This not written by me, I found this on a facebook page called 'The Calton Draft
“I went to a private school, yeah.
And I beat up on average 6.3 nerds a day. I was relentless. One time I saw a bloke walking to school reading a book. Went up to the bloke and said “oi, mate? You readin?”
He goes “sure am Max”
Grabbed that book out of his hand, ripped it in half and gave that little twerp a Chinese burn he'd never forget. That's my policy, no nerds allowed.
Be a nerd in your own [censored] time. Not on my time. My time is too valuable to hear some [censored] poin-dexter rant and rave about what the square root of Star Trek is.
Yeah I'm always pickin on the Uni blokes at the club too. Half of em wanna grow beards to look like me like they're [censored] hipsters…. My beard didn't grow… It appeared one day at the club when I unplugged Jack Vineys laptop when he was doing uni work and it died so he couldn't submit his last assignment hahaha. Suck [censored] Vines. That day I became a man!!!
It's actually pretty hard playing at Melbourne… There's a heap of nerds. We've got a list of 44 and there's probably eight of them. Wattsy is actually not bad hey… He's got a set of DJ decks so that means he's not a nerd.
Christian Petracca on the other hand… Well, all I'll say is that if he kicks a goal in his first game this weekend I won't be high fiving him. All he talks about is Luke Skywalker and other [censored] lame nerd [censored]. Haha that reminds me of the time me and J Hogz gave him a nipple cripple and he cried and told Roosy on us…
Think Roosy had some sympathy?? Hahah [censored] NO! He dacked him in front of everyone and it pretty much revealed he was more of a nerd than we thought… He had superman jocks on. He started cryin and that Hahahaha. Roosy, you're my boyyyyy!
[censored] the big Gawn dawg is a crack up… I bet every list wishes they had me on there. I eradicate nerds.”
- Max Gawn on his football club, nerd eradication and superman jocks.