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A Sit Down with the Coach



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Noticed Goodwin when asked about the playing group said he had NO doubt they will come back raring to go to have individual and team success in 2020. A more experienced coach might have said, our strong expectation is..........  At this point all he is can do is assume that they will come back raring to go and fully committed both mentally and physically. 

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17 minutes ago, Sorry kids said:

Noticed Goodwin when asked about the playing group said he had NO doubt they will come back raring to go to have individual and team success in 2020. A more experienced coach might have said, our strong expectation is..........  At this point all he is can do is assume that they will come back raring to go and fully committed both mentally and physically. 

good grief.  Give it a rest.

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A very pleasant interview ...the only thing missing was a crackling fire in the background!

Said all the right things but in the end it will come down to how well we do at fixing the present list at the trade/draft table.  A fair portion just isn't up to competing and holding down a regular spot at AFL level or adding any value in terms of what's needed to fill the gaping holes and lack of depth.

Massive cull and turnover needed in the next draft and beyond.

Like any "good or great" coach you gotta have the cattle to make finals on a regular basis.  Culture and coaching the difference that can take you from just making up the numbers in finals to a GF and possibly a premiership but list management and clever selections/trades also play a huge part.

Anyway, here's hoping we do well in the off season in securing the likes of Langdon, Elliot etc and re-signing the likes of Frosty.  A big name recruit or two might also help change the negative narrative a little also.

Expecting a bounce in 2020 but we really need something more substantial after the horrors of 2019.

Edited by Rusty Nails
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5 hours ago, sue said:

OK. Could someone who believes that the coach should say something that isn't cliches and corporate-speak please draft the sort of speech they believe is appropriate for us all to read.  I'll be pleasantly surprised if anyone can do it.

I place no credence in coaches' media performances and don't even watch or listen to Goodwin's as the useful content is always zero.

However I rise to your challenge.

We now take you to the "tell it as it is" post-match press conference that we'd all like to see .........

 

Simon Goodwin takes questions from the press ...

"Yes it was a disgraceful performance. I haven't told the boys that yet. In the rooms I told them to hold their heads high. To take away the positives. But really, it was disgraceful. I gave them a huge razz at quarter time, again at half time ... By the last break I didn't bother. They were gone. I just told them, go and beat your man. Beat your man! Most of 'em wouldn't know who their man was. Hell, I don't know who their man was. Any of 'em. Next question."

"Look, we all know Jones shouldn’t be captain. He's only got the job because of them photos. [censored]ing hell. Why would there be cameras there ??? I still can't work it out. The b*st*rd. Next bl**dy question."

"Never mind what photos. I shouldn't have said anything. Next question."

"I made a presentation to the board. I said we’ve got to juice the boys up like we did at Essen. Did anyone listen? Well the other coaches did. I must admit that. They were right into it. But Jacko? Bloody hit it on the head. Don't go near any of that stuff he said. Look at what happened to Essen. He's got a point. But gee, what did they do wrong? I mean really. They were just unlucky. And some of that sh*t was the goods. Leave you on cloud nine for days. I miss that you know. The stuff I get from Thommo isn't up to the same standard. Next question."

"Well don't look at me. I keep asking the assistant coaches for a game plan and they just look at me and say aren’t you supposed to be in charge of that? I say, what are you assisting if you're not assisting in coaching? I know about winning the ball. Winning matches not so much. Give me some bl**dy clues for gods sake. They all just bl**dy stare at me. Then they hang around the tea room in small groups muttering and go silent when I come in the room. I went to Perty one day, I said, I just sacked Chaplin. Hoe about that? He bl**dy near freaked out. Said you can’t do that. Next minute Chaplin's back in his office! The [censored]? Why are you trying to undermine me, I said. Perty went on and on about contracts and bad press. Screw your contracts and bad press! That’s when I realised Perty was out to get me. A man can't get anything done when he's surrounded by people who are out to get him."

(At this point Goodwin gets two steel balls out of his pocket and starts rolling them around in his hand)

"You know what they call me? Old Fugazi. Yeah that's right. Old Fugazi. They think they're so [censored]ing clever. Old Fugazi my [censored]in' a**e. But I showed 'em! They tried to poison me yesterday. I'm sure of it. My coffee tasted strange. Like salt. Too smart for them, I was. I spit it out. My "assistant" coach Rawlings said that’s because you put salt in it by mistake. That's when I knew he was part of the conspiracy. You see, I never put salt in my coffee. Only sugar. Sugar, pure rainwater, and grain alcohol. In case it saps and impurifies my precious bodily fluids. He'll be first one gone after round 23. Have you ever felt drained after the physical act of lovemaking, Robbo?"

(At this point the MFC media manager called the press conference to a halt.)

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1 hour ago, Mazer Rackham said:

I place no credence in coaches' media performances and don't even watch or listen to Goodwin's as the useful content is always zero.

However I rise to your challenge.

We now take you to the "tell it as it is" post-match press conference that we'd all like to see .........

 

Simon Goodwin takes questions from the press ...

"Yes it was a disgraceful performance. I haven't told the boys that yet. In the rooms I told them to hold their heads high. To take away the positives. But really, it was disgraceful. I gave them a huge razz at quarter time, again at half time ... By the last break I didn't bother. They were gone. I just told them, go and beat your man. Beat your man! Most of 'em wouldn't know who their man was. Hell, I don't know who their man was. Any of 'em. Next question."

"Look, we all know Jones shouldn’t be captain. He's only got the job because of them photos. [censored]ing hell. Why would there be cameras there ??? I still can't work it out. The b*st*rd. Next bl**dy question."

