:30
Sit down for lunch.

13:40
Throw uneaten lunch in bin. Put kettle on for coffee.

13:45
Check Bunnings web site. Order seeds, potting mix, gardening gloves and stanley knife.

14:00
Check demonland.

14:30
Go outside.

14:31
Go back inside.

14:32
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

14:33
Stupid meditation. Re-boil kettle.

14:44
Search for old footy to have a kick to settle nerves.

14:55
Find footy. Discover laces old and broken. Search for pump.

15:10
Find pump. Pump up footy. Bladder bulges out where laces disintegrated. Throw footy in bin.

15:15
Check demonland.

15:45
Re-boil kettle.

15:46
Remember the sun is over the yardarm. Check supply of spirits. Whiskey!

15:47
Fret that whiskey supply is low. Check web site for nearest Dan's or BWS.

15:55
Drive to bottle shop. Pick up whiskey.

16:25
Re-boil kettle.

16:30
Get message from Bunnings that order is ready for collection.

16:32
Get in car, drive to Bunnings, pick up order. Note number of cars with Doggies scarves. Anxiety level to 90%.

17:15
Re-boil kettle. Turn on tv for pre-match warmup shows. They're all crap.

18:00
Re-boil kettle, make coffee. Add whiskey. Ahhhhh.

18:10
Discover nerves are at 100% fever pitch despite whiskey. Go outside.

18:11
Go back inside.

18:12
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

18:13
Stupid meditation. Check demonland.

18:45
Nearly game time. Panic attack. Boil kettle for coffee. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

18:50
Make coffee. Trembling hands spill it everywhere. Re-boil kettle. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

19:00
Watch players warm up. Sooth jangled nerves by cheering demons and booing dogs. Desperately try to ascertain clues to performance by how the players jog sideways, roll the ball on the ground, etc. Anxiety increase to 150%.

19:10
Anthem and other frippery. Rage at universe for making you wait.

19:15
Game on! Watch as demons tear the dogs a new one. Race around living room with each goal as Demons pile on a record score. Catharsis, and all emotion is replaced by a joyful high.

10:00
Rejoice as the demons hoist the cup. Laugh, cry, text friends, take straight shot of whiskey. Take another straight shot of whiskey.

10:30
Check demonland.

Sunday 26 sep
03:00
Go to bed. Fail to sleep.

that is gold!

Only four shots of whiskey 🥃 

🤣

[Jaded No More 57,583]

If I’m not drunk by midday, I’ve played the day out very badly. 
 

[darkhorse72 1,718]

1 hour ago, deva5610 said:

The trains are awesome. Station right at the stadium and public transport is included with your game day ticket.

yeah, we normally park over in East Perth and walk, which is also nice and less cramped. 

[Cards13 9,117]

1 hour ago, Mazer Rackham said:

To help manage your nerves and anxiety on the day, I have compiled a timetable of activities for you to follow.

 

Fri 24 Sep
11pm
Go to bed, sleep serenely in knowledge that demons are sure things and cannot lose.

Sat 25 sep
6am
Wake up in cold sweat knowing deep in soul that we will suffer either a drubbing or a close heartbreaking loss.

6:00 - 6:10
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:11
Put on radio. Listen to experts pronouncing Doggies as sure things.

6:15 - 6:30
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:35
Go to kitchen, make soothing coffee.

6:36
While waiting, check demonland for words of solace.

7:15
Cheer up reading words of encouragement. Go back to kitchen. Discover cold coffee. Put in microwave.

7:16
Check demonland. Read single post that puts chills of fear into soul.

7:20
Shower to warm up.

7:25
Continue shower to contemplate horror of after-match celebrations of Doggies.

7:45
Run out of hot water. Get out and get dressed. Suffer crippling paralysis at thought of Bailey Smith winning the Norm Smith.

8:05
Finish getting dressed.

8:06
Go to kitchen, get cold coffee out of microwave. Pour into sink, start again.

8:07
Check mail. Nothing.

8:08
Check messages on phone. Note some good luck messages, become utterly psychically eradicated by one mocking taunt from close friend.

8:10
Go to bathroom. Wet towel is evidence of already having showered. Leave bathroom.

8:15
Go for walk to calm nerves.

