The No T$ No B$ Thread

[Moonshadow 16,125]

3 hours ago, hemingway said:

Strongly recommend pineapples indeed any fruit other than bananas. If you are tempted to have a banana after reading posts on this thread you know it's time to go cold turkey. Also time to go cold turkey if you start to develop an affectionate feeling toward any of the posters, one in particular. And, if after a period of time, you begin to feel this is normal, you definitely need to seek medical advice.  

Written from first hand experience Ernie?

Edited September 5, 2016 by Moonshadow

[pineapple dee 2,892]

3 hours ago, hemingway said:

Strongly recommend pineapples indeed any fruit other than bananas. If you are tempted to have a banana after reading posts on this thread you know it's time to go cold turkey. Also time to go cold turkey if you start to develop an affectionate feeling toward any of the posters, one in particular. And, if after a period of time, you begin to feel this is normal, you definitely need to seek medical advice.  

If any of these things happen, my first step will be to up the medication. If that proves ineffective, a course of ECT could help. Perhaps I'll take a holiday........... maybe Aleppo or Wangaratta might be good. Seems popular at the moment.

[ManDee 7,073]

31 minutes ago, pineapple dee said:

If any of these things happen, my first step will be to up the medication. If that proves ineffective, a course of ECT could help. Perhaps I'll take a holiday........... maybe Aleppo or Wangaratta might be good. Seems popular at the moment.

I've been to Wangaratta best you try Aleppo. The falafel is best no shatta.

Edited September 5, 2016 by ManDee

[hemingway 7,583]

57 minutes ago, Moonshadow said:

Written from first hand experience Ernie?

Like my novels, my writing is fictional Moon, from a foundation of personal experience. I no longer use traditional medicinal therapies as i have no time for the pharmaceutical companies. There are other therapies that are much more effective but I draw the line at thrashings or floggings. 

[ManDee 7,073]

1 minute ago, hemingway said:

Like my novels, my writing is fictional Moon, from a foundation of personal experience. I no longer use traditional medicinal therapies as i have no time for the pharmaceutical companies. There are other therapies that are much more effective but I draw the line at thrashings or floggings. 

Single malt?

[jötnar 25]

17 hours ago, pineapple dee said:

Not long ago I read this thread and I was concerned because I didn't have the first clue what youse were on about.

Now I'm actually  more worried because I'm reading this thread  and I think I actually get it. In my addled mind that is more of a worry.

[pineapple dee 2,892]

35 minutes ago, ManDee said:

I've been to Wangaratta best you try Aleppo. The falafel is best no shatta.

As long as I can get a shawarma and a can of coke, i will go there.

[hemingway 7,583]

14 minutes ago, ManDee said:

Single malt?

Yes , although I am not fussy. 

[old dee 22,816]

22 minutes ago, ManDee said:

Single malt?

You have hit the solution ManDee.

The elixir that cures all.

[ManDee 7,073]

6 minutes ago, old dee said:

You have hit the solution ManDee.

The elixir that cures all.

Good, send some to Stuie

[old dee 22,816]

5 minutes ago, ManDee said:

Good, send some to Stuie

The ultimate test!

Of course you can lead a horse to water however .....

Edited September 5, 2016 by old dee

[Moonshadow 16,125]

4 hours ago, hemingway said:

Like my novels, my writing is fictional Moon, from a foundation of personal experience. I no longer use traditional medicinal therapies as i have no time for the pharmaceutical companies. There are other therapies that are much more effective but I draw the line at thrashings or floggings. 

Ernie, if you're not living on the edge you're taking up too much room!

[Ethan Tremblay 28,300]

3 hours ago, old dee said:

The ultimate test!

Of course you can lead a horse to water however .....

Therein lies the problem, Stuie's horse is so high it can't lower itself enough to drink. 

[Earl Hood 5,787]

6 hours ago, pineapple dee said:

If any of these things happen, my first step will be to up the medication. If that proves ineffective, a course of ECT could help. Perhaps I'll take a holiday........... maybe Aleppo or Wangaratta might be good. Seems popular at the moment.

Aleppo PD? There are still seats available on my Cairo to Constantinople Grand Tour. Aleppo or what's left of it anyway, is one of the scenic highlights of this trip of a lifetime, however short that might be. Can I count you in? 

[pineapple dee 2,892]

1 hour ago, Earl Hood said:

Aleppo PD? There are still seats available on my Cairo to Constantinople Grand Tour. Aleppo or what's left of it anyway, is one of the scenic highlights of this trip of a lifetime, however short that might be. Can I count you in? 

This trip does appeal. I am usually selective about who I travel with. Can you assure me that there are no dangerous deviates in the party. I speak Italian if that helps and I can say " you are beautiful" in Arabic. ( and "thank you" ) . 

[daisycutter 28,460]

Just now, pineapple dee said:

This trip does appeal. I am usually selective about who I travel with. Can you assure me that there are no dangerous deviates in the party. I speak Italian if that helps and I can say " you are beautiful" in Arabic. ( and "thank you" ) . 

can't imagine you'd ever get the chance on one of earl's odysseys to ever utter those phrases. still i'm sure we can teach you new (appropriate) ones

[bjDee 1,247]

31 minutes ago, daisycutter said:

can't imagine you'd ever get the chance on one of earl's odysseys to ever utter those phrases. still i'm sure we can teach you new (appropriate) ones

When staying in the shared lodgings organised by Earl on this trip, how does one say "get that broomstick out of my back" in Arabic?

