Jump to content

Discussion on recent allegations about the use of illicit drugs in football is forbidden
  • IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING

    Posting unsubstantiated rumours on this website is strictly forbidden.

    Demonland has made the difficult decision to not permit this platform to be used to discuss & debate the off-field issues relating to the Melbourne Football Club including matters currently being litigated between the Club & former Board members, board elections, the issue of illicit drugs in footy, the culture at the club & the personal issues & allegations against some of our players & officials ...

    We do not take these issues & this decision lightly & of course we believe that these serious matters affecting the club we love & are so passionate about are worthy of discussion & debate & I wish we could provide a place where these matters can be discussed in a civil & respectful manner.

    However these discussions unfortunately invariably devolve into areas that may be defamatory, libelous, spread unsubstantiated rumours & can effect the mental health of those involved. Even discussion & debate of known facts or media reports can lead to finger pointing, blame & personal attacks.

    The repercussion is that these discussions can open this website, it’s owners & it’s users to legal action & may result in this website being forced to shutdown.

    Our moderating team are all volunteers & cannot moderate the forum 24/7 & as a consequence problematic content that contravenes our rules & standards may go unnoticed for some time before it can be removed.

    We reserve the right to delete posts that offend against our above policy & indeed, to ban posters who are repeat offenders or who breach our code of conduct.

    WE HAVE BUILT A FANTASTIC ONLINE COMMUNITY AT DEMONLAND OVER THE PAST 23 YEARS & WE WOULD LIKE TO CONTINUE TO BE ABLE TO DISCUSS THE CLUB WE LOVE & ARE SO PASSIONATE ABOUT.

    Thank you for your continued support & understanding. Go Dees.


Sensational News!


Demonstone

Recommended Posts

Boy oh boy!  Wowee!  I almost spat out my cornflakes when I came across this news item in The Daily Bugle this morning.

It's absolutely incredible!  I can scarcely believe it...

I hope it's OK by the mods if I reproduce the article in full.

 

In what is believed to be a first in world sport, Melbourne Football Club is on the verge of sacking its entire coaching staff and replacing them with a group of fans from their website Demonland.

This innovative and radical move would save Melbourne millions of dollars and shore up their financial position in perpetuity.

An anonymous source from within the club says that they have long valued and admired the collective judgement and football wisdom of Demonland posters and that it would make sense to make use of their talents, particularly when it would cost nothing at all.

CEO Gary Pert has refused to comment publicly, but insiders claim that he sees this move as a game changer that would put Melbourne ahead of the curve.

When contacted for comment, under siege coach Simon Goodwin stared into the middle distance while absentmindedly scratching his left leg before saying in a flat voice "The reality bus is full of learnings and I've recognised for some time that Demonland posters know much more about this coaching caper than I ever will.  I could see their involvement bringing about instant and ongoing success for the team."

Our source can also reveal that List Manager Tim Lamb has conceded that his position was redundant given the collective expertise on tap and was looking forward to Melbourne cutting out all the deadwood on the list and winning every trade period in future.

Recruiting guru Jason Taylor is said to be equally enthused and was overheard saying that he was looking forward to the parade of champions that would be drafted from here on and that the Demons would never pick another spud with the experts in charge.

President Glen Bartlett has privately conceded that the entire football department is on notice, with the possible exception of the boot studder, the doorman and the bloke who cuts up the oranges at three quarter time.

The Selection Committee is also expected to be given their marching orders and be replaced by a poster who has not been identified but is believed to live in the vicinity of Werribee and who has agreed to take on the task of weekly team selection on the proviso that the side is printed IN UPPER CASE.

While this amazing news has been greeted with widespread enthusiasm from the Demonland faithful, a cautionary note has been sounded by one long-time fan who wished to remain anonymous but agreed that he was an Old Dee and said that he was pessimistic that these changes would help and predicted that Melbourne would never be any good.

Melbourne Football Club remain tight-lipped about this visionary proposal with a formal announcement expected to be made at a supporters function to be held on 1st April at the Spearmint Rhino Gentlemen's Club in King Street.

