Jump to content

Discussion on recent allegations about the use of illicit drugs in football is forbidden
  • IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING

    Posting unsubstantiated rumours on this website is strictly forbidden.

    Demonland has made the difficult decision to not permit this platform to be used to discuss & debate the off-field issues relating to the Melbourne Football Club including matters currently being litigated between the Club & former Board members, board elections, the issue of illicit drugs in footy, the culture at the club & the personal issues & allegations against some of our players & officials ...

    We do not take these issues & this decision lightly & of course we believe that these serious matters affecting the club we love & are so passionate about are worthy of discussion & debate & I wish we could provide a place where these matters can be discussed in a civil & respectful manner.

    However these discussions unfortunately invariably devolve into areas that may be defamatory, libelous, spread unsubstantiated rumours & can effect the mental health of those involved. Even discussion & debate of known facts or media reports can lead to finger pointing, blame & personal attacks.

    The repercussion is that these discussions can open this website, it’s owners & it’s users to legal action & may result in this website being forced to shutdown.

    Our moderating team are all volunteers & cannot moderate the forum 24/7 & as a consequence problematic content that contravenes our rules & standards may go unnoticed for some time before it can be removed.

    We reserve the right to delete posts that offend against our above policy & indeed, to ban posters who are repeat offenders or who breach our code of conduct.

    WE HAVE BUILT A FANTASTIC ONLINE COMMUNITY AT DEMONLAND OVER THE PAST 23 YEARS & WE WOULD LIKE TO CONTINUE TO BE ABLE TO DISCUSS THE CLUB WE LOVE & ARE SO PASSIONATE ABOUT.

    Thank you for your continued support & understanding. Go Dees.


Help Needed - Collingwood/Buckley Jokes


WAGSLEFTFOOT

Recommended Posts

Hey demonlanders!

I know we are all still reeling from losing to the filth, so here is your chance to let off some more steam.

A mate of mine ribbed me pretty well about the dees at my wedding last year and now its my turn.

I'm calling for all of your best pies and buckley gags so i can get some revenge!

Fire away!

Go Dees!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'd let it go if I was you, he may unleash on you again.

They knocked us off in the last round and they re-signed Bucks for 2 years - he'll get the last laugh on you.

Perhaps save it for after round one next year...until then let it burn.

Edited by H_T
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I only know the classic.

 

How do you know a Collingwood supporter invented the toothbrush?

If it was anyone else, it'd be called the teethbrush.

 

Edit: This website has a few http://www.skateboard.com.au/article/15-64623-1/collingwood-jokes/

Edited by Mickey
Added url
Link to comment
Share on other sites

59 minutes ago, WAGSLEFTFOOT said:

Hey demonlanders!

I know we are all still reeling from losing to the filth, so here is your chance to let off some more steam.

A mate of mine ribbed me pretty well about the dees at my wedding last year and now its my turn.

I'm calling for all of your best pies and buckley gags so i can get some revenge!

Fire away!

Go Dees!!

You want revenge?

they just shat all over us. 

It's time to be quiet.....

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ok Wags, Uncle Bitter will help you out.


Q: Why can't Collingwood supporters use postage stamps?
A: They can't work out which side to spit on.

Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Collingwood fan?
A: Because you can always park in the disabled spaces!

Q: What is the difference between a Collingwood fan and a pot hole?
A: You  swerve to avoid the pot hole!

Q: What is the difference between a Collingwood fan and a baby?
A: The baby will stop dribbling ..... eventually.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

23 minutes ago, Sir Why You Little said:

You want revenge?

they just shat all over us. 

It's time to be quiet.....

Obviously just ribbing between mates at their respective weddings. That's what he wants revenge for

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites


From Puntroadend.com.......adjust each joke as required:

Just to lightening the mood.

An Essendon fan, a Collingwood fan and a Richmond fan were all in  Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze. All of a sudden Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The mere
possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they were sentenced to death!


However, after many months and with the help of very good  lawyers, they were able to successfully appeal their sentence down to life imprisonment.

By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial finished, and the extremely benevolent Sheikh decided they could be released after receiving  just 20 lashes each of the whip.

As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh suddenly said, "It is my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to grant each of you one wish before your whipping."