8:20
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

8:25
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

8:26
Stupid meditation. Remember coffee. Put in microwave.

8:27
Go outside.

8:28
Go back inside.

8:29
Go outside.

8:30
Wave to Collingwood supporting neighbour. Return wave. Take no comfort from encouraging words from neighbour. Suffer wave of nausea imagining neighbour's post-match taunts.

8:31
Go back inside.

8:32
Check demonland.

9:00
Watch television. It's all crap.

9:15
Check demonland.

10:45
Drag self out of depression. Get cold coffee from microwave. Throw out. Put on kettle for new coffee.

10:50
Check demonland.

11:00
Shake self out of torpor and anxiety. Go outside to do some gardening.

11:05
Spray weedkiller on plants. Get hose and wash off. Get water everywhere. Pull up weeds by design, plants by accident. Dump weeds, plants, weedkiller, fertlizer, gloves, in bin. Go inside and change clothes.

11:20
Check demonland.

11:40
Go outside.

11:41
Go back inside.

11:42
Go on walking inspection of house interior.

11:43
Inspection complete. Check demonland. Feel nagging anxiety increase.

12:05
Check phone. Fail to cheer up over cheering messages, hit maximum anxiety over jeering messages.

12:10
Check demonland.

12:40
Go outside.

12:41
Go back inside.

12:42
Watch  television. It's all crap.

13:00
Go for walk to calm nerves.

13:05
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

13:10
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

13:11
Stupid meditation. Remember cold coffee. Put in microwave.

13:12
Make lunch in spite of no appetite.

13:30
Sit down for lunch.

13:40
Throw uneaten lunch in bin. Put kettle on for coffee.

13:45
Check Bunnings web site. Order seeds, potting mix, gardening gloves and stanley knife.

14:00
Check demonland.

14:30
Go outside.

14:31
Go back inside.

14:32
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

14:33
Stupid meditation. Re-boil kettle.

14:44
Search for old footy to have a kick to settle nerves.

14:55
Find footy. Discover laces old and broken. Search for pump.

15:10
Find pump. Pump up footy. Bladder bulges out where laces disintegrated. Throw footy in bin.

15:15
Check demonland.

15:45
Re-boil kettle.

15:46
Remember the sun is over the yardarm. Check supply of spirits. Whiskey!

15:47
Fret that whiskey supply is low. Check web site for nearest Dan's or BWS.

15:55
Drive to bottle shop. Pick up whiskey.

16:25
Re-boil kettle.

16:30
Get message from Bunnings that order is ready for collection.

16:32
Get in car, drive to Bunnings, pick up order. Note number of cars with Doggies scarves. Anxiety level to 90%.

17:15
Re-boil kettle. Turn on tv for pre-match warmup shows. They're all crap.

18:00
Re-boil kettle, make coffee. Add whiskey. Ahhhhh.

18:10
Discover nerves are at 100% fever pitch despite whiskey. Go outside.

18:11
Go back inside.

18:12
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

18:13
Stupid meditation. Check demonland.

18:45
Nearly game time. Panic attack. Boil kettle for coffee. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

18:50
Make coffee. Trembling hands spill it everywhere. Re-boil kettle. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

19:00
Watch players warm up. Sooth jangled nerves by cheering demons and booing dogs. Desperately try to ascertain clues to performance by how the players jog sideways, roll the ball on the ground, etc. Anxiety increase to 150%.

19:10
Anthem and other frippery. Rage at universe for making you wait.

19:15
Game on! Watch as demons tear the dogs a new one. Race around living room with each goal as Demons pile on a record score. Catharsis, and all emotion is replaced by a joyful high.

10:00
Rejoice as the demons hoist the cup. Laugh, cry, text friends, take straight shot of whiskey. Take another straight shot of whiskey.

10:30
Check demonland.

Sunday 26 sep
03:00
Go to bed. Fail to sleep.

18:00… gold. 

[WalkingCivilWar 31,101]

1 hour ago, Mazer Rackham said:

To help manage your nerves and anxiety on the day, I have compiled a timetable of activities for you to follow.

 

Fri 24 Sep
11pm
Go to bed, sleep serenely in knowledge that demons are sure things and cannot lose.