  • Like 7
  • Love 9
  • Haha 27
  • Facepalm 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Your finest work yet Demonstone

The AFL should consider choosing its umpires from Demonland posters as well. There’s no question the quality of umpiring decisions would increase exponentially. And no doubt our DL umpiring experts will be only too willing to put their hands up for the job.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites


4 hours ago, demonstone said:

Boy oh boy!  Wowee!  I almost spat out my cornflakes when I came across this news item in The Daily Bugle this morning.

It's absolutely incredible!  I can scarcely believe it...

I hope it's OK by the mods if I reproduce the article in full.

 

In what is believed to be a first in world sport, Melbourne Football Club is on the verge of sacking its entire coaching staff and replacing them with a group of fans from their website Demonland.

This innovative and radical move would save Melbourne millions of dollars and shore up their financial position in perpetuity.

An anonymous source from within the club says that they have long valued and admired the collective judgement and football wisdom of Demonland posters and that it would make sense to make use of their talents, particularly when it would cost nothing at all.

CEO Gary Pert has refused to comment publicly, but insiders claim that he sees this move as a game changer that would put Melbourne ahead of the curve.

When contacted for comment, under siege coach Simon Goodwin stared into the middle distance while absentmindedly scratching his left leg before saying in a flat voice "The reality bus is full of learnings and I've recognised for some time that Demonland posters know much more about this coaching caper than I ever will.  I could see their involvement bringing about instant and ongoing success for the team."

Our source can also reveal that List Manager Tim Lamb has conceded that his position was redundant given the collective expertise on tap and was looking forward to Melbourne cutting out all the deadwood on the list and winning every trade period in future.

Recruiting guru Jason Taylor is said to be equally enthused and was overheard saying that he was looking forward to the parade of champions that would be drafted from here on and that the Demons would never pick another spud with the experts in charge.

President Glen Bartlett has privately conceded that the entire football department is on notice, with the possible exception of the boot studder, the doorman and the bloke who cuts up the oranges at three quarter time.

The Selection Committee is also expected to be given their marching orders and be replaced by a poster who has not been identified but is believed to live in the vicinity of Werribee and who has agreed to take on the task of weekly team selection on the proviso that the side is printed IN UPPER CASE.

While this amazing news has been greeted with widespread enthusiasm from the Demonland faithful, a cautionary note has been sounded by one long-time fan who wished to remain anonymous but agreed that he was an Old Dee and said that he was pessimistic that these changes would help and predicted that Melbourne would never be any good.

Melbourne Football Club remain tight-lipped about this visionary proposal with a formal announcement expected to be made at a supporters function to be held on 1st April at the Spearmint Rhino Gentlemen's Club in King Street.

There is talk that Saty read this article and immediately had a coronary. 

 

  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Can I start by saying that I wont play favourites OR Love childs. Staright down the line perform,...... or your OUT?

Edited by picket fence
  • Like 1
  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, picket fence said:

Can I start by saying that I wont play favourites OR Love childs. Staright down the line perform...... ir your OUT?

But Clarry will not be dropped under any circumstances 

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, In Harmes Way said:

But Clarry will not be dropped under any circumstances 

Brcause Clarry is untouchable? just call me "the Ruthless P.F"

Edited by picket fence
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

9 hours ago, demonstone said:

This innovative and radical move would save Melbourne millions of dollars and shore up their financial position in perpetuity.

An anonymous source from within the club says that they have long valued and admired the collective judgement and football wisdom of Demonland posters and that it would make sense to make use of their talents, particularly when it would cost nothing at all. 

Get stuffed, I command a high price for this level of wisdom and insight

  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites


Any more than 10 witches hats on the oval at one time and we have a problem..

Take it to the bank.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Demonland Forums  

  • Match Previews, Reports & Articles  

    DEPTH CHARGE by Whispering Jack

    The jubilation on the coach’s face as he danced a celebratory jig by the playing bench after the final siren sounded to record his team’s four-point victory over the Demons when the teams last met, said it all.    On that rainy Friday night at the Adelaide Oval, Ken Hinkley’s young midfield secured much more than four points on offer. The victory over one of the big dogs of the competition after a succession of wins over some of its lesser lights gave his team respect and validation fo