The Essendon fan was first in line (he had drunk the least), so he  thought about this for a while and then said, "Please tie a pillow to my back
This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. The Essendon fan had to be carried away  bleeding and crying with pain when the punishment was done.

The Collingwood fan was next up (he had almost finished an entire  six pack by himself), and after watching the scene, said "Alright!  Please fix two pillows on my back."
But even two pillows could  only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again, sending
the Collingwood fan out crying like a little girl.


The Richmond fan was the last one up (he had finished off  the crate), but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said, "You support the greatest team in the world, your supporters are some of the best and most loyal fans in the world. For this, you may have two wishes!"
"Thank you, your Royal Highness," the Richmond fan replies. "In  recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me  not 20, but 100 lashes".

"Not only are you an honourable, handsome and powerful  man, you are also very brave," the Sheikh says with an admiring look on his face.
"If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And, your second  wish....what is it to be?"
"Tie the Collingwood fan to my back."

 

How do you know you are a Collingwood supporter:

1. A Halloween pumpkin has more teeth than your wife does.
 
 2. You let your twelve-year-old  daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

3.  You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
 
4. Jack Daniel's  makes your list of "most admired people."
 
5. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.

6. Someone in your family once died right after saying:  "Hey, watch this...."

7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
 
8. A ceiling fan once ruined your wife's hairdo.
 
9. You think the last  words of Advance Australia Fair are: "Carn the Pies."

10. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded, right off its wheels.

11. The market value of your car goes up and down, depending on how much petrol is in it.

12. You  have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

13. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

14.  You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.

15. You think "loaded dishwasher" means your wife  is drunk.
 
16. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.

17. Your front verandah collapses and kills more than five dogs.
 

 

For more....they have 12 pages worth....go to

http://puntroadend.com/yabbse/index.php?topic=2126.0

You will have to sign up to the site to get access.

  • Like 4
  • Haha 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

What has 48 feet and 17 teeth?

The front row of the Collingwood Cheer Squad.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Q. What chance does Collingwood have of pulling off a Premiership in the next two years? 

A. Buckley's or none!

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 years of linear improvement from MFC

6 years of linear regression from the pies

it is beautiful to watch. Pies have nothing to crow about. They were the youngest premiers, at the start of a massive premiership window and seemingly, deliberately fked it up! and continue to shoot themselves in the foot by signing a bloke that clearly cannot coach

Link to comment
Share on other sites


2 hours ago, george_on_the_outer said:

From Puntroadend.com.......adjust each joke as required:

Just to lightening the mood.

An Essendon fan, a Collingwood fan and a Richmond fan were all in  Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze. All of a sudden Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The mere
possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they were sentenced to death!


However, after many months and with the help of very good  lawyers, they were able to successfully appeal their sentence down to life imprisonment.

By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial finished, and the extremely benevolent Sheikh decided they could be released after receiving  just 20 lashes each of the whip.

As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh suddenly said, "It is my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to grant each of you one wish before your whipping."

The Essendon fan was first in line (he had drunk the least), so he  thought about this for a while and then said, "Please tie a pillow to my back
This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. The Essendon fan had to be carried away  bleeding and crying with pain when the punishment was done.

The Collingwood fan was next up (he had almost finished an entire  six pack by himself), and after watching the scene, said "Alright!  Please fix two pillows on my back."
But even two pillows could  only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again, sending
the Collingwood fan out crying like a little girl.


The Richmond fan was the last one up (he had finished off  the crate), but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said, "You support the greatest team in the world, your supporters are some of the best and most loyal fans in the world. For this, you may have two wishes!"
"Thank you, your Royal Highness," the Richmond fan replies. "In  recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me  not 20, but 100 lashes".

"Not only are you an honourable, handsome and powerful  man, you are also very brave," the Sheikh says with an admiring look on his face.
"If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And, your second  wish....what is it to be?"
"Tie the Collingwood fan to my back."

 

How do you know you are a Collingwood supporter:

1. A Halloween pumpkin has more teeth than your wife does.
 
 2. You let your twelve-year-old  daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

3.  You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
 
4. Jack Daniel's  makes your list of "most admired people."
 
5. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.