Sat 25 sep
6am
Wake up in cold sweat knowing deep in soul that we will suffer either a drubbing or a close heartbreaking loss.

6:00 - 6:10
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:11
Put on radio. Listen to experts pronouncing Doggies as sure things.

6:15 - 6:30
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:35
Go to kitchen, make soothing coffee.

6:36
While waiting, check demonland for words of solace.

7:15
Cheer up reading words of encouragement. Go back to kitchen. Discover cold coffee. Put in microwave.

7:16
Check demonland. Read single post that puts chills of fear into soul.

7:20
Shower to warm up.

7:25
Continue shower to contemplate horror of after-match celebrations of Doggies.

7:45
Run out of hot water. Get out and get dressed. Suffer crippling paralysis at thought of Bailey Smith winning the Norm Smith.

8:05
Finish getting dressed.

8:06
Go to kitchen, get cold coffee out of microwave. Pour into sink, start again.

8:07
Check mail. Nothing.

8:08
Check messages on phone. Note some good luck messages, become utterly psychically eradicated by one mocking taunt from close friend.

8:10
Go to bathroom. Wet towel is evidence of already having showered. Leave bathroom.

8:15
Go for walk to calm nerves.

8:20
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

8:25
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

8:26
Stupid meditation. Remember coffee. Put in microwave.

8:27
Go outside.

8:28
Go back inside.

8:29
Go outside.

8:30
Wave to Collingwood supporting neighbour. Return wave. Take no comfort from encouraging words from neighbour. Suffer wave of nausea imagining neighbour's post-match taunts.

8:31
Go back inside.

8:32
Check demonland.

9:00
Watch television. It's all crap.

9:15
Check demonland.

10:45
Drag self out of depression. Get cold coffee from microwave. Throw out. Put on kettle for new coffee.

10:50
Check demonland.

11:00
Shake self out of torpor and anxiety. Go outside to do some gardening.

11:05
Spray weedkiller on plants. Get hose and wash off. Get water everywhere. Pull up weeds by design, plants by accident. Dump weeds, plants, weedkiller, fertlizer, gloves, in bin. Go inside and change clothes.

11:20
Check demonland.

11:40
Go outside.

11:41
Go back inside.

11:42
Go on walking inspection of house interior.

11:43
Inspection complete. Check demonland. Feel nagging anxiety increase.

12:05
Check phone. Fail to cheer up over cheering messages, hit maximum anxiety over jeering messages.

12:10
Check demonland.

12:40
Go outside.

12:41
Go back inside.

12:42
Watch  television. It's all crap.

13:00
Go for walk to calm nerves.

13:05
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

13:10
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

13:11
Stupid meditation. Remember cold coffee. Put in microwave.

13:12
Make lunch in spite of no appetite.

13:30
Sit down for lunch.

13:40
Throw uneaten lunch in bin. Put kettle on for coffee.

13:45
Check Bunnings web site. Order seeds, potting mix, gardening gloves and stanley knife.

14:00
Check demonland.

14:30
Go outside.

14:31
Go back inside.

14:32
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

14:33
Stupid meditation. Re-boil kettle.

14:44
Search for old footy to have a kick to settle nerves.

14:55
Find footy. Discover laces old and broken. Search for pump.

15:10
Find pump. Pump up footy. Bladder bulges out where laces disintegrated. Throw footy in bin.

15:15
Check demonland.

15:45
Re-boil kettle.

15:46
Remember the sun is over the yardarm. Check supply of spirits. Whiskey!

15:47
Fret that whiskey supply is low. Check web site for nearest Dan's or BWS.

15:55
Drive to bottle shop. Pick up whiskey.

16:25
Re-boil kettle.

16:30
Get message from Bunnings that order is ready for collection.

16:32
Get in car, drive to Bunnings, pick up order. Note number of cars with Doggies scarves. Anxiety level to 90%.

17:15
Re-boil kettle. Turn on tv for pre-match warmup shows. They're all crap.

18:00
Re-boil kettle, make coffee. Add whiskey. Ahhhhh.

18:10
Discover nerves are at 100% fever pitch despite whiskey. Go outside.

18:11
Go back inside.

18:12
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

18:13
Stupid meditation. Check demonland.