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 5

    TRAINING: Monday 25th March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatchers Demon Dynasty & Kev Martin were trackside at Gosch's Paddock today to bring you their observations from training. DEMON DYNASTY'S TRAINING OBSERVATIONS Kade Chandler's left knee heavily strapped. BBB, Spargs & Jake Lever also in rehab group. Jake Bowey solo running separate kicking/sprint/agility drills. Super fine morning / early arvo at Gosch's for the boys to blow out some cobwebs. Choco initially had the light duties / rehab group

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Training Reports

    HIBERNATING by KC from Casey

    When they locked up the rooms for summer at the end of last year’s football season, the rooms gathered cobwebs, the atmosphere became dense and the place developed a sleepy feel. They opened up the rooms to let Casey out to play on Sunday but the team was still hibernating and they missed the bulk of the opening quarter. By the time they worked out it was game on, their opponents from Box Hill had accumulated five goals and, if the game wasn’t over, it might as well have been. For a se

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Casey Articles

    A FORK IN THE HAWK by George on the Outer

    For too long in the past, Demon fans became habitually sick and tired of watching the Hawks hand out thrashings to their side. But Melbourne’s empahtic 55-point win at the MCG on Saturday has truly put a fork in the Hawk and turned that history well and truly on its head. The Demons have now won nine of their last ten encounters with the other result, a draw.     And like a fork, it was the multi-pronged options that Melbourne had all across the ground.  It certainly helped that Hawthorn

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Match Reports 8

    PREGAME: Rd 03 vs Port Adelaide

    The Demons head on the road for the next 2 weeks as they travel to Adelaide to play Port on Saturday and then have a 5 Day break before facing the Crows in the Gather Round. With injuries to May and Lever who comes in and who goes out?

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 262

    PODCAST: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    The Demonland Podcast will air LIVE on Monday, 25th March @ 8:30pm. Join George, Binman & I as we analyse the Demons victory at the MCG against the Hawks in the Round 02. You questions and comments are a huge part of our podcast so please post anything you want to ask or say below and we'll give you a shout out on the show. If you would like to leave us a voicemail please call 03 9016 3666 and don't worry no body answers so you don't have to talk to a human. Listen & Chat

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 46

    VOTES: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    Last week Steven May took the lead in the Demonland Player of the Year Award from Jack Viney. Clayton Oliver & Max Gawn round out the Top 4. Your votes for the win/loss against/to the Hawks. 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 50

    POSTGAME: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    The Demons cruised to an easy 55 point win over the Hawks at the MCG but but paid a heavy toll on the injury front with Steven May & Jake Lever possibly sidelined for a number of weeks.

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 357

    GAMEDAY: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    It's Game Day and after mixed results in the first two weeks of the season the Demons have the opportunity to capitalise on their good form last week when they take on the Hawks at the MCG today.

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 437
  • Tell a friend

    Love Demonland? Tell a friend!
  • Podcast 

  • Podcast 

  • Podcast Stream 


    Open Stream in
    New Window
        TuneIn    Opens in New Tab
  • Support Demonland  



  • 2021 Premiership  

  • Social Media 

  • Non MFC Games  

    NON-MFC: Round 03

    Discussion of all the other games that don't involve the Demons in Round 03 ... READ MORE

    Demonland | Round 03

  • Match Preview      

    DEPTH CHARGE by Whispering Jack

    The jubilation on the coach’s face as he danced a celebratory jig by the playing bench after the final siren sounded to record his team’s four-point victory over the Demons when the teams last met, said it all ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 27

  • Latest Podcast      

    PODCAST: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    The boys dissected the clinical thrashing of Hawks praising the immense performance of Christian Petracca whilst lamenting the injury toll to our defensive unit ... LISTEN

    Demonland | March 26

  • Training  

    Monday, 25th March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatchers Demon Dynasty & Kev Martin were trackside at Gosch's Paddock today to bring you their observations from training ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 25

  • Casey Report      

    HIBERNATING by KC from Casey

    When they locked up the rooms for summer at the end of last year’s football season, the rooms gathered cobwebs, the atmosphere became dense and the place developed a sleepy feel. They opened up the rooms to let Casey out to play on Sunday but the team was still hibernating and they missed the bulk of the opening quarter ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 25

  • PreGame      

    PREGAME: Rd 03 vs Port Adelaide

    The Demons head out on the road for the next 2 weeks as they travel to Adelaide to play Port on Saturday and then have a 5 Day break before facing the Crows in Gather Round. With injuries to May and Lever who comes in and who goes out? ...READ MORE