[Bitter but optimistic 21,180]

On ‎9‎/‎5‎/‎2016 at 7:44 PM, Earl Hood said:

Aleppo PD? There are still seats available on my Cairo to Constantinople Grand Tour. Aleppo or what's left of it anyway, is one of the scenic highlights of this trip of a lifetime, however short that might be. Can I count you in? 

As you know Earl, I am not one to spread gossip.

However, it has come to my notice (from another of the genteel class) that the travel equivalent of a Ponzi scheme was being administered from the heart of Hipsterland by a  fellow with disreputable Caribbean interests.

An hirstute former virgin from Spain is apparently making Five star bookings for two across your proposed route while at the same time organising some mud huts with camel dung stoves in the same locales.

I'm sure it's only scurrilous chatter Earl but  thought I'd mention it.

 

Edited September 6, 2016 by Bitter but optimistic

[Earl Hood 5,787]

12 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

As you know Earl, I am not one to spread gossip.

However, it has come to my notice (from another of the genteel class) that the travel equivalent of a Ponzi scheme was being administered from the heart of Hipsterland by a  fellow with disreputable Caribbean interests.

An hirstute former virgin from Spain is apparently making Five star bookings for two across your proposed route while at the same time organising some mud huts with camel dung stoves in the same locales.

I'm sure it's only scurrilous chatter Earl but  thought I'd mention it.

 

Nothing to see here I am afraid Uncle, just meticulous contingency planning on my part. 

Of course we want our customers to have the full Cairo to Constantinople Middle East   Desert experience. They have asked to have the full Lawrance of Arabia experience, camping in Bedouin huts, riding a camel through Wadi Rum and charging into Aqaba and so on. To make this happen I often need to stay in the nearest major city to negotiate our way with the local governors. Choncita, the administrator, extraordinaire makes it all happen of course. We are all about customer service you know. 

[Moonshadow 16,125]

13 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

As you know Earl, I am not one to spread gossip.

However, it has come to my notice (from another of the genteel class) that the travel equivalent of a Ponzi scheme was being administered from the heart of Hipsterland by a  fellow with disreputable Caribbean interests.

An hirstute former virgin from Spain is apparently making Five star bookings for two across your proposed route while at the same time organising some mud huts with camel dung stoves in the same locales.

I'm sure it's only scurrilous chatter Earl but  thought I'd mention it.

 

Jeezus you speak some indecipherable bs some time Bitters.

[Bitter but optimistic 21,180]

18 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

Jeezus you speak some indecipherable bs some time Bitters.

Of course you wouldn't understand Moonie. A far more simple register is used when addressing (as one must on occasion) knuckle dragging vulgarians such as yourself and Biffen.

You will note that Earl Hood, a gentleman of culture and refinement, had no difficulty in understanding my erudite epistle.

[beelzebub 22,225]

20 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

Jeezus you speak some indecipherable bs some time Bitters.

dont refer to him as the saviour....he already has a 'complex" 

[Bitter but optimistic 21,180]

Good morning genii !

I intend (weather permitting) toddling off to the prelim final next Sunday. Casey v Willy.

I believe it is to be played at Northport Oval. Is that the Port Melb footy ground?

I don't wish to take the merc so I shall dress up as a peasant and take pubic transport.

Could one of you inner urbanites tell me what mode of said transport will get me closest to North Port Oval.

ps  Don't let Biffen know or he shall want to tag along and ruin a potentially pleasant afternoon.

[beelzebub 22,225]

2 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Good morning genii !

I intend (weather permitting) toddling off to the prelim final next Sunday. Casey v Willy.

I believe it is to be played at Northport Oval. Is that the Port Melb footy ground?

I don't wish to take the merc so I shall dress up as a peasant and take pubic transport.

Could one of you inner urbanites tell me what mode of said transport will get me closest to North Port Oval.

ps  Don't let Biffen know or he shall want to tag along and ruin a potentially pleasant afternoon.

tram 109    stop 127

In your dressed down camouflage and assuming you will travel to Spencer Street; then pop across road and catch the Port Melbourne tram. There is a stop assigned for the oval. Should not trouble one such as yourself too much !!

Edited September 12, 2016 by beelzebub

[Moonshadow 16,125]

4 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Good morning genii !

I intend (weather permitting) toddling off to the prelim final next Sunday. Casey v Willy.

I believe it is to be played at Northport Oval. Is that the Port Melb footy ground?

I don't wish to take the merc so I shall dress up as a peasant and take pubic transport.

Could one of you inner urbanites tell me what mode of said transport will get me closest to North Port Oval.

ps  Don't let Biffen know or he shall want to tag along and ruin a potentially pleasant afternoon.

I suggest you take your helicopter and land on the ground, in the style of Peter Hudson, with a team of pompom waving cheerleaders escorting you to your seat.