18:45
Nearly game time. Panic attack. Boil kettle for coffee. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

18:50
Make coffee. Trembling hands spill it everywhere. Re-boil kettle. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

19:00
Watch players warm up. Sooth jangled nerves by cheering demons and booing dogs. Desperately try to ascertain clues to performance by how the players jog sideways, roll the ball on the ground, etc. Anxiety increase to 150%.

19:10
Anthem and other frippery. Rage at universe for making you wait.

19:15
Game on! Watch as demons tear the dogs a new one. Race around living room with each goal as Demons pile on a record score. Catharsis, and all emotion is replaced by a joyful high.

10:00
Rejoice as the demons hoist the cup. Laugh, cry, text friends, take straight shot of whiskey. Take another straight shot of whiskey.

10:30
Check demonland.

Sunday 26 sep
03:00
Go to bed. Fail to sleep.

So despite making numerous cups of coffee all of which ended up down the sink, the first one you actually drink is at 6pm and that’s only coz it had whiskey added. 😂

[Supreme_Demon 3,009]

I am already feeling nervous and anxious. Got 2 weeks to go!

I just wish this was being played at the MCG! I would have been there with my Dad.

As embarrassing as it sounds, I will be crying at the end of the Grand Final if we win or if we lose.

 

 

 

[Clayton van Oliver 1,658]

1 minute ago, Supreme_Demon said:

I am already feeling nervous and anxious. Got 2 weeks to go!

I just wish this was being played at the MCG! I would have been there with my Dad.

As embarrassing as it sounds, I will be crying at the end of the Grand Final if we win or if we lose.

 

 

 

Not embarrassing at all. "Bawling my eyes out if we win" is a dead-set certainty

[Engorged Onion 9,215]

2 minutes ago, Supreme_Demon said:

As embarrassing as it sounds, I will be crying at the end of the Grand Final if we win or if we lose.

Nothing embarrassing about having feelings @Supreme_Demon

Edited September 13, 2021 by Engorged Onion

[Stiff Arm 4,410]

If I cannot watch it at the G from my GFG seat with 100,000 others, will watch it at home alone. I will tell the family to leave me the [censored] alone during the game. I will be a mess, an absolute nervous mess.

[Mazer Rackham 14,968]

7 minutes ago, WalkingCivilWar said:

So despite making numerous cups of coffee all of which ended up down the sink, the first one you actually drink is at 6pm and that’s only coz it had whiskey added. 😂

Look, this is just a template. You can substitute brandy if you want.

[Cards13 9,117]

2 minutes ago, Mazer Rackham said:

Look, this is just a template. You can substitute brandy if you want.

🤢

[KLV 1,622]

It’s hard to know what I’ll do to kill the time before the game. Probably some form of Mazer’s day.

I really wish Dan would allow some big screens in parks etc or at the G for the fully vaccinated to watch together. It could be managed in a Covid safe way, and be such a great thing for us long locked down Melbournians .

if the govt think that people, particularly dees supporters won’t get together with family and friends to watch, they are seriously dreaming. 
I totally get why we need lockdowns etc, etc, as much as I loathe them, but I really don’t understand why we can’t allow things that can be done safely. I know it’s not fair for the unvaccinated, or those that haven’t had the opportunity yet, but what is fair about Covid? Instead I think we’ll get a big fat lecture and threats next week about not getting together for the GF.

 

[Demonstone 19,046]

Mazer and his elusive cup of coffee:

[dazzledavey36 48,619]

I've put leave for Friday and Monday.

Get on the [censored] Friday, watch the parade or whatever it is.

Wake up Saturday morning and get on the [censored] again, and decided whether to watch it at in laws or rustle up a couple of mates and put on a barby at home.

[Josh 1,420]

2 hours ago, Mazer Rackham said:

To help manage your nerves and anxiety on the day, I have compiled a timetable of activities for you to follow.

 

Fri 24 Sep
11pm
Go to bed, sleep serenely in knowledge that demons are sure things and cannot lose.

Sat 25 sep
6am
Wake up in cold sweat knowing deep in soul that we will suffer either a drubbing or a close heartbreaking loss.

6:00 - 6:10
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:11
Put on radio. Listen to experts pronouncing Doggies as sure things.

6:15 - 6:30
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:35
Go to kitchen, make soothing coffee.