    Demonland | March 28

  • Match Report      

    A FORK IN THE HAWK by George on the Outer

    For too long in the past, Demon fans became habitually sick and tired of watching the Hawks hand out thrashings to their side. But Melbourne’s empahtic 55-point win at the MCG on Saturday has truly put a fork in the Hawk and turned that history well and truly on its head ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 23

  • Post Game      

    POSTGAME: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    The Demons cruised to an easy 55 point win over the Hawks at the MCG but but paid a heavy toll on the injury front with Steven May & Jake Lever possibly sidelined for a number of weeks ...READ MORE

    Demonland | March 23

  • Votes      

    VOTES: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    Last week Steven May took the lead in the Demonland Player of the Year Award from Jack Viney. Clayton Oliver & Max Gawn round out the Top 4. Your votes for the win/loss against/to the Hawks. 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 ...READ MORE

    Demonland | March 23

  • Game Day      

    GAMEDAY: Round 02 vs Hawthorn

    It's Game Day and after mixed results in the first two weeks of the season the Demons have the opportunity to capitalise on their good form last week when they take on the Hawks at the MCG today ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 23

  • Training  

    Friday, 22nd March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatcher Kev Martin and I attended the Captain's Run at Gosch's Paddock on this lovely sunny morning to bring you the following observations from the training session ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 22

  • Training  

    Tuesday, 19th March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatchers Kev Martin & Walking Civil War attended Tuesday morning's training session at Gosch's Paddock to bring you the following observations ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 19

  • Training  

    Saturday, 16th March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatchers Kev Martin and Dee Zephyr wandered down to Gosch's Paddock on Saturday morning to bring you their observations from the Captain's Run in the lead up to Sunday's Round One match against the Bulldogs ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 16

  • Farewell  

    Angus Brayshaw Retires

    After 167 games including the drought breaking Premiership Angus Brayshaw has made the heart breaking decision to medically retire from football as a result of a series of serious head knocks over his nearly decade of footy. We wish Gus all the best and he'll always be a hero at Demonland ... READ MORE

    Demonland | February 22

  • Latest Podcast  

    PODCAST: Koltyn Tholstrup Interview

    I interview the Melbourne Football Club’s newest recruit Koltyn Tholstrup to have a chat about his journey from the farm to the Demons, his first few weeks of preseason training, which Dees have impressed him on the track and his aspirations of playing Round 1 ... LISTEN

    Demonland | December 14

  • Latest Podcast  

    PODCAST: Jason Taylor Interview

    I interview the Melbourne Football Club's National Recruitment Manager Jason Taylor to have a chat about our Trade and Draft period, our newest recruits, our recent recruits who have yet to debut as well as those father son prospects on the horizon ... LISTEN

    Demonland | November 27

  • Next Match 

    .

    Round 03

       vs   

    Saturday 30th March 2024
    @ 07:30pm (AO)

  • MFC Forum  

  • Match Previews & Reports  

  • Training Forum  

  • AFLW Forum  

  • 2024 Player Sponsorship

  • Topics

  • Injury List  


      PLAYER INJURY LENGTH
    Jake Lever Knee Test
    Clayton Oliver Hand Test
    Oliver Sestan Concussion Test
    Steven May Ribs 1 Week
    Lachie Hunter Calf 1 Week
    Daniel Turner Hip 2-3 Weeks
    Charlie Spargo Achilles 2-4 Weeks
    Shane McAdam Hamstring 3-5 Weeks
    Jake Bowey Shoulder 7 Weeks
    Jake Melksham ACL 12-14 Weeks
    Joel Smith Suspension TBA

  • Player of the Year  


        PLAYER VOTES
    1 Christian Petracca 27
    2 Steven May 25
    3 Max Gawn 21
    4 Jack Viney 20
    5 Bayley Fritsch 19
    6 Clayton Oliver 18
    7 Christian Salem 12
    8 Blake Howes 11
    9 Jack Billings 10
    9 Alex Neal-Bullen 10

        FULL TABLE
  • Demonland Interviews 



  • Upcoming Events 

×
×
  • Create New...