6. Someone in your family once died right after saying:  "Hey, watch this...."

7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
 
8. A ceiling fan once ruined your wife's hairdo.
 
9. You think the last  words of Advance Australia Fair are: "Carn the Pies."

10. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded, right off its wheels.

11. The market value of your car goes up and down, depending on how much petrol is in it.

12. You  have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

13. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

14.  You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.

15. You think "loaded dishwasher" means your wife  is drunk.
 
16. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.

17. Your front verandah collapses and kills more than five dogs.
 

 

For more....they have 12 pages worth....go to

http://puntroadend.com/yabbse/index.php?topic=2126.0

You will have to sign up to the site to get access.

 

After a crappy end to the season, this brightened up my day a bit. Pure gold. 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It’s a bright new day in a Collingwood supporter household. Baz, Raelene, and children Shaz and Daz are gathered around the breakfast table eating left over McDonald’s.

Baz says: "Son. Today is a very special day."
Daz: "Did we win the premiership again?"
"Um. Prob'ly. I'll check wif Dicko. But what I mean is, today it's ya tenf birfday. Rae, get me anuvver beer before I belt ya one."
"Is it Dad? I fought last year wuz me tenf birfday?"
"Woz it? Might o' been, ya know. I can't count past ten. I know there's some uvver numbers. There's 35 ... and there's 42 ... I fink there's more than that too."
"Does that mean I hafta start goin' ta school, dad?”
"School? School? School is fer smartarses an' Melbun supporters! No child o' mine is goin' ta school! Nor you neither, Shaz. No, son, it's ya tenf birfday so today yez get to go out and buy ... yer very own Collingwood jumper!"
"Like Shaz's?"
"Yes son. Just like Shaz's."
"I fought we shoplifted hers?"
"No son.  Not a Collingwood jumper. The f***ing rozzers can come and take most fings we got but they can never take away our Collingwood jumpers if we got ‘em a hunnerd percent legal."
"You’re real smart dad. But where's we gunna get the money from?"
"From this wallet what I nicked from some bloke at the train station yestdee."
"Geez dad, you fink of everyfink!"
"Thanks son. That's why I’m head o' the household and why I get to wear Nathan Buckley’s number on me back. All right, I got a big day ahead o' me. First I gotta go down the pub, then Centrelink, then I’ve gotta go to the track and sort through the left over race tickets. Then down to the Westpac centre to see if I can spot Eddie McGuire going in. Then the pub again. I'll see yez tanight in ya new footy jumper!"

Off goes Baz and off go the rest to the nearest Big W.

Raelene says: "Awrite, son. Pick out a jumper. Take yer time. Me and Shaz'll be over tryin' to nick a iphone."

Daz checks out all the AFL jumpers.

Shaz comes back. "Did ya pick one yet?"
"Yep. I want this one."
It's a Carlton jumper. Shaz can't believe it.


"Ya little [censored]! Wodja pick that one for?"
She spits on him.
"Mum! Look at what Daz chose!"

Mum comes over. "Yes, yes, what's all the-- what the f*** is this?"
"But mum, I want this jumper!"
"Why you ungrayfuss ... ungratesel .... ungr .... ya little [censored]!"
She slaps him hard and pulls out some chunks of hair.
"I wish I'd shoplifted a umbrella so's I could poke ya in the guts wiv it! Just wait till yaw father hears about this!"

They go home in silence.

Dad gets home. "Awrite, where's young Darren? Where's me little champ? Rae, get me a beer before I belt ya one."

Daz appears in his Carlton jumper. Baz nearly goes into shock. He stares for a full minute before he speaks in a cold, low voice.

"You barztid. You f***in' barztid." Reflexes kick in and he punches Daz in the guts, and while he's bent over, knees him in the teeth, knocking out a few. Daz collapses to the floor and mum, dad and Shaz lay the boots in.

Eventually they've had enough and stand back.

Dad says, panting: "I hope yez have learned something, son."
"Yes, dad, I have"
"And what's that?"
"I’ve only barracked for Carlton for one day, and already I hate youse Collingwood c***s!"

 

  • Like 2
  • Haha 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

9 minutes ago, Mazer Rackham said:

It’s a bright new day in a Collingwood supporter household. Baz, Raelene, and children Shaz and Daz are gathered around the breakfast table eating left over McDonald’s.