6:36
While waiting, check demonland for words of solace.

7:15
Cheer up reading words of encouragement. Go back to kitchen. Discover cold coffee. Put in microwave.

7:16
Check demonland. Read single post that puts chills of fear into soul.

7:20
Shower to warm up.

7:25
Continue shower to contemplate horror of after-match celebrations of Doggies.

7:45
Run out of hot water. Get out and get dressed. Suffer crippling paralysis at thought of Bailey Smith winning the Norm Smith.

8:05
Finish getting dressed.

8:06
Go to kitchen, get cold coffee out of microwave. Pour into sink, start again.

8:07
Check mail. Nothing.

8:08
Check messages on phone. Note some good luck messages, become utterly psychically eradicated by one mocking taunt from close friend.

8:10
Go to bathroom. Wet towel is evidence of already having showered. Leave bathroom.

8:15
Go for walk to calm nerves.

8:20
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

8:25
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

8:26
Stupid meditation. Remember coffee. Put in microwave.

8:27
Go outside.

8:28
Go back inside.

8:29
Go outside.

8:30
Wave to Collingwood supporting neighbour. Return wave. Take no comfort from encouraging words from neighbour. Suffer wave of nausea imagining neighbour's post-match taunts.

8:31
Go back inside.

8:32
Check demonland.

9:00
Watch television. It's all crap.

9:15
Check demonland.

10:45
Drag self out of depression. Get cold coffee from microwave. Throw out. Put on kettle for new coffee.

10:50
Check demonland.

11:00
Shake self out of torpor and anxiety. Go outside to do some gardening.

11:05
Spray weedkiller on plants. Get hose and wash off. Get water everywhere. Pull up weeds by design, plants by accident. Dump weeds, plants, weedkiller, fertlizer, gloves, in bin. Go inside and change clothes.

11:20
Check demonland.

11:40
Go outside.

11:41
Go back inside.

11:42
Go on walking inspection of house interior.

11:43
Inspection complete. Check demonland. Feel nagging anxiety increase.

12:05
Check phone. Fail to cheer up over cheering messages, hit maximum anxiety over jeering messages.

12:10
Check demonland.

12:40
Go outside.

12:41
Go back inside.

12:42
Watch  television. It's all crap.

13:00
Go for walk to calm nerves.

13:05
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

13:10
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

13:11
Stupid meditation. Remember cold coffee. Put in microwave.

13:12
Make lunch in spite of no appetite.

13:30
Sit down for lunch.

13:40
Throw uneaten lunch in bin. Put kettle on for coffee.

13:45
Check Bunnings web site. Order seeds, potting mix, gardening gloves and stanley knife.

14:00
Check demonland.

14:30
Go outside.

14:31
Go back inside.

14:32
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

14:33
Stupid meditation. Re-boil kettle.

14:44
Search for old footy to have a kick to settle nerves.

14:55
Find footy. Discover laces old and broken. Search for pump.

15:10
Find pump. Pump up footy. Bladder bulges out where laces disintegrated. Throw footy in bin.

15:15
Check demonland.

15:45
Re-boil kettle.

15:46
Remember the sun is over the yardarm. Check supply of spirits. Whiskey!

15:47
Fret that whiskey supply is low. Check web site for nearest Dan's or BWS.

15:55
Drive to bottle shop. Pick up whiskey.

16:25
Re-boil kettle.

16:30
Get message from Bunnings that order is ready for collection.

16:32
Get in car, drive to Bunnings, pick up order. Note number of cars with Doggies scarves. Anxiety level to 90%.

17:15
Re-boil kettle. Turn on tv for pre-match warmup shows. They're all crap.

18:00
Re-boil kettle, make coffee. Add whiskey. Ahhhhh.

18:10
Discover nerves are at 100% fever pitch despite whiskey. Go outside.

18:11
Go back inside.

18:12
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

18:13
Stupid meditation. Check demonland.

18:45
Nearly game time. Panic attack. Boil kettle for coffee. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

18:50
Make coffee. Trembling hands spill it everywhere. Re-boil kettle. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

19:00
Watch players warm up. Sooth jangled nerves by cheering demons and booing dogs. Desperately try to ascertain clues to performance by how the players jog sideways, roll the ball on the ground, etc. Anxiety increase to 150%.