"Never mind what photos. I shouldn't have said anything. Next question."

"I made a presentation to the board. I said we’ve got to juice the boys up like we did at Essen. Did anyone listen? Well the other coaches did. I must admit that. They were right into it. But Jacko? Bloody hit it on the head. Don't go near any of that stuff he said. Look at what happened to Essen. He's got a point. But gee, what did they do wrong? I mean really. They were just unlucky. And some of that sh*t was the goods. Leave you on cloud nine for days. I miss that you know. The stuff I get from Thommo isn't up to the same standard. Next question."

"Well don't look at me. I keep asking the assistant coaches for a game plan and they just look at me and say aren’t you supposed to be in charge of that? I say, what are you assisting if you're not assisting in coaching? I know about winning the ball. Winning matches not so much. Give me some bl**dy clues for gods sake. They all just bl**dy stare at me. Then they hang around the tea room in small groups muttering and go silent when I come in the room. I went to Perty one day, I said, I just sacked Chaplin. Hoe about that? He bl**dy near freaked out. Said you can’t do that. Next minute Chaplin's back in his office! The [censored]? Why are you trying to undermine me, I said. Perty went on and on about contracts and bad press. Screw your contracts and bad press! That’s when I realised Perty was out to get me. A man can't get anything done when he's surrounded by people who are out to get him."

(At this point Goodwin gets two steel balls out of his pocket and starts rolling them around in his hand)

"You know what they call me? Old Fugazi. Yeah that's right. Old Fugazi. They think they're so [censored]ing clever. Old Fugazi my [censored]in' a**e. But I showed 'em! They tried to poison me yesterday. I'm sure of it. My coffee tasted strange. Like salt. Too smart for them, I was. I spit it out. My "assistant" coach Rawlings said that’s because you put salt in it by mistake. That's when I knew he was part of the conspiracy. You see, I never put salt in my coffee. Only sugar. Sugar, pure rainwater, and grain alcohol. In case it saps and impurifies my precious bodily fluids. He'll be first one gone after round 23. Have you ever felt drained after the physical act of lovemaking, Robbo?"

(At this point the MFC media manager called the press conference to a halt.)

Take my hat off to you MR

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3 hours ago, Sorry kids said:

Noticed Goodwin when asked about the playing group said he had NO doubt they will come back raring to go to have individual and team success in 2020. A more experienced coach might have said, our strong expectation is..........  At this point all he is can do is assume that they will come back raring to go and fully committed both mentally and physically. 

You have no idea what a more experienced coach may have or not have said, more guesswork on your part

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19 hours ago, Pennant St Dee said:

Ffs you're not bad, go into politics 

You seen the warning signs last season and everyone got caught up in the finals wins last season against a couple of older sides. 

"I posted a while back" - was that before or after the Sydney game in Rd 20

"#1 3rd quarter team for the year, which shows the coaches are able to make necessary changes to counteract the opposition blah blah blah coaches can identify what needs to be done and impart the right messages and moves"

but this season because we are losing the entire coaching panel is no good.

Might have been better to keep your powder dry last season and stick with seeing how this season went

or more appropriately

Consider last years assessment as reason for not sacking him this season but weigh up all the side issues which saw us so horrible for the season as a factor to back your man, make some changes and give him 2020 to redeem himself. If it doesn't happen then you are justified in moving him on.

That's how the strong clubs do things

 

The fact the players are clueless and nervous with ball in hand is entirely coaching. They have no idea what to do and are like deer in the headlights.

Simpletons like your goodself can blame injuries or preseason or 6,6,6, or the draw or pressure of expectations or any number of other excuses. But that's exactly what they are. Excuses. We are supposedly a professional sporting club that has made finals once in 12 years. In a comp where 8 out of 18 make finals. It's laughable, and particularly so to claim that expectations were too high.

I think I have worked out your are Simon Goodwin. 

A question for you Simon. If things are so good with the coaching panel in 2019 why has every single position other than your own, changed?

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10 minutes ago, jnrmac said:

The fact the players are clueless and nervous with ball in hand is entirely coaching. They have no idea what to do and are like deer in the headlights.

Simpletons like your goodself can blame injuries or preseason or 6,6,6, or the draw or pressure of expectations or any number of other excuses. But that's exactly what they are. Excuses. We are supposedly a professional sporting club that has made finals once in 12 years. In a comp where 8 out of 18 make finals. It's laughable, and particularly so to claim that expectations were too high.

I think I have worked out your are Simon Goodwin. 

A question for you Simon. If things are so good with the coaching panel in 2019 why has every single position other than your own, changed?

And at the same time one looked into the Coaches Box to see 12 Coaches with 12 MacPro Laptops 💻 all looking blankly into space far too often. 

The Coaching panel was a mess. How much of that falls on Goodwin?

i haven’t heard an apology yet...

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Another in a long line of fluff pieces from the club

Nothing to see

At least  some on here have faith based on what I do not know.

The supporters do not need a fire side chat.

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4 hours ago, Kent said:

Another in a long line of fluff pieces from the club

Nothing to see

At least  some on here have faith based on what I do not know.

The supporters do not need a fire side chat.

faith
/feɪθ/
strong belief in the doctrines of a religion, based on spiritual conviction rather than proof.
 
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@Mazer Rackham re post #31

that sir must be among the very best posts to EVER grace the pixels of these Forums !

if there such a thing I'd nominate it for the John Clarke award.

Bloody Hilarious....and sadly too poignant

Thankyou

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