Baz says: "Son. Today is a very special day."
Daz: "Did we win the premiership again?"
"Um. Prob'ly. I'll check wif Dicko. But what I mean is, today it's ya tenf birfday. Rae, get me anuvver beer before I belt ya one."
"Is it Dad? I fought last year wuz me tenf birfday?"
"Woz it? Might o' been, ya know. I can't count past ten. I know there's some uvver numbers. There's 35 ... and there's 42 ... I fink there's more than that too."
"Does that mean I hafta start goin' ta school, dad?”
"School? School? School is fer smartarses an' Melbun supporters! No child o' mine is goin' ta school! Nor you neither, Shaz. No, son, it's ya tenf birfday so today yez get to go out and buy ... yer very own Collingwood jumper!"
"Like Shaz's?"
"Yes son. Just like Shaz's."
"I fought we shoplifted hers?"
"No son.  Not a Collingwood jumper. The f***ing rozzers can come and take most fings we got but they can never take away our Collingwood jumpers if we got ‘em a hunnerd percent legal."
"You’re real smart dad. But where's we gunna get the money from?"
"From this wallet what I nicked from some bloke at the train station yestdee."
"Geez dad, you fink of everyfink!"
"Thanks son. That's why I’m head o' the household and why I get to wear Nathan Buckley’s number on me back. All right, I got a big day ahead o' me. First I gotta go down the pub, then Centrelink, then I’ve gotta go to the track and sort through the left over race tickets. Then down to the Westpac centre to see if I can spot Eddie McGuire going in. Then the pub again. I'll see yez tanight in ya new footy jumper!"

Off goes Baz and off go the rest to the nearest Big W.

Raelene says: "Awrite, son. Pick out a jumper. Take yer time. Me and Shaz'll be over tryin' to nick a iphone."

Daz checks out all the AFL jumpers.

Shaz comes back. "Did ya pick one yet?"
"Yep. I want this one."
It's a Carlton jumper. Shaz can't believe it.


"Ya little [censored]! Wodja pick that one for?"
She spits on him.
"Mum! Look at what Daz chose!"

Mum comes over. "Yes, yes, what's all the-- what the f*** is this?"
"But mum, I want this jumper!"
"Why you ungrayfuss ... ungratesel .... ungr .... ya little [censored]!"
She slaps him hard and pulls out some chunks of hair.
"I wish I'd shoplifted a umbrella so's I could poke ya in the guts wiv it! Just wait till yaw father hears about this!"

They go home in silence.

Dad gets home. "Awrite, where's young Darren? Where's me little champ? Rae, get me a beer before I belt ya one."

Daz appears in his Carlton jumper. Baz nearly goes into shock. He stares for a full minute before he speaks in a cold, low voice.

"You barztid. You f***in' barztid." Reflexes kick in and he punches Daz in the guts, and while he's bent over, knees him in the teeth, knocking out a few. Daz collapses to the floor and mum, dad and Shaz lay the boots in.

Eventually they've had enough and stand back.

Dad says, panting: "I hope yez have learned something, son."
"Yes, dad, I have"
"And what's that?"
"I’ve only barracked for Carlton for one day, and already I hate youse Collingwood c***s!"

 

Like your narratives Maze.

You are wonderfully [censored] up.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A Collingwood girl walks into the local dry cleaners. 
She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. 
"Come again?" says the worker, cupping his ear. 
"No" she replies. "This time it's mayonnaise."

  • Like 3
  • Love 1
  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Demonland Forums  

  • Match Previews, Reports & Articles  

    DEPTH CHARGE by Whispering Jack

    The jubilation on the coach’s face as he danced a celebratory jig by the playing bench after the final siren sounded to record his team’s four-point victory over the Demons when the teams last met, said it all.    On that rainy Friday night at the Adelaide Oval, Ken Hinkley’s young midfield secured much more than four points on offer. The victory over one of the big dogs of the competition after a succession of wins over some of its lesser lights gave his team respect and validation fo

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 5

    TRAINING: Monday 25th March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatchers Demon Dynasty & Kev Martin were trackside at Gosch's Paddock today to bring you their observations from training. DEMON DYNASTY'S TRAINING OBSERVATIONS Kade Chandler's left knee heavily strapped. BBB, Spargs & Jake Lever also in rehab group. Jake Bowey solo running separate kicking/sprint/agility drills. Super fine morning / early arvo at Gosch's for the boys to blow out some cobwebs. Choco initially had the light duties / rehab group