19:10
Anthem and other frippery. Rage at universe for making you wait.

19:15
Game on! Watch as demons tear the dogs a new one. Race around living room with each goal as Demons pile on a record score. Catharsis, and all emotion is replaced by a joyful high.

10:00
Rejoice as the demons hoist the cup. Laugh, cry, text friends, take straight shot of whiskey. Take another straight shot of whiskey.

10:30
Check demonland.

Sunday 26 sep
03:00
Go to bed. Fail to sleep.

Glad it's not just me that boils the kettle 6 times before remembering to make a cup of tea and then forget about it anyway 😂😂😂

Edited September 13, 2021 by Josh

[Little Goffy 12,489]

11 hours ago, danielE288 said:

Is anyone sneakily going to go to a family members or freinds house to watch it?

 

So... you're the reason the game is not in Melbourne, are you?

 

11 hours ago, Bombay Airconditioning said:

In NSW you can get between $300 - $800 for lagging on someone. 

I call BS. Send me a message if you have any basis for that claim, but let's not have any debate in a thread that is supposed to be about making the most of the situation we're all in.

[danielE288 576]

Just now, Little Goffy said:

So... you're the reason the game is not in Melbourne, are you?

 

I

I asked a question, I didn't say I would be doing it. I've barely left my home for 3 months.

[Little Goffy 12,489]

1 minute ago, danielE288 said:

I asked a question, I didn't say I would be doing it. I've barely left my home for 3 months.

Fair enough.

I'm a bit taut about it. Life in Sydney married to an Aged Care sector worker is f'n tense these days.

[Maldonboy38 5,807]

2 hours ago, Mazer Rackham said:

To help manage your nerves and anxiety on the day, I have compiled a timetable of activities for you to follow.

 

Fri 24 Sep
11pm
Go to bed, sleep serenely in knowledge that demons are sure things and cannot lose.

Sat 25 sep
6am
Wake up in cold sweat knowing deep in soul that we will suffer either a drubbing or a close heartbreaking loss.

6:00 - 6:10
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:11
Put on radio. Listen to experts pronouncing Doggies as sure things.

6:15 - 6:30
Lie in bed staring at ceiling trying to calm self down.

6:35
Go to kitchen, make soothing coffee.

6:36
While waiting, check demonland for words of solace.

7:15
Cheer up reading words of encouragement. Go back to kitchen. Discover cold coffee. Put in microwave.

7:16
Check demonland. Read single post that puts chills of fear into soul.

7:20
Shower to warm up.

7:25
Continue shower to contemplate horror of after-match celebrations of Doggies.

7:45
Run out of hot water. Get out and get dressed. Suffer crippling paralysis at thought of Bailey Smith winning the Norm Smith.

8:05
Finish getting dressed.

8:06
Go to kitchen, get cold coffee out of microwave. Pour into sink, start again.

8:07
Check mail. Nothing.

8:08
Check messages on phone. Note some good luck messages, become utterly psychically eradicated by one mocking taunt from close friend.

8:10
Go to bathroom. Wet towel is evidence of already having showered. Leave bathroom.

8:15
Go for walk to calm nerves.

8:20
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

8:25
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

8:26
Stupid meditation. Remember coffee. Put in microwave.

8:27
Go outside.

8:28
Go back inside.

8:29
Go outside.

8:30
Wave to Collingwood supporting neighbour. Return wave. Take no comfort from encouraging words from neighbour. Suffer wave of nausea imagining neighbour's post-match taunts.

8:31
Go back inside.

8:32
Check demonland.

9:00
Watch television. It's all crap.

9:15
Check demonland.

10:45
Drag self out of depression. Get cold coffee from microwave. Throw out. Put on kettle for new coffee.

10:50
Check demonland.

11:00
Shake self out of torpor and anxiety. Go outside to do some gardening.

11:05
Spray weedkiller on plants. Get hose and wash off. Get water everywhere. Pull up weeds by design, plants by accident. Dump weeds, plants, weedkiller, fertlizer, gloves, in bin. Go inside and change clothes.

11:20
Check demonland.

11:40
Go outside.

11:41
Go back inside.

11:42
Go on walking inspection of house interior.