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Training Reports

    HIBERNATING by KC from Casey

    When they locked up the rooms for summer at the end of last year’s football season, the rooms gathered cobwebs, the atmosphere became dense and the place developed a sleepy feel. They opened up the rooms to let Casey out to play on Sunday but the team was still hibernating and they missed the bulk of the opening quarter. By the time they worked out it was game on, their opponents from Box Hill had accumulated five goals and, if the game wasn’t over, it might as well have been. For a se

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Casey Articles

    A FORK IN THE HAWK by George on the Outer

    For too long in the past, Demon fans became habitually sick and tired of watching the Hawks hand out thrashings to their side. But Melbourne’s empahtic 55-point win at the MCG on Saturday has truly put a fork in the Hawk and turned that history well and truly on its head. The Demons have now won nine of their last ten encounters with the other result, a draw.     And like a fork, it was the multi-pronged options that Melbourne had all across the ground.  It certainly helped that Hawthorn

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Match Reports 8

    PREGAME: Rd 03 vs Port Adelaide

    The Demons head on the road for the next 2 weeks as they travel to Adelaide to play Port on Saturday and then have a 5 Day break before facing the Crows in the Gather Round. With injuries to May and Lever who comes in and who goes out?

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 273

    PODCAST: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    The Demonland Podcast will air LIVE on Monday, 25th March @ 8:30pm. Join George, Binman & I as we analyse the Demons victory at the MCG against the Hawks in the Round 02. You questions and comments are a huge part of our podcast so please post anything you want to ask or say below and we'll give you a shout out on the show. If you would like to leave us a voicemail please call 03 9016 3666 and don't worry no body answers so you don't have to talk to a human. Listen & Chat

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 46

    VOTES: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    Last week Steven May took the lead in the Demonland Player of the Year Award from Jack Viney. Clayton Oliver & Max Gawn round out the Top 4. Your votes for the win/loss against/to the Hawks. 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 50

    POSTGAME: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    The Demons cruised to an easy 55 point win over the Hawks at the MCG but but paid a heavy toll on the injury front with Steven May & Jake Lever possibly sidelined for a number of weeks.

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 357

    GAMEDAY: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    It's Game Day and after mixed results in the first two weeks of the season the Demons have the opportunity to capitalise on their good form last week when they take on the Hawks at the MCG today.

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 437
  • Tell a friend

    Love Demonland? Tell a friend!
  • Podcast 

  • Podcast 

  • Podcast Stream 


    Open Stream in
    New Window
        TuneIn    Opens in New Tab
  • Support Demonland  



  • 2021 Premiership  

  • Social Media 

  • Non MFC Games  

    NON-MFC: Round 03

    Discussion of all the other games that don't involve the Demons in Round 03 ... READ MORE

    Demonland | Round 03

  • Match Preview      

    DEPTH CHARGE by Whispering Jack

    The jubilation on the coach’s face as he danced a celebratory jig by the playing bench after the final siren sounded to record his team’s four-point victory over the Demons when the teams last met, said it all ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 27

  • Latest Podcast      

    PODCAST: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    The boys dissected the clinical thrashing of Hawks praising the immense performance of Christian Petracca whilst lamenting the injury toll to our defensive unit ... LISTEN

    Demonland | March 26

  • Training  

    Monday, 25th March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatchers Demon Dynasty & Kev Martin were trackside at Gosch's Paddock today to bring you their observations from training ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 25

  • Casey Report      

    HIBERNATING by KC from Casey

    When they locked up the rooms for summer at the end of last year’s football season, the rooms gathered cobwebs, the atmosphere became dense and the place developed a sleepy feel. They opened up the rooms to let Casey out to play on Sunday but the team was still hibernating and they missed the bulk of the opening quarter ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 25

  • PreGame      

    PREGAME: Rd 03 vs Port Adelaide

    The Demons head out on the road for the next 2 weeks as they travel to Adelaide to play Port on Saturday and then have a 5 Day break before facing the Crows in Gather Round. With injuries to May and Lever who comes in and who goes out? ...READ MORE

    Demonland | March 28

  • Match Report      

    A FORK IN THE HAWK by George on the Outer

    For too long in the past, Demon fans became habitually sick and tired of watching the Hawks hand out thrashings to their side. But Melbourne’s empahtic 55-point win at the MCG on Saturday has truly put a fork in the Hawk and turned that history well and truly on its head ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 23

  • Post Game      

    POSTGAME: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    The Demons cruised to an easy 55 point win over the Hawks at the MCG but but paid a heavy toll on the injury front with Steven May & Jake Lever possibly sidelined for a number of weeks ...READ MORE

    Demonland | March 23

  • Votes      

    VOTES: Rd 02 vs Hawthorn

    Last week Steven May took the lead in the Demonland Player of the Year Award from Jack Viney. Clayton Oliver & Max Gawn round out the Top 4. Your votes for the win/loss against/to the Hawks. 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 ...READ MORE

    Demonland | March 23

  • Game Day      

    GAMEDAY: Round 02 vs Hawthorn

    It's Game Day and after mixed results in the first two weeks of the season the Demons have the opportunity to capitalise on their good form last week when they take on the Hawks at the MCG today ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 23

  • Training  

    Friday, 22nd March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatcher Kev Martin and I attended the Captain's Run at Gosch's Paddock on this lovely sunny morning to bring you the following observations from the training session ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 22

  • Training  

    Tuesday, 19th March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatchers Kev Martin & Walking Civil War attended Tuesday morning's training session at Gosch's Paddock to bring you the following observations ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 19

  • Training  

    Saturday, 16th March 2024

    Demonland Trackwatchers Kev Martin and Dee Zephyr wandered down to Gosch's Paddock on Saturday morning to bring you their observations from the Captain's Run in the lead up to Sunday's Round One match against the Bulldogs ... READ MORE

    Demonland | March 16

  • Farewell  

    Angus Brayshaw Retires

    After 167 games including the drought breaking Premiership Angus Brayshaw has made the heart breaking decision to medically retire from football as a result of a series of serious head knocks over his nearly decade of footy. We wish Gus all the best and he'll always be a hero at Demonland ... READ MORE

    Demonland | February 22

  • Latest Podcast  

    PODCAST: Koltyn Tholstrup Interview

    I interview the Melbourne Football Club’s newest recruit Koltyn Tholstrup to have a chat about his journey from the farm to the Demons, his first few weeks of preseason training, which Dees have impressed him on the track and his aspirations of playing Round 1 ... LISTEN

    Demonland | December 14

  • Latest Podcast  

    PODCAST: Jason Taylor Interview

    I interview the Melbourne Football Club's National Recruitment Manager Jason Taylor to have a chat about our Trade and Draft period, our newest recruits, our recent recruits who have yet to debut as well as those father son prospects on the horizon ... LISTEN

    Demonland | November 27

  • Next Match 

    .

    Round 03

       vs   

    Saturday 30th March 2024
    @ 07:30pm (AO)

  • MFC Forum  

  • Match Previews & Reports  

  • Training Forum  

  • AFLW Forum  

  • 2024 Player Sponsorship

  • Topics

  • Injury List  


      PLAYER INJURY LENGTH
    Jake Lever Knee Test
    Clayton Oliver Hand Test
    Oliver Sestan Concussion Test
    Steven May Ribs 1 Week
    Lachie Hunter Calf 1 Week
    Daniel Turner Hip 2-3 Weeks
    Charlie Spargo Achilles 2-4 Weeks
    Shane McAdam Hamstring 3-5 Weeks
    Jake Bowey Shoulder 7 Weeks
    Jake Melksham ACL 12-14 Weeks
    Joel Smith Suspension TBA

  • Player of the Year  


        PLAYER VOTES
    1 Christian Petracca 27
    2 Steven May 25
    3 Max Gawn 21
    4 Jack Viney 20
    5 Bayley Fritsch 19
    6 Clayton Oliver 18
    7 Christian Salem 12
    8 Blake Howes 11
    9 Jack Billings 10
    9 Alex Neal-Bullen 10

        FULL TABLE
  • Demonland Interviews 



  • Upcoming Events 

×
×
  • Create New...