11:43
Inspection complete. Check demonland. Feel nagging anxiety increase.

12:05
Check phone. Fail to cheer up over cheering messages, hit maximum anxiety over jeering messages.

12:10
Check demonland.

12:40
Go outside.

12:41
Go back inside.

12:42
Watch  television. It's all crap.

13:00
Go for walk to calm nerves.

13:05
A fat lot of good that did. Go back home.

13:10
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

13:11
Stupid meditation. Remember cold coffee. Put in microwave.

13:12
Make lunch in spite of no appetite.

13:30
Sit down for lunch.

13:40
Throw uneaten lunch in bin. Put kettle on for coffee.

13:45
Check Bunnings web site. Order seeds, potting mix, gardening gloves and stanley knife.

14:00
Check demonland.

14:30
Go outside.

14:31
Go back inside.

14:32
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

14:33
Stupid meditation. Re-boil kettle.

14:44
Search for old footy to have a kick to settle nerves.

14:55
Find footy. Discover laces old and broken. Search for pump.

15:10
Find pump. Pump up footy. Bladder bulges out where laces disintegrated. Throw footy in bin.

15:15
Check demonland.

15:45
Re-boil kettle.

15:46
Remember the sun is over the yardarm. Check supply of spirits. Whiskey!

15:47
Fret that whiskey supply is low. Check web site for nearest Dan's or BWS.

15:55
Drive to bottle shop. Pick up whiskey.

16:25
Re-boil kettle.

16:30
Get message from Bunnings that order is ready for collection.

16:32
Get in car, drive to Bunnings, pick up order. Note number of cars with Doggies scarves. Anxiety level to 90%.

17:15
Re-boil kettle. Turn on tv for pre-match warmup shows. They're all crap.

18:00
Re-boil kettle, make coffee. Add whiskey. Ahhhhh.

18:10
Discover nerves are at 100% fever pitch despite whiskey. Go outside.

18:11
Go back inside.

18:12
Meditate to sooth jangled nerves.

18:13
Stupid meditation. Check demonland.

18:45
Nearly game time. Panic attack. Boil kettle for coffee. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

18:50
Make coffee. Trembling hands spill it everywhere. Re-boil kettle. Take shot of whiskey straight while waiting.

19:00
Watch players warm up. Sooth jangled nerves by cheering demons and booing dogs. Desperately try to ascertain clues to performance by how the players jog sideways, roll the ball on the ground, etc. Anxiety increase to 150%.

19:10
Anthem and other frippery. Rage at universe for making you wait.

19:15
Game on! Watch as demons tear the dogs a new one. Race around living room with each goal as Demons pile on a record score. Catharsis, and all emotion is replaced by a joyful high.

10:00
Rejoice as the demons hoist the cup. Laugh, cry, text friends, take straight shot of whiskey. Take another straight shot of whiskey.

10:30
Check demonland.

Sunday 26 sep
03:00
Go to bed. Fail to sleep.

I don't think we have ever met, but stuff me if that doesn't perfectly describe my day. I am going to be a total wreck by game time. And 4 whisky's is not enough.

[He de mon 730]

I haven't had a drink for a year, but a spliff would go down nicely to help calm the nerves. Alas, I don't move in those circles anymore.

I will probably stay at home and watch it with my wife. i am not sure I could be in public to witness another Grand final loss. Still carred from 88 and 2000.

Edited September 13, 2021 by He de mon

[The heart beats true 16,003]

The number of people who are saying they’ll flout the rules makes a joke of the last few months.

House to house transmission is the reason Melbourne specifically is in this mess. House to house transmission is code for people doing the wrong thing - and seeing people outside their home, by going into someone else’s.

That specifically is the reason we can’t go to the MCG and see our team, and if you want to repay the sacrifices of the vast majority of us, and the medical community, by doing the exact opposite of what’s currently being asked of you then I’m super disappointed.

Edited September 13, 2021 by The heart beats true

[Winners at last 4,672]

I live on my own. My elder daughter is my bubble buddy and, of course, a Demons supporter. She'll be coming round to watch the match with me. 

My other 2 kids live in London and Sydney respectively. Both are Demons supporters and are totally over the moon about the team's run this season. We'll be in constant communication